advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: Me and my boyfriend have been going out for almost 11 months in 2 weeks. Well I dont see him as much as i used to and as much as i liked to. cuz i moved. So its hard but we manage to see eachother at least once every 2 weeks. But this has been going on sense oct. But we see eachother almost every mon. for about 10 min. cuz i run into town. Anyways he told me tonight he is a bit depressed but he wont spill why. Im his gf.. shouldnt he tell? I know its hard.. but he was there through everything for me. He also told me when he was over at his friends house he could have gotten high but when he was offered he said he kind of wanted to but didnt. He asked if i would be mad if he did. He isnt a stoner.. so.. I dont know. I know that might be like apart of him being a bit down. i dont know what to do like how to react.. its confusing i dont get why he is bottling it up inside when i always let him in on what was going on in my mind. At the end of the convo he said that he would tell me if he could. So im hoping its not that bad he cant tell someone. Should I write him a letter? like what should i say in it because i dont want to seem pushy.
There could be a lot of reasons on why he's depressed. He should be able to tell you everthing and anything. Even though you dont see each other everyday I'm sure you've got a strong relationship. Me might feel that you'll think badly about him or something like that. Its ok to be persisten even if you think you maybe a little pushy its fine. Its alright to write him a little, just be honest about how you feel about the hole thing. tell him what you think......

Q: about 2 months ago my friend and i wereiin a huge fight... she was talkin bad about me behind my back... she told my friends i was b****y and that her mom thought so to... she denied she said that but later on told me that she did... and i said u lied to me and she was like i never said i didn't call u that but she did... we made up and got past our differences but it still hurts and i don't wanna bring it up because we've been in enough fights already. What should i do?
Maybe she's not really the best of friends if she wont admite to saying the stuff she said. Friendship is something that cant be taken for granted. Talk to her and be honest about how you feel now after the fight. If she is really wants to say your friend she'll tell you the truth...

Q: Okay so here's my problem...I have a lot of friends, and i would say 70% of them are guys. youre probably wondering what the problem is right? Well the problem is, i have a tendancy to fall in love with my guy friends because they are so sweet and the perfect boyfriend material type for me. Sometimes i think they like me by how they act around me, but then i find out they only like me as a "friend" I'm sick of being just the friend and i want to show the guys i can be more than a can i should my guy friends that i can be more then just friends with them? That i want to be seen as girlfriend material?
Just because he may over look you for now doesn't mean you dont have a chance with him. Just be yourself around him. If he loves another person then maybe once he's over that you'll be there to confort him. Its hard to see a good friend as some you can date, but if you lead him on he'll get the idea...

Good luck!

Q: YOU RULE. big time.

Q: I just recently had sex. I promised myself that i never would until i got married and now i feel horrable. I didnt love my boyfriend as much as i thought i did.

Is it wrong to have sex before marrage?
Everyone has decisions in their life, bad or good we have to face the consequences
that come along with them. Its not wrong to have premarital sex, but as long as your responsible about it. If your not happy with the relationship with your boyfriend communicate
with him and let him know that your not conferable with having sex.

Q: Everyone tells me to dump my boyfriend but i really like the guy and i have no clue how to tell him that i must break up with him. Well I dont want to cuz i really like him but I willn't do it. But i need some how to get across to him to shape up
Well do you want to dump him because everyone is telling you to dump him or because you want to? You need to make sure your doing this for the right reasons. Not because your friends want you too. A relationship is based on communication so make sure that you and your boyfriend have a long talk about your decision.

Q: Hey. Well i have been talking to this one guy for close to 1 year now...but the thing is...I have never met him in my life. We met through a friend of both of ours. He lives in a differant state and the only time i talk to him is on the internet and on the phone. I have told him I loved him and he told me the same. Do you think it is possible to be so in love with somebody you've never met?

(Sorry if that was a little confusing)
love is a great thing, Just because your in different states doesn't mean you cant love each other. I think he truely loves you.And you are really great person if he's been talking to you for almost a year. Its very possible to love someone you've never met. Even if you dont see him for, 4 years, if its ment to be you'll find each other...

Q: I like this kid that goes to my school, but the thing is, I kno nothing about him... and ive told my friends about the confrontations that we;ve had and they say that its a good thing, eye contact and him looking away really fast n stuff.. I jus wanna kno how do i get him to come talk to me or get him to notice that i like him or somethig I can do to get his attention.. I rate high~!

He might be a little shy and you might have to take the first steps. Nothing big, just if you happen to be in the halls together start some conversation. "So where are you going?" or if you see something intresting on him. "I like that shirt" just small talk. soon you'll be on the phone talking for hours at a time.....

Good luck!

Q: Okay. I went out with this one guy, like 3 times. And every single time, I thought he changed, but he hasn't. I used to think that I loved him.. But then everytime we go out, he acts like a jerk. At first he would just completly ignore me.. Then he would go on to throwing rocks at me and other stuff like that.
What should i do? Every time i try to talk to him..He says he will change, but he doesnt.How can i help? And he told me that IM the reason HE chews. Im about to go cut myself! Plez help!
Dont go on and take it on yourself. He's not worth you going this crazy for him to treat you like crap. Let him know that you wont be taken for granted and that you wont always be there. Even if he says he will change, you've heard it before so dont bleave him. He had his chance...

Please dont take it out on yourself.. i've had a few friends cut their self and its not fun...

Q: I starting going out with this one guy from my school at a ski lodge. He called me at midnight and kept saying how much he loved me, and he only knew me for 12 hours? I dumped him the next morning becuase i found out he was going out with TWO other girls that i didn't know about, at the same time We were going out. he also told those two girls that he "never went out with me" and "NEVER would" I completly freaked out on him at lunch and even slapped him. He denyed everythingg! I also heard of all these gurls he apparently screwed. What can i say tomorrow to him at lunch to make him spit out the truth??
You should talk to the other girls that he was with and go up to him with them. Confront him with a group and keep clam this time. Whatever he says just remember that he's just trying to get over on you and the other girls. Dont do it in such a public setting too, it might be a little easier for him to tell the truth if he's not trying to look cool infront of his friends at his lunch table.

I hope everything works out...

Q: OK-- I have a few midterms coming up. I already did one (English) and that's out of the way. I'll specifically focus on SS- since that's the next one to come up. Well, Im really nervous on how my grade will turn out on my Midterm. What are good study tips that will help me be prepared? What are ways to make myself crack down and actually study?? How can I make myself go in feeling confident?? There is a website that the teacher made with several 'midterm' quizzes, and I use that sometimes but it doesn't always help.

P.S. I really don't care for the teacher!!
Thank You!!
All you need to do is clam down and relax. If you stress yourself too much your not going to do well. Try locking yourself in your room, putting on some light music and just review over notes (good notes are great to study). Just relax and go over each question on the quizes that your teacher gives. Old tests help too.

Good luck !

I'm a well rounded 15 year old guy. I'm a soccer player and a swimmer. I play three instruments. (Saxohone/drums/paino) and i'm an artist. I'm just here to Help...

New Jersey

Member Since:
January 24, 2005


Last Update:
March 4, 2005


Main Categories:

layout by Adam Particka

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>

eXTReMe Tracker