Hello, I'm here to give any sort of advice! Whether it is about something extremely personal or something general, I'll be here to answer any of your questions. I hope you enjoy my advice, but most importantly remember that the best advice you can get from anyone, is your own advice! Thanks for sharing your concerns and I hope I can help!
Gender: Female
Location: New York
Occupation: student
Age: 20
Member Since: May 21, 2009
Answers: 13
Last Update: May 24, 2009
Visitors: 2727
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13/f
so my friend Ahmad and I are pretty close although we've only known each other for about a year. I have felt a stronger connection with him before but have gotten over it. It continues like that currently still. So him, my bff jeff and i were sitting on my porch when we starting talking about relatioships and first kisses. Me and jeff already had our first kiss, but Ahmad said that he didnt and hasnt had a girlfriend since the 2nd grade, he's cute and sweet (like a teddy bear), but that's when i blabbed out that someone liked him. He was dying to know who. So later that nite he txted me begging to kno, two days later i finally told him. Now he wont even txt me back! Im afraid our friendship has ended. He's in 10th grade, im in 8th. Are we ever goin yo be the same.
i hope you can help-olie (link)
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Have you tried speaking to him yet? Maybe there's a reason why he stopped speaking to you. Either way it couldn't hurt to ask him what's up? And if we was ok?
You should just tell him how you feel. Maybe it's just a coincidence, and there's some other stuff going on either way it wouldn't hurt to try.
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Female.
So me and my boyfriend of 3 months broke up two weeks ago because he lied a lot and was just constantly drama. A couple days after that he was telling me he still loved me and wanted to get back together and he was depressed and missed me and i told him we needed to focus on moving on. So it took a couple days, but we decided we could be friends. So on the 5ht day after we broke up he told one of his friends he wanted me to die, that i was a bitch, and he hated me for ruining our relationship.
He acted like he didnt care about me in front of everybody and didn't even talk to me; which was fine because i quit texting him and talking to him also. But then he started sending me messages saything that he missed me and he was hiding his feelings at school but he still loved me and wanted me back. So a week and a half after we broke up, he started bringing pictures to school of this other girl. He said it was his girlfriend and that he was going to sneak her over to his house and spend some time together. This was only a week and half after we broke up. So i sent him a message saying, "Wow, you moved on fast!" He sent me one back saying he hadn't moved on, he just got a girlfriend to get over me.He said he still loved me and anytime i wanted him, he would drop his girlfriend and date me again.
Well i told him that i would never want to date him again and that i would never need him. Then he got really mad and told me not to talk to him anymore. But after that he kept sending me messages saying sorry and he wanted to talk to me but i ignored them all. I ignored him at school even when he wore a sign on his back that said "i have a hot ass girlfriend." But he would still send me messages saying i am gonna break up with her because it is to hard on me. I still love you so much.
So, i went out to the movies with two of my friends and he was there with his girlfriend and my mouth dropped open. So he mocked me when i did that. He got the satisfaction that he wanted. All of my friends that he had talked to say that he is only going out with her to make me mad and jealous. So when my mouth dropped open, and he mocked me doing it, he got the pleasure of knowing that i was jealous and suprised. Because, he told me he was breaking up with her. So he sends me a message right after i see him saying "Sorry you had to see that." I texted back and said "Aww, yall are so cute!" Then he said "Thanks, you looked really good, and please text me and not be mad." I said, "Well i told you to move on so i am not mad."
We were really close as a copule and thats why i am so shocked to see that he was with another girl only a week and a half after we broke up. The first few days after we broke up, he would send me voicemails crying and would be very depressed. But then this happens. At school, he acts like he dosen't care and dosen't talk to me. But after school, it's a different story.
