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Confused friendship
I need help. Or maybe you should be giving all of my friends advice...anyway, no matter what I try to do to be there for some of my friends and love interests, it never seems like it's worth my trouble. Nothing ever really seems to work out. I know from experience that things always have a way of working out, but I'm tired of the wait. I'm tired of trying to defend myself, tired of hurting inside all the time. I'm not trying to blame all my feelings on my friends. I actually ALWAYS blame things on myself. I don't know if what all I'm saying calls for advice, because I think I know the answers to my problems. I just need to tell someone. I feel so lost, Crisco. I don't know where I am in life and I'm so afraid that I am going to give up finally. I don't sleep anymore; I'm not happy...with practically anything. I don't believe the saying that "you can't love someone else if you don't love yourself" or "you can't make anyone else happy before you make yourself happy". I don't believe it at all. I'm happy making other people happy. It makes me forget my problems. People tell me that I'm wonderful, and I'm worth it, and all the people that hurt me aren't worth me being sad over. I know all of this. I might not fully believe it, but I do understand that there are many people out there who love me. How can I feel better about all of this? How can I live my life without so much misery tugging at my chest? I am capable of love. I have so much to give, but there doesn't seem to be anyone out there who is RIGHT for me. The only person that I truly love doesn't even know it. I'm in love, and I'm scared of it. Help me. Please?
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I do know how you feel and I believe we all feel this way from time to time. Some longer than others. I know I can feel like thi for weeks at a time. If you don't believe the phrase 'You can't be happy with someone else, until you are happy with yourself,' then life could end up being very hard for you. You have to focus on things that make you happy because apparently all of the people that are supposed to bring you happiness, aren't. Focus on other things whether it's hobbies, or maybe just relaxing out in the sun or walking around thinking. Me personally, when I don't know what else to do and I feel completely lost, I look to God for advice. I ask Him for help. I know a lot of people don't have much or any relationship with God. To each his/her own. It works for me, though. I hope I have helped you some. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
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