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Nervous About New Things
So I am 17 years old and i have been dating this guy for 6 months. All we have done is make out, he is a very horny guy and he always wants to do more and more. He wants to do everything, i think im nervous because i don't want him to think I'm bad at it. I am nervous about giving him a blow job because i have never done that before, and i am nervous about sex i just want to please him but i want to be good at it too. any advice as to what i should do??
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Well only do any of that if you feel ready of course. But if you are ready and the only thing holding you back is being good at it think of this... you can't get better at it until you do it. Putting it off just because you are afraid you wont please him isn't going to make you any better when you decide to. If he's as horny as you say, I think anything will please him. But you will never know until you try, and once you've done it a few times you'll understand exactly what to do. Make sure he knows it is your first time doing all of this and to give you pointers. Tell him you want to know when you're doing someting well so you will keep doing it. Talk about it ahead of time too and find out what it is that he likes. Everyone is nrvous about having sex for the first time, but it is important that when you do decide to go through with it that he knows you area virgin. Tell him to be gentle with you and you will tell him if something hurts or feels good. If he is a virgin as well he will be very cautious anyway. It is important that you aren't too nervous because if you are you will tense up your body, which will tighten your vagina and make it hurt when he is inside of you. As for a blow job, all that you really need to know I'm sure you already do know... no teeth, and suck as well as using your tongue. Have fun ;)
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Of course you want to please him and be good at it but you don't owe him that. Just tell him you aren't ready and you when you are ready, you will let him know. If he brings it up again, he doesn't sound like a good guy. He wants more than you can give him and it's not right of him to pressure you.
I was with a guy like this when I was 16 and 17. He kept saying making out wasn't enough for him anymore and he wanted more. If you do more with him, you won't feel good or happy about it.
To start getting to sexual things, you both need to really trust each other and feel comfortable with each other.
Right now, you aren't ready. You're nervous because you think he might think you are bad at it. When you become comfortable with a person you are in a relationship with, you don't have to be nervous about being bad at it because you know they won't care. They love you and whether you are good or bad, it won't matter to them.
Just wait to do all this stuff until you are actually ready.
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I'm just going to tell you that you and your boyfriend need to cool things down because it just seems like you and him have a physical relationship but no emotional relationship.
First of all I don't like this guy because he's pushing you to do more and it seems like he ultimately just wants to have sex with you and leave. If this guy was any kind of man, you could tell him how uncomfortable you feel and he would accept it. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO PLEASE HIM. Worrying about pleasing your man should come after marriage. Not some guy who just wants your body.
I know I am on the outside looking in and I don't know everything about your relationship but from what you told me it looks like this guy is just a sex monster. So I think you should tell him your not ready and that you want to spend more time getting to know eachother on an emotional level. If he agrees to slow things down, then he's a keeper. And please keep in mind, once you loose your virginity, you can't get it back. So if you have sex with this guy and then realize he's a total loser, it will be too late because he already took everything sexual from you and he's just going to move on to the next girl. But that is only my opinion.
This is why I'm always against underage sex because you never know what it means to the person you're doing it with. You could be thinking you're in love while the other person thinks it's a one night stand. Sex is tricky. It's not supposed to be easy for just anyone. You need to be in a good, loving, and mutual relationship. And when the time is right you'll know and you'll be ready. You're nervous now because I think deep down you know that you don't want to do these things yet but you're afraid that he'll leave because maybe no guy has shown a sexual desire for you before. But then again I could be wrong. I'm just saying what I see.
This may not be the answer you were looking for but I think it's the answer you needed.
~Andrew~
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It's quite natural that you want to 'please' your boyfriend by being 'good at' all aspects of a sexual relationship. The best way to be good at sex is to feel reasonably relaxed, confident and perfectly happy with what you're doing. Guys are quite often eager to 'get on with it', do this...this...that...you know? It's a rather more
daunting prospect for you ladies, I know. And rightly so. You're putting yourself quite literally into his hands...you want to know he'll treat you with affection and respect. So go step by step, at YOUR pace. Give & take. Try not to get too fixated on 'being good at it'. I mean, wouldn't he be more than a little surprised if you gave him a blow job like a porn actress first time?? In all honesty? But when you're ready to try it, and want to do it and feel comfortable about doing...well it's hard to tell you why, but it WILL be nice for both of you. If you do it against your real feelings, too soon...then it won't be nice. If that makes sense? Of course, the one thing you mustn't just let happen naturally, without planning it is actual penetrative sex. You've got to sort out proper and effective contraception WELL beforehand. I'd suggest condoms, that he must use and use correctly. Less-than-great sex isn't life-changing, pregnancy most certainly IS. Best wishes...and go at your own pace. He's been your boyfriend six months, eh? Sounds like he's not just after casual sex and even if he wants more, he's prepared to take his time with you. SOUNDS PROMISING MATE...you'll be right!!
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You're going to have to tell him that because you've never done any of this, you need time to be comfortable with it. Tell him that when you're ready you'll let him know, but until then ask him to be patient. You might feel lame saying this, but honestly, it's perfectly natural. Don't push yourself to do anything you don't want to do. You won't be able to undo any actions so take it slow.
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