So after tonight, he saw that i was jealous. I try eveyday to act like i don't care and get on with my life. But it is SO HARD. I always find myself looking at him wondering how he could get a girlfriend so quick but at the same time, texting me and telling me he hasn't moved on. And he told me he was going to break up with her but he never did. So now, i don't know how to act. I always act like i don't care but it was so satisfying for him letting me see him with his new girlfriend. I am not texting him anymore and i don't want him to think i care. If he loves me why would he be with her even if he is trying to make me jealous? I am confused. Please let me know what to do. Thanks! (link)
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I'd love to tell you what to do :), unfortunately I'm not you, so I can only give you this advice.
Love is a deep and huge confusing thing. One minute you think you love someone and the next minute you don't.
When you like someone, it's hard to let them go. But you have to remember, in the end you must choose what's best for you.
Is this relationship really worth it? Was it great when you were dating? And does his actions feel like loving actions?
It seems your ex, has given you allot to think about. I notice you said that he has given you allot of drama before, that's why you broke up. But it looks like he's still giving you drama after the break up.
Also if he is dating another girl to get you jealous, it doesn't seem that he's sincere with his feelings. Nor is it fair to the other girl. Wearing shirts around you, ignoring you, and mocking you in public isn't exactly the right way to show love.
It also must be extremely hard for you because you let him go, and he's constantly throwing it back in your face. This isn't mature, nor is it helping the situation at all.
You also don't want to be the reason why he broke up with another girl. It's not fair to you nor the other girl.
If he truly does love you, then that's great, but he's not doing a good job of showing it.
You have a choice to make: You can either get back together with him. Have him break up with that girl, and allow him to have two girls fight over him.
Or you can choose to remove yourself from the situation, and stop texting him.
It's good that your trying not to give him any satisfaction. Remeber your worth true love, and you're better then all this drama.
But in the end you have to do what you think is best. Will getting back together be good decision? Or will it be a mistake?
Good luck and Best wishes, and I hope this helps.
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At the end of the movie "Identity", what is the song
that Paris is singing as she's driving in her truck
in the orchids or whatever.
Cheers. (link)
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http://www.moviemusic.com/soundtrack/identity
I've never seen the movie, but if you own it, at the end of the credits lists every single song in order of them appearing in the movie. That might help. Also above is the link to the movie soundtrack with each song title listed. The last songs on the soundtrack is "No second chance" and "end credits".
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18/F
i have bulemia and iv been battling it on and off for quite some time now,, it comes and goes. and i havent got help for it before, but last time i had it really bad my family knew about it.
i cant eat around anyone atm but when im with my dad or sister [[any family member]] i eat so they doesnt notice but then i just throw up. and when im by myslef i can eat.. like i dnt eat anything and then i just binsge eat and throw up,, mainly because i cant stop myself from eating to much.
how do i eat a little bit and stop myself from eating so i dnt over eating and throw up,, like i no if i eat a little bit then it will be easier to keep down but i just keep eating to the point where i make myself sick. im really trying to control this but its so hard.
my friend who knows [one friend] gets disapointed in me when i cant eat around her. but she just doesnt know how hard it is... i know i need help but im so scared of getting help. wat should i do?? (link)
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First, I am so sorry for what you're going through, and respect and admire you for recognizing that you do indeed have a disorder. You're an extremely brave young girl.
An eating disorder is the hardest thing to battle because it's you fighting against yourself. Your brain is telling you the opposite of what is true because it's under pressure. The best way to relieve that pressure is to resort to throwing up. Your brain thinks your doing the best thing for yourself. That's what makes it so hard.
I'm sorry to say this and leave you with no options, but you must get help. If you don't you could end up in the hospital or dieing. Your family seems very supportive, and willing to stick by your side. Your friend seems truly worried, and doesn't want you to end up hurt. Please seek professional attention. This is hard, and I have no place to tell you what's right and what's wrong, but I do know that an eating disorder can consume you and everyone around you that you love. I do know that allot of people with bulimia have issues with self control, and use food to control themselves.
It's hard to battle on your own, and I'm so sorry that you�re going through this. But please, be brave and seek medical attention. It can only help you, into being a healthier person that can help others in this similar situation.
