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Hiya
Me and my boyfriend haven't had sex yet, and i know that when we do, it will be my boyfriends first time. But not mine. But i really want that sense of closeness with him. Now i'm not sure wether to ask him, because that might scare him or something. Or innitiate sex without pressuring him into sex if he doesn't feel ready. How do you think i should go about things?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Well, I think that after you've been together for awhile, it'll be easier. I always think it's best to talk about things beforehand - after all, if he can't talk about it openly, he's probably not ready for sex. Talking about sex is not the same as pressuring him for it - try asking questions like, 'Have you thought about us having sex?' rather than saying 'I really want to have sex.' Leave things open-ended and he'll probably be more comfortable.
Even before you talk, it can't hurt to be prepared...just in case. Get some condoms, get on birth control, and then wait. When the time is right, I think you'll know. Obviously there is no 'You should have sex after _______ months,' but there IS 'You are ready to have sex because you are so close and in love and you are both ready.'
I think you should be aiming to get a sense of closeness with him BEFORE having sex; after all, sex is always best when it's with someone you are really connected with.
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