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is this a way of telling someone they smell?
So basically my sister went to a hair salon and 5 minutes into the hair styling the lady was criticizing my sisters hair and giving her hair tips on how to improve it. My sister didnt take offense to that cause it was just hair tips. then all of a sudden they lady asked my sister how many times a day she showers, she said once but twice if shes out the whole day, the lady said shes a women she needs to be showering twice a day and that starting now as homework she must shower twice a day. So a couple days later the lady calls my dad to speak to my sister my dad was kind of weirded out by it but gave the phone to my sister, the lady asked my sister if shes done the homework she has asked her to do my sister compeletly forgot what it was so the lady reminded her that the homework was to shower twice a day. My sister said she does when shes out the whole day and the women got mad and said no you must shower twice a day. So my mom found out and was pissed she said that, that women was using code to say my sister smelled bad, my dad was denying it saying no she was just giving my sister womanly advice and then my mom got even more mad and said how dare she tell my daughter to shower twice a day and then call her to make sure she is doing that, shes basically telling her she smells!!!. Anyways i was wondering if someone said that to you do you think its code for them telling you that you smell or do they just genuinely feel like giving advice, also if you are a mother or a father how would you feel if a hairstylist said this to your child and then called a couple days later to make sure your child was doing what they said?
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I tried following Razhies logic and it made sense until I reread what you said about the woman specifically "the lady said your a women you need to be showering twice a day". That to me is not about hair. If she works with hair and knows her stuff, then the hairdresser would know that washing hair too often can strip the hair of it's natural oils and leave it dry and open to damage. So I don't think it was about hair. That lady had no manners and definately no tact. You don't tell a customer that they need to shower. I can guarantee if it were an adult female, that customer would have called in a complaint to the salon owner, argued with her, cancelled the payment to the salon thru bank, or got up and left the moment that was said. That lady is nosy and controlling. Don't ever go there and tell all your f riends to avoid her.
So she was refering to odor from your sister. Let me say what I think it was about. Your sister if she gets her period now, (you didn't mention age)
could have been on her period or the time just after when there are lingering odors and the bodys natural cleansing system is working to clean itself out. So at any point in time, there can be the odor of period. If you're female, you know what I'm talking about, it can smell like rotting fish, and thats because the moment air hits blood, that makes the blood smell. It can even be so if you shower and change pads often.
No worry about odors if you are in a crowd and people are standing around you because the period odors don't tend to go out from you horizontally.
Because of body heat in contact with the period emissions, heat rises and will take that odor straight up. Thats why when seated, I could smell myself and think, good God, I reek awful, how embarassing. But once I asked Mom or sis if they could detect an odor and they assured me they couldn't, i relaxed.
Think about it. The salon customer sits in a chair and the hair d resser is working right over her, right at head level so she is directly over her so any body heated scents, even of just the bodys cleansing fluids that leave yellowish stuff on panties or liners can have some odor. I am thinking this women may have smelled something that was related to a female thing, not a male so it couldn't be about sweat as both sweat. SHe actually said, you're a woman.... so i am sure it pertained to female scents.
If someone said this to me, I would explain to her what I just told you, that likely she picks up body odors much stronger than most people would because she's directly above the person whose body heat is carrying the odor with it. Its not that a person is dirtier or doesnt wash enough. Sure I would be irritated, most people get angry but I tend to like to teach people, especially if they open their mouth and fumble first. I usually don't give advice unless its asked for but in a circumstance like that, I would say, hey let me give you some advice, and also remind her that she won't have repeat customers if she keeps that up, or if she finds over time shes too sensitive to body odors, then she might want to get into another profession.
If my daughter came back with that report, I would go in person to the salon with daughter if she's comfortable, and ask to speak to the owner as they need to know if someone is not treating customers well as that will kill business for them. If she is the owner, then I would tell her everything I would have said if she's done it to me. The fact that the stylist called your home is going way too far beyond what is appropriate for that kind of business/customer relation and is actually intrusive and rude and not in her job responsibilities. The stylist was clearly out of line. Its not too late for your Mom to go back there and determine if thats an owner or not. If the owner doesnt seem to care, then get on any sites online where you can review a business and also t he Better Business Bureau and write down warnings for other potential future customers.
Your dad, not being female is going to be out of the loop on how such comments can affect females. If lets say the male penis tended to smell like dog poop at least one week each month, then He would have been equally upset if the hair stylist said, "I have to ask, is there anything wrong with your hands, cus you need to shower and clean yourself better, cus frankly, you smell like shit."
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The hairstylist was out of line. I wouldn't go to her again, and if she calls again, she should be told to stop.
Was she trying to say your sister smelled? Probably not. It is possible, especially if your sister is a teenager. Teenager's bodies are going through a lot of changes and sometimes that means having to change your bathing routines to keep up with new sweating and smells. That does happen.
But it sounds like this woman wasn't saying you sister smells, just that she has a very firm idea of what is the right way to clean your hair. (A lot of people would disagree with her too—my hair would be a wreak if I washed it twice a day!) Regardless of what she meant to communicate, the way she choose to share that though, was basically bullying. Bullying a young girl. That is not okay.
Your mom and dad may disagree about WHY the hairdresser did this, but hopefully they can agree it was not okay to call up a young girl at home and berate her. You should all go someplace else from now on and stay away from this woman.
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The hairstylist was out of line telling your sister she had to shower twice a day and them calling to see if she was doing so. I'm sure her heart was in the right place still it was not her place to say something to your sister especially if their only relationship is as customer and stylist.
Now is telling your sister to shower twice a day a code word for telling her she has body odor. I would certainly take it to mean that. If anyone were to know if your sister has body odor it would be you and your family. It would be your place to tell her as a family member if it were the case.
Now there are some nationalities that even though they shower daily they do not use scented soaps or deodorants. They have natural body odors that some people find offensive but not people of their own kind. To them it is natural.
Like anything else there is good body odor and bad body odor. The bad washes away with any soap and water leaving the good behind though it can still be offensive.
The short answer to your question is: The stylist was wrong and yes I feel it was a code word. The rest of what I've written is just to justify these last few sentences.
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