Again I'm sorry, best wishes and hopes, and I know you're a strong enough girl to do the right thing.
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Hello again, and thank you for the rating :)!
It's perfectly normal to feel scared about something like this. I would be too!
The reason for the fear: Think of it this way, the disorder you have is, unfortunately, apart of you. It has to do with something deep inside you. You�re physically acting out what your feeling.
In a way you're allowing professionals to probe inside your own feelings, child hood, and bad memories. Also you are trying to change. Change is scary, especially if it means you'll have to break a bad habit. That's why you're scared.
You also don't want to be judged, and let this label who you are, which it won't! It is all normal to feel scary. So don't worry about being scared.
To combat fear: You have realize, you are not alone! You have to tell yourself,� this is only for now, it's not forever. I can do this, and this will no longer control who I am." Repeat it, and feel it. Because it's the truth. You can do this! You are not alone, you have family and friends backing you up, and the people who are going to help you are going to do their best. Don't be scared you're not alone. :)!
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i truly liked this guy,"S", from this semester. in the beginning,he was quiet and didn't talk much, but as the semester progressed, he opened up, especially to me, about things like his hobbies, future goals, what he did this weekend and personal stuff.based on his reserved character, i thought b/c he reveals so much of himself to me, he may possibly like me.there are other details too but for the sake of keeping it short i won't write them out. nearing the end of the semester though it gets wierd b/c he asked to study with me alone, and that's when you exchange numbers to coordinate the time better,as well as other advantages *hint* *hint*,and it's an awkward moment and he says "well you have my email,hopefully you'll find me there." that day i ran into our study group friends and they came with me to study with S, but I saw S's face light up when he saw me regardless. and after finals when everyone had finished, we were all talking in a group, and he asks me if i'm done for the day, i said yes. then he says he has to go study(it's a friday), looks at me with a final "have a nice summer", and leaves. i'm crushed. i thought he liked me back.the more we talked, the more i found how much in common we have, and the more i grew attracted to his character.i can't even express how i've felt this past week since school ended.it's like all those talks we had evaporated with the beginning of summer. why would he bother talking and joking around with me so much if he didn't like me? i almost wish he hadn't-i wouldn't have known how great a guy he is.i don't want to make a move, i once asked a guy out and it was a disaster i'll never do it again, but i don't know what to do.i know i didn't do anything wrong, usually i can almost always find something i've done or said that was wrong or immature, but this time i can't.it's hard to consider moving on right now, but if anyone can help me out with what to do i'd really appreciate it. thank you for taking the time to read this. (link)
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The first solution is YOU DID NOT DO ANYTHING WRONG! If you were true to yourself while speaking to him, then you were fine! Don't feel bad, anyone could feel hurt and confused over this situation.
I know it could be hard asking him out or confronting him on the situation, but if you really care about this situation enough, even though you were crushed that last time, it might help you to understand things a little bit more. I know it's hard to get over feelings of pain and rejection. No one like’s confronting those feelings! The thing is, rejection it apart of the romantic life. That's what makes acceptance such a great feeling! It might hurt you to hear that he doesn't like you, but maybe he does and he's too afraid to ask you. Maybe he's waiting for you to ask him out, because he seems like a shy guy. But I truly think you should speak to him. Don't ask him out, bluntly, just share your feelings. The only bad thing that can come out of it, is that you get reflected, but its better then torturing yourself by wondering.
But don't worry, I'm pretty sure that it will all work out for the best. :)
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I'm 16 years old and work at a tiny little farmer's market. There's this guy that I work with that just started who's so nice and smart and funny :) Anyway.......
I have such a big crush on him. I was wondering if you think I should go for it, even though I work with him?
It also may be important to note that he's my boss's son.
I just would like some opinions here. Thanks! (link)
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It's great that you're working with someone you really have a crush on because it's easier to get to know them. The problem with being a teenager, and having a boyfriend you have to work with, is that there's more then a 50% chance you're going to break up, because it's normal.
