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Hey, first off I just wanted to say I am asking you this questions because I have observed the questions and answers on your advice colomn and I like the out come... :)
Okay now for my question:
I really like this guys lets call him "Bob". Well sometimes he likes me, and other times he still likes me just not as much. That part confuses me. Well one of my friends told him to ask me out (w/o me knowing) and told me he said we were too good of friends, which I think is just a line, and is just a nice way to phrase rejection. Is it good that we are too good of friends? And, what if I want more?..I know that you are one of the few people that will take this question seriously. Thank you.
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In most of my experiences, I have learned that guys can play more games than most of the girls that I know. He probably doesn't realize that he's messing with your head.
From the small bit of what you told me, this is what I think:
Bob likes you. He likes being a good friend, and he also likes to flirt and tends to really like you at times. The parts where he acts likea friend and nothing more is probably when he's thinking a bit more clearly.
Now, I don't want that to come out sounding mean of me. I'm not saying that he isn't thinking clearly whenever he flirts, therefore, probably doesn't really like you. I'm just saying that he's thinking more about the concequences, and this causes him to back off a bit.
He see's you as a good friend, and doesn't want that to get messed up, so he tries to keep it like that. But, then sometimes, he wants more and starts to flirt and act like he really likes you.
Is what I'm saying confusing? Is it making any sense at all? This is basically what I'm thinking is going on.
I would say that he likes you as more than a friend, but is afraid of what it might do to your friendship.
I think it's great to become friends with someone before dating them, so, of course it's a good thing to be "too good of friends"
I think you should be honest with him about this. Tell him he confuses you. Let him know that you really like him, both as a friend, and perhaps more.
Let him know that he is confusing you, and you need him to be open with what he thinks about you. It can be quite stressful on a girl to one minute think "cool, this guy really does like me" and then the next minute be treated just as a friend. He needs to understand that, and stop being so darn confusing.
If it all ends up that he doesn't want a relationship, then that's fine. It would be better to know and be able to get past it, then to constantly be wondering. I wouldn't advise going through friends. It's much better and less likely to get confusing to you if you talk to him yourself.
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