Hello! My name is Sara, and I'm a junior in high school in Oregon. I suppose I started my hobby as an online advice columnist because in junior high my friends and I ran a small paper, namely, our advice column, writing under pen names. That was probably one of my favorite things to do, and even though we don't print it anymore I still am active online with that sort of thing.
I can handle quite a few topics/questions you may be wanting to know about, but I definitely excel in questions about (believe it or not) relationships, pets, technology, and things like loss. I have gone through a lot of things in my life, and having done so I have a little experience in some of the not-so-good or confusing things in life. If you have a question; any question, chances are I will probably have an answer. Thank you for stopping by! :D
E-mail: paintbrushaj@gmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Portland, Oregon
Occupation: Digital Artist
Age: 16
Member Since: September 19, 2016
Answers: 3
Last Update: November 30, 2016
Visitors: 1276
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Growing up i wouldnt say i was the prettiest girl in the world, no boys had a crush on me except for one who quickly got over it when a girl who liked him and was my friend at the time said "ew you like her?" then after that he got over it. This was in the 6th grade. Grade 9 comes along and i remember on orientation day these girls were looking at girls for this guy one girl pointed at me and the other girl said "ew no omfg shes so ugly" it hurt my feelings but i shrugged it off because they didnt know me (that girl who called me ugly ended up being one of my friends until graduation). Anyways grade 10 comes along and a guy makes a joke about me to his friend so basically his friend liked my friend but she didnt like him back so the guy made a joke saying "since it wont work out with her you should go out with her friend" and then he started dying of laughter and then his friend said "hell no". Again i took offense to this but shrugged it off, grade 11 comes along and i was minding my own business talking to my friend when this guy looked at me then told his friend "shes sooo beat" which in slang means ugly where im from, i rolled my eyes but it still hurt my feelings since he was one of the popular guys but i guess i should say whos laughing now because i graduated high school and hes still there. So grade 12 nothing really happened because everyone was focused on getting into a university/college. Anyways its summer vacation and im wearing a maxi skirt a guy yelled out of the car and said "daaaamn" then when i turned around he got so quiet and had a shocked look on his face, he ended up quickly looking away.Anyways growing up ive been insecure with how my face looks, the insecurity was so bad that from grade 9-10 i wouldnt take any pictures cause i didnt wanna see how ugly i was or anyone else to see posts of how ugly i am. My insecurity is still very much alive i have an instagram but wont post any selfies i only post group pics. Another thing that pisses me off is im not over weight but im curvy so whenever i tell my parents how ugly i am they only comment on my body shape, and even my cousins wife said she wishes her daughter gets my body shape. Body shape can change but your face (apart from aging) stays with you forever. Please if you have any tips on how to be more confident it would really help! Im in university now and confidence is key in forming relationships i guess (link)
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I am going to go right out and tell you what you probably have already heard; No one can tell you how beautiful you are, what you look like, what you feel about yourself. Your looks are entirely determined by how you feel. You already said your body shape is fine, but anything about your body is changeable - and without ridiculous wastes of money like plastic surgery, like some people think. Sometimes, you may need a little extra push in feeling more confident about how you look... A website with a random high-schooler giving you random advice based on life while trying to balance homework cannot provide that to you. What I can do is say, what do you not like about your face? Often, you don't need to change this - you just need to be proud. If you have a big nose, huge dimples, anything like that - don't be sad about it, think about ways that rude people don't make fun of it without changing it - like contouring perhaps? If your top lip disgusts you because it is so thin, just use a more peachy-toned lip color so it blends in more. The point is - don't be ashamed of what you have and what you were born with. You should show it off. But if people continue to give you a hard time about it, you might need a few little things to give yourself that extra boost of confidence. Do whatever you think you may need to fix whatever you don't like about your face, but at the end of the day, makeup or exfoliating is not really the answer. (But again, what do I know? I'm rubbish at makeup myself...) :')
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I recently nabbed a "free" chair from the curb, however, not before it got rained on, once. So since drying it out, I have noticed that the dye from the "embroidered" flowers in the upholstery has bled all over the seat, so obviously, I can't clean it with water, but it's very dirty, and there's a large stain on the front of the back. Does anyone know how I could safely clean this old chair without completely ruining it? Thank you in advance! (link)
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Try using the long, extendable hose-like part of your vacuum with a brush attachment to go over it and get rid of any dust/visible dirt before going in to repair the chair is a good place to start.
Also, if you have some spare time, checking to see if the chair is structurally sound before cleaning is a good idea. Is the wood cracked? Is there anything between the bottom of the chair legs and the floor to prevent unwanted scratches on hardwood? Does anything need to be tightened? These are normally fairly easy fixes, so do this before if you can.
To actually clean the chair, use/buy some a spray can of upholstery cleaner, which will normally also work for cleaning carpets. Something from Resolve/Triple Action/ArmorAll or any brand that makes this product is good. Always make sure to check the product's label for anything you might have any issues with before you make a purchase. Give the fabric a light spray with the product, making sure to not miss stains/crevices, then scrub with a clean cloth. When you're done, let the whole thing dry, since the cleaning spray has probably made it a just a little damp.
While it dries, feel free to do some work on the wood of the chair using a rubdown such as a wood polish/conditioner. Rub it on, let it soak, then wipe off the excess product.
Once everything is dry, go over any prominent stains if you wish. Your chair should definitely be cleaner than it was when you took it in! Feel free to vacuum it over again, and if all else fails, use a pillow, small throw blanket, or a faux sheepskin to hide anything that didn't come out while you were cleaning.
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My girlfriend and I are long distance. It's been nearly four months, and we recently just met. After a few weeks, our time of missing each other has gotten worse. We can't function, breakouts of random mood swings, and shut outs of people for days has changed us, and effected the way we live. We love each other, too much, and breaking up is never an option. We just need help on how to not kill ourselves over missing each other so much, thank you (link)
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First things first: if you're having serious suicidal thoughts, even just smaller ones because your day isn't going the way you want it to be, seek help in someone like a therapist. That being said, if they are just little half-thoughts you can probably overcome these obstacles yourself just by trying to take your mind off of what is bothering you.
Seeing that breaking up isn't an option, try modifying your lifestyle a little to make room for both your girlfriend and distracting yourself from this tough time with something like a hobby, if you have something else you are interested in. This will, besides distracted you from some negative thoughts, help you relax/sleep better from being active. Getting a week or so of 9 hours or so of rest will help get your mind off of these negative thoughts.
Of course, simple hobbies will not always work. Try turning these negative things into ones you can think about and not explode. For example, instead of thinking about how this long-distance relationship will never work out, and how you'll never find someone like her as long as you live, try thinking about how lucky you are to have someone like her as your girlfriend, and to think about this simple fact: change is good. Hanging on to the same old routine will make your life uninteresting. Although these feelings feel like they will never go away, they will in time. And by that, I don't mean waking up one morning to find your girlfriend has moved back, I mean gradually trying to focus on some better things and continuing to live your life like a kind, happy person who loves his girlfriend and who is not afraid of change. Stay strong through this.
If these feelings of death thoughts/unpredicatable mood swings continue for a while, or get worse/never cease, reaching out a family member/therapist/doctor is never a bad idea. These events may be causing a mild form of depression, something that is easy to fix when it first occurs with some help. But this is not much to worry about, since over 90% of depression-affected people recover over time, and that 10% will eventually find joy in life, as will you. Joy is a wonderful thing.
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