The Con's: He is your boss's son. If you break up you have to ask yourself, what will the boss think? He might not care, then again, he might take it out on you. How awkward would it be if we did break up? Could this affect my job, or performance? How could this effect him? If we are still dating but getting into a fight, and you have to work together that day or the next, will it be hard?
But that's only on the negative!
On the bright side: You might stay dating for the rest of your high school career, and never have to worry about that other stuff. You might get a different job while you're still dating, or if you do break up it will be on mutual terms.
Remember that whatever your choice is, it will be an awesome learning experience for the future. If it takes a turn for the worst, it might not matter. It probably shouldn�t matter; the only problem is it does, because you are in a professional facility.
But also confront him with your feelings and ask him what he feels. What he thinks you guys should do. That might narrow down a few of the possibilities :)
Good Luck!
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http://www.alibaba.com/
I would like to buy something from this site. Has anyone ever used it? Can you tell if it is a legitimate site? Is it like e-bay or something? Thank you for the advice. (link)
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http://www.xomreviews.com/alibaba.com
I haven't used this website personally, but here's the link that shows you personal reviews on the website. This might allow you to make your own assumption if the site is legit or not. But be careful. The reviews are really mixed, some people love it and others hate it.
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ohkay soo for my birthday which is in like less than a month I am getting my belly button pierced, but I want to loose my fat on my stomach and make it hard. What would be your exercise routine you would give me? I'm not like fat just my stomach is like a little bit big. (link)
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I suggest healthy eating, and avoiding things with too many carbohydrates, sugars, and salt. Substitute a pack of starburst, for some strawberries. Substitute some Ben and Jerry�¢ï¿½ï¿½s ice-cream for a homemade banana and low fat frozen yogurt shake. Go with organic foods instead of cheaper foods that have more toxins in them. Avoid Soft Drinks, especially ones that contain caffeine and Vitamin Water, it bloats you more then anything.
Holding your stomach in is an exercise within itself. Try to hold it in all day, and only relax it when you're going to sleep. Other then that sit ups and crunches are the most obvious exercises. Try to do ten crunches then ten sit-ups every morning before breakfast. Then the next day go for twenty...thirty, and so on. Running, Yoga and holding your stomach in while lifting 10lbs. weights with your legs can also have great results.
Avoid diet pills, diet food substitutes and, laxatives.
Good Luck! Hope the piercing looks great!!!
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The differnce between sit ups and crunches is, sit ups you're using your body to pull your upper half all the way to meet your knees.
Crunches you're sorta on the floor curled up in a ball, and you're not trying to go all the way up. Your legs are off the ground and your simply trying to crunch. Be carefull when you put your hands behind your head, it might cause straining. Try to do it lightly.
Here's a great link to show you how to do cruches perfectly:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKg_cdwq9l4
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I use to date this boy about 2 years ago and we dated for about 4 months. Then I broke up with him and he still liked me and he still liked me for 1 1/2 years after the break-up. Every now and then I would go back and have a little thing with him, but I would always end it because for some reason I just started not liking him. Then we got in a big big big fight and he never wanted to talk to me again and he started dating another girl. Then he broke up with her and started talking to me again and telling me that he wanted to be friends again. I had liked him at this point and even before he started talking to me again. And I told him that and he said that he didn't want to date anyone right now. But he never gives me any signs that he still likes me...what should I do. (link)
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You have to give him some space right now. It was great that you shared your feelings with him, but he said he didn't want to be in a relationship. It sucks, because you still like him, but you have to respect what he wants. Once he sees that you aren't pushing anything, he might want to take things further.
But before you jump back into a relationship; him not wanting to be in a relationship might be the best thing for you and him right now. You can figure why you broke up in the first place, find out more things about each other that you didn't know before, and maybe gain some perspective before you decide anything yet.
Simply concentrate on being a really good friend to him. Maybe the relationship he was in before really messed him up. He has to show you his true feelings in his own time. All you can do is be there for him.
