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Anxious about life after Uni


Question Posted Friday May 20 2016, 2:21 pm

So I'm about to graduate from Uni and I have had the best three years!
I've made lots of new friends and had fun as well as being set to get a good degree.

I'm worried though after Uni that i'll be lonely. I've heard some people see it as a grieving process because your so used to having loads of people around and then suddenly they've moved on.

Back home, before I went to Uni I was SO shy and had no confidence. I never used to speak in class and as a result only had like two or three friends. I've not kept in contact with them during uni and might look desperate to get back in touch now.
I just used to hang out with my equally shy twin all the time.
Also my parents never socialize with others much either, and we have no other family apart from the four f us.
So what I'm saying is, after such a fab uni experience I'm frightened that I'll be lonely after uni. How can I make new friends!?

p.s. I'm not shy anymore, and I find it easy to speak to people just don't know how best to get a group together.

Thanks! x


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adviceman49 answered Saturday May 21 2016, 8:58 am:
You sound a lot like my son. He was shy, didn't have many friends then he did a short stint in the Army for basic training (he was in the reserves). Then he came home and went to college. He received his degree and went to work.

The military brought him out of his shell, taught him to be a leader. He excelled in his training and again in college. When he graduated and found a job he moved out of the house and made friends with his neighbors and coworkers. He is able to make friends today wherever he goes.

I believe Uni did for you what the military did for my son. It brought you out of your shell and taught you to be a team player, a mixer and a joiner. You will not lose this skill just because you are leaving UNI.

Once you find a job, a flat of your own you will be relaxed enough to do as you did at UNI and go out and make friend where you live and where you work. You will make friends at places like pubs and nightclubs.

This is when the fun part of life starts. No more books, no more teacher, no more late night cram sessions and mom and dad not looking over your shoulder or pacing the floor waiting for you to come home. Your on your own now responsible for yourself and to your employer.

Now is the time to have some fun. You have worked hard all your life to get to this point. Soon enough you will have a husband and if you desire hopefully some children. Enjoy your freedom now or when the children come along their well being comes first.

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