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October 23, 2010Answers:
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Ok well im 16/f and i cut my self . On my wrist and dont tell me to use a rubber band cause it dosent work ive tryed or write in a jurnal cause ive done that to.. IT DOSENT WORK. my friend always asks why i have cuts on my wrists and i say oh my cat cut it. and if he finds out he will think im doing it for attention but im really not my mom passed away 3 weeks ago. and my dad abuses me. I have no relatives. so i have no one to talk to . so i turned to cuting . It really helps me but i need to stop . Because of what i tryed to do. Commit suicide but i stoped because my one and only friend caught me and grabbed me and took me home. I have had a really screwed up past . i was raped at the age of 13 and took drugs at 14 so now all of that made me really depressed . I really am loseing faith so someone please tell me what i could do to help i dont have enough money to go to a theropist so dont tell me that. im really scared of my dad so please help..
I am so sorry that you have had to endure all that has happened to you in your young life. There is no worse feeling than the one that no one knows what I am going through or no one cares. I have read all the other answers to your question and I agree 100% with the advice you have already received. You need to work this out with someone who has the experience to help you get through all of this. you have several things that are going on all at once, and each one is reason to get help. The fact that you lost your mom, I'm so sorry, I'm sure has thrown you into a depression, with all the rest that's going on. Your dat abusing you, the rape, the cutting, attempting suicide...All of these things individually would require you to get help. You can't do this on your own. You deserve a better life, and that is what you will get if you ask for help. It won't be easy at first, because you will be separated from your father, but this will be for the best. You should be concentrating on school and your future, but that is too hard to do with all that you have on your plate right now. Please don't give up. Get some help and keep us posted. All of us that have responded to you care about you. You are not alone. I will be praying for you.
Lately I have begun to lose faith in my religion and it's starting to bother me because I feel less protected, less comfortable. Kind of alone? What do you do when you lose faith in your religion? Any tips?
(I won't say my religion because I don't particularly think it matters... I'm sure a lot of people from a lot of different religions lose faith after a bit, but come back to it.)
If we can't question our beliefs then we are just accepting what someone else has told us to be the truth. Searchng for answers is a difficult journey, but one that leaves us satisfied when we discover the truth. It's easy to lose faith in religion, because religions are man-made. When we put our faith in our Creator, and develop a relationship with Him, then we have something that is rock solid and we are never alone or unprotected. Man will let us down but God never will. I hope this helps.
I just had a baby girl who is 6 weeks old and was never married to the father. I live in NY. I am breast feeding and will be off of work possibly until she is 4 months old. My question is what is a common visitation schedule when the father lives an hour away. Currently he comes about 2-3 days a week for about 3 hours. I would like to avoid overnight stays for as long as possible. Any advice?
I think the fact that you are nursing your baby takes priority over any other aspect of this situation. Of course, you can pump your breasts to collect the milk and then freeze it for later use, if you decide to do that. The bonding that comes from a mother and child during nursing is one of the most comforting things you two can share. I would not take that from either of you until you feel ready. I would not rush the overnight stays because of this one fact.
I'm the mother of 2 beautiful little girls, ages 2 and 4, and they are really the light of my life. I've been single ever since I got pregnant with my first baby girl and have been working hard for my girls to support them completely. Here is where my mess comes in at:
After I got pregnant with my first girl I've been alone. The guy that got me pregnant skipped town and I haven't really heard from him since. I'm strong though and I've done very well without him. I was laid off from my job a few months after my first was born. I couldn't find a job around here and couldn't relocate.
There's this guy down the road here that said if I gave him oral sex then he'd give me a little extra cash. I took him up on it. It was money to feed my little one. Things got deeper and we ended up doing a lot of things together and he would give me some money for my time.
Things led on and he kind of referred me to a few of his friends. After awhile I made enough money to pay rent and support me and my little girl. Then I found out I was pregnant again. It's so shameful but I have no idea which one might have gotten me pregnant. I'm not proud of not knowing but I was doing the best I could do. Don't get me wrong though, I love her to death, but it hurts me that I won't ever get to tell her stories about her dad.
One night recently I was with one of the guys and he asked me how many kids I had. I told him 2 and we got on the subject of the youngest one. He ended up saying something like
Well, when you're a prostitute I guess things like that happen.
I never thought of myself as a prostitute. I never have stood out on the streets looking for men to have sex with for money or something like that.
The problem is that I don't want to be a prostitute, but, apparently, I am. What should I do? There's no way I am going to find a job here that pays enough to support me and my girls. Where do I go from here? Should I keep doing this? I'm totally lost.
The words that were spoken to you may have been hard to hear, but it showed you how others view your lifestyle. A lot of our self esteem comes from how others view us. It makes us feel good about ourselves to know others have a high regard for us. The thing to think about is what will your children think of you when they get old enough to understand what is going on. You ask if you should continue doing what you are doing. I think you already know this is not the life you want for yourself and your children. The material things you may have acquired have clouded your vision. You never meant for things to snowball into the situation you now have. It just progressed from one stage to the next. There are ways to make a living to support yourself and your children without losing your self respect. I would consider tapping into the resources in your community. Going back to school is a good option. You can actually get paid to go back to school. you can also supplement this income by applying for public assistance. There is no shame in accepting help until you can get on your feet to support yourself. There are some programs that only take a year or two. Radiology techmicians make a really good wage and the training is not that lengthy. I would also see a guidance counselor to have your strengths and weaknesses evaluated so that you can be directed to a career that complement your strong qualities. Just make up your mind that you will not return to this lifestyle, no matter what. No turning back. Stay focused and good luck!