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pain..
u dun hafta gimme advice....i just really need sum1 to listen or i'm gonna drown in my own stress..
i've been going through a lot of stuff right now that r stressing me like skool, family issues, and my bf. skool grades r stressing me out my sister and other family issues i have r seriously getting to me...my bf is prolly the only person close to me who helps me get rid of my stress and listens to me. but lately, we get into arguments and i get stressed from that too. so i tried to do what my bf wants me to do in order to avoid nemore arguments like be happy all the time, talk to him more and call him more. and i also try to just take what he says and not argue w/ him. i try really hard not to make him upset. like sumtimes he'd be grumpy cuz he's tired and i'll try to talk to him all cheerful cuz he gets mad if i dun talk and dunno what to talk about. so i talk to him like what he's gonna do tomorrow and stuff but he just says he doesn't know and gets really grumpy. sumtimes when he misses a signal, he gets frusterated so i say its ok and try to calm him down but i just get a "what?" and i can't seem to make him happy most of the times... i get upset that i can't do nething to help so i tell him i want him to be more happy or at least try to be cuz it makes me feel horrible. he doesn't seem to understand me and how i feel all the time. i get really stressed and start to cry...he tells me to stop getting all upset but i can't help it... it makes me feel like i'm a bad gf....sumtimes i'll be crying for the rest of the night w/o getting ne sleep. i really love my bf...i really do. that y i try to do everything for him... my bf was the only person who didn't stress me but the things i do for him and his lack of understanding how i feel makes me stressed... and w/o ne1 close so just listen to me, i get all this stress built up and i start to get severe headaches and stomachaches...and now i often think about just killing myself and how easy it is for me to get away from my life...suicide is the thing i hate most but everytime, i just get closer and closer to doing it...sumtimes i feel so miserable, i start to give myself physical pain. i can't help myself.... i just can't take nething nemore....
sry if this was disturbing...i just want sum1 to listen....to hear me....cuz i feel like i have no 1 right now....
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I LOVE YOU CHIEF!!! *biggerest hugs* I will always be here for you... so don't worry if your bf is being an ass. Just give me a call or IM me... or mail me... n__n all is good. Life is good ok? Don't quit when you're this far in the game. JUST KEEP SWIMMING! JUST KEEP SWIMMING!
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