project9's advice column

askproject9

advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: Hi project9,
I would like to ask you for some advice on what to do about my best friend. I have had a MAJOR crush on him for a long, long time. I have just recently broken up with my ex and have really started to consider him as a boyfriend. I don't have the courage to talk to him about it and was wondering if you could tell me some of the hints or things I should look for to see if he likes me in return. Whenever I talk to him, he sometimes jokes about hooking up and making out. Is this a joke, or for real? Please help me.
-crushed-

It really all depends. You can look, but from what you say - who knows?

...so yeah

Q: My second cousin is a pretty hot girl. And she thinks I'm pretty hot. So tonight we plan to ...well, do stuff (sex). Is this like horrible?

umm yes

Q: Does anyone know how to lose like 10 pounds realllllllllly fast!!?? and how to get a six pack? my BF wants me to get a six pack but does it look right on girls? HELP! AND FAST PLEEEEEEASE!
ILL RATE A 5 WHOEVER ANSWERS FASTEST!

Wow, that's so sad that your boyfriend needs you to change AND get a six pack. Is he your like master?

Oh, and, yeah of course they look good. Unless they're like body-builder people. That's weird. And exercise and eat healthy. Shouldn't be too long to lose..10..I guess

Q: i feel so ashamed of my self
i let my cousin finger me !!!!!!
we never see each other that was the first time we have ever met... is it okay that i feel guilty?!!?

i hope to god its like your 3493208th cousin. i mean, if youre a kid who's into incest then to you its not wrong. but duh - feel guilty... god... umm eww. no offense.

Q: ok im really confused about my sexuality (im a 15 year old girl).... i think i might be bisexual but i dont know. I've hooked up with a girl in the past but that was cuz we were drunk and i did it to kinda like impress these guys that we were with. and i do find girls attractive, but i dunno if i'd date a girl. I'd hook up with a girl again but it'd have to be under the same circumstances (not sober and to impress a guy)... does this mean im bi? Give me your thoughts on this.

on the nicer side...it doesn't sound like you're bi. But maybe like there's a small sexual attraction? But OBVIOUSLY you can't be bi if you need to be drunk AND have to "impress a guy." and if you're doing that, then that's sad. If you'd hooke up with a girl and not be drunk --> but maybe no one else is around then maybe you are... and that's fine...

Q: hey um this is kind of awkward, but i'm 14 going on 15 in a couple of months, and i belive i have met "the one" i've know him sience i was 2 1/2 and he wants to um finger me, and i am totally comfortable with it, but my parents arn't. should i do it behing my parents back, or listen to my parents and not do it at all, but my mom is the one whos conserned my dad doesn't care. i've haven't talked to them about it they kinda listen in my phone conversations with one of my good friends, have you ever got fingered or done it to someone? if not then how old were you when you did it, please.... im so CONFUSED! i'll rate!

If you want to do it, that is your choice, not your parents. Firstly, I accept talking to parents and I talk to my family about some stuff, but I find it's weird you brought something like this up to them (at this age). [[I swear I saw this question but it was 13 going on 14...?]]. Now, my suggestion - and this may be "bad" is that if you really want to try something that is fun and hot and will make you feel good then go for it. Just don't tell your parents. If he's forcing you, maybe its not good. But, in all honesty, don't let it go farther! Sex and all that isn't worth it at your age...or our age.

I hope that helps in any way.

Q: I need help dumping my b/f of 1 week..I mean he is cool but I don't feel a *spark* when I'm around him or even talking to him! He is one of my friends and I'd like to keep it that way.. but I dont really wanna date him anymore.. can you help me please??

-Molly

It is definitely important to do it sooner rather than later. I haven't been dumped (not that I'm special haha!) But I'm always the dump...er? anyways, I've found that with my friends and people I know it seems to work when you say "I've just realized I'm not ready for a relationship. I like you, but just as my friend" --- BUT this isnt necessarily true... soo... if that isnt true then its best to say "I thought I was ready to go out with you, but to be honest, I don't think I'm ready for it. *insert something here like I like you but I just can't go out, or I only like you as a friend, i made a mistake*

Hope ya got all that and hope it helps. bye

Q: well i jsut got my first b/f like a couple of monthes ago and he now hates me b/c this girl told all kind of lies about me to him but i cant call him or any thing (long story)..an 4 weeks when skewl starts ill see him in skewl and i plan to tell him the truth but right now m depressed and heart broken wut do i do???

you're going to have to find a way to talk to him. sooner rather than later. and if hes a good boyfriend then he'll understand and things will work out (eventually) and he will believe you. if not, maybe he doesn't feel as strongly for you anymore

Q: Girls can answer this two, but it would be really helpful if I got some answers from the guy's perspective..

How can you tell the difference from when a guy just wants to be your friend, or whether he wants more? There is this guy at my school, and he and I are friends, but not GREAT friends or anything. We don't hang out after school or anything. Sometimes in the halls he will catch up to me and start talking to me. And sometimes he will start singing a song with my name in it. Like for example, he will sing Batman, but instead of saying "dananananananana BATMAAAN" he will sing "dananananananana CATHYYY!" (Cathy is my name.) I know that he has a lot of other friends that are girls too, so I can't tell whether he just wants to be friends with me, or whether he likes me more than a friend. Help?

so you asked the same question as other people have. big effing deal. seriously people, what is this site? "advice" site.

anyways, you could probably outright ask. maybe not like "HEY JERK DO YOU LIkE ME?", but you know what i mean. if you're nice and you're is friend than you obviously have a chance. He either likes you, likes you as a friend, or "would go out with you"

just take a chance i guess. if he never mentions it, it doesnt mean that he DOESN'T like you, like someone else says, it could be a number of reason

hope that helps a little at least

Q: Is it normal to go through depressed parts of your day? (I'm 15 and male)

Most everyone I know has gone through it. Most of them go through it more than once. I have. It's common considering your present circumstances. Eventually you'll "get over it." But for now, seriously, it's fine. Be sad. Cheer up, though.

Mmkay, thanks.