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13 year old female.
This question kind of covers a lot of catergories so I wasn't too sure which one to put it in. I'll choose Love Life and hope for the best.
Last year I was a happy person. School work was easy, my family was tolerable, my friends were decent enough and I had boyfriend I could have fun with. This year it's all gone wrong.
I'm having a lot of trouble getting over my ex and it's making everything else suffer. My school work has just completely fallen through and I'm constantly unhappy. I self harmed for a bit but had to stop eventually. My family is a mess, my sister has behavioural problems and it is tearing the family apart. I am always bickering with my Dad and we just wind each other up. It's got to the point where I have actually told my parents I don't want to be part of their family anymore. My self confidence is so low it almost isn't there at all, I can't think of anything positive about myself and I feel like I'm a horrible person all the time. I am very rarely happy, I spend most of my time complaining or crying. I've tried to be more positive but it just doesn't work. I'm so scared my friends will reject me if I don't cheer up soon. I think about suicide alot and I sometimes get into moods where I just honestly want to die. Everyone I talk to tells me it's just my hormones because I'm going through puberty but I still feel terrible. I just don't know what to do anymore.
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Well don't let them just brush it off as hormones. In all honesty, it might be, but it doesn't apepear to be just you. You family seems to be having a few problems.
Before I start taking your problem apart and trying to help, promise yourself one thing - promise yourself you won't kill yourself. No matter how bad things get, suicide is never the answer. I've honestly never been suicidal, so I can't sympathize with that, but I do know it's not an answer. There's always the chance it'll get better.
I usually hate to reccomend this, but do you have anyone - an adult, maybe, that you can just talk to? Vent to? I don't reccomend a school counselor, actually. I don't trust them, so I don't reccomend them.
Anyway, what I would do as far as your friends go is pull them aside at one point and tell them what you're afraid of - tell them you're afraid they'll reject you.
I doubt they would, but let them know what you're afraid of. They might be able to help you out as far as that fear goes. All relationships, including friendships, need to have communication. Your friends should be able to help your self-confidence. They always helped mine. =)
Familial relationships also need to have communication. In your position, I would probably sit my family down sometime and ask them to let me talk without interruption, then proceed to tell them what you just told me, there are behavioral problems that are tearing the family apart, you're always bickering with your dad, and you're getting tired of fighting and all that. Ask them what you as a family can do to fix this problem.
As far as getting over your ex, I know how that can be. A guy I thought I was in love with broke up with me in the same week my dad got a job offer in Jersey, and my life like, fell apart. I don't pretend that getting over anyone, no matter how old you are, will be easy, but there are ways to do it.
Concentrate on his bad points. Write bad poetry...that's what I did. Lol. Write angry songs. Do something constructive.
Your hormones might honestly play a part in this, I remember when I was around your age a lot of my friends had suicide thoughts. But somehow, I doubt that it's the only reason.
Listen, I hope this helped on some level - if you have other questions, need more help, or want more advice on something, don't hesitate to contact me. You can IM me (SirenCytherea) too. I'm on pretty much every night.
-Siren =)
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