I'm sure everything will work out :).
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So my boyfriend is going to be gone for a few months and i am not going to be able to see him. So i want to substitute to get me by till then i am not sure what is good? please help (link)
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Good substitutes for helping you deal with your bf going away for a few months can be really easy.
If you mean on a sexual level, this could actually benefit your relationship more then hurt it. The farther away from each other you are the more interesting the temptations will be. Phone sex is always an option, or you could always go to shop that could be selling something on the lines of what you might be looking for: Vibrators. There are different types, and those are very good sexual substitutes.
If you’re talking about things you could do on a more one-on-one time with yourself. It all comes down to what you enjoy. Whether it be joining a yoga class. Having a girl’s night in every Friday night. Reading a really good book. Joining a society or club that can help others, like a soup kitchen. Going back to concentrating on a hobby, like scrap booking, painting, or writing.
Either way you'll be able to feel a little less lonely without him being physically there.
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so say im spotting or w.e it is right now and i want to take a prego test would it not work....? and im wondering ive started the pill a month ago and i have been getting realllly irreuglar periods lke ive got it no like every week three days very light then not at all for five days then at the end of the week i did light again and now i got it again and itslike kinda heavier and its been like two days now its lil thou so... whats that? (link)
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Yes, you can still take a pregnancy test while still on birth control.
Light spotting can be extremely scary, especially if it's irregular. I suggest you go to a gynecologist, and make an appointment A.S.A.P. The spotting could mean that you may have ovarian cists. BUT DO NOT PANIC YET. It may just be the birth control you're on. You might just have to simply switch over.
Take a pregnancy test just to be safe then make an appointment with a gynecologist. If you don't know of any gynecologists, your doctor can refer you to someone.
Other then that, try to stay calm. It could be nothing serious. Just make that appointment!
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My boyfriend and I [of almost a year] broke up about nine months ago. Recently, he showed up and asked for another chance. He was truly my first love, so of course, I gave him another chance. We weren't taking things slow physically, but mentally, I refused to get attached to him, because I knew how easily he can change his mind.
Long story short, he's been with another girl this whole time (I knew this), and when I told him that he couldn't have both of us and that he had to choose- he chose her. I was mad about this, but I had been waiting for it to happen again since he showed up a month or two ago, so I'm alright.
My problem is that: I'm homeschooled. I only started homeschooling a year or so ago, so I have plenty of female friends that go to every high school in town, but I don't have many guy friends anymore. Most of the guys I knew in school were more like acquaintences, so we haven't kept up... either that, or they liked me and I wasn't interested in them, so they stopped talking to me.
Summer's coming up, and I don't want to be alone for it. Next year I'm going to be a senior in high school, so I know it's going to be tough doing everything alone. I want to be more of a people person, and I want new boys to like me, and want to hang out.
I'm always too nervous/weirded out by talking to people that live in my own city, online, and I feel like they're creeped out by talking back to me.
=/ Any ideas, please?
(link)
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Being alone is always a hard thing to deal with. The best thing about the feeling of being alone is that realistically you really aren't. The great thing about being alone is figuring more and more about yourself. Senior year is coming up, and colleges are a big deal Senior year so in that sense you won't have to worry about the hole big "what's going to happen between me and my boyfriend" deal, with whatever choice you choose in the future. But also Prom and Graduation parties can be tuff when you don't have anyone special to share it with.
Being nervous and weirded out by talking to people is something easily curable. The Cure is trying to learn how to be yourself with people. If they can't accept you for who you are, then forget them. But you do have female friends, so you know you're not a weird person. Online, is not exactly the best place to make new friends, because people are overly cautious for obvious reasons. Community events, parties and school clubs are the best way to meet new people. Tell your girl friends you'd like to meet some guys, bring up conversations that include things you know, hobbies and things you have in common. The great thing about meeting new people is figuring out more and more things about you. So just think of it as, you're not trying to get them to know you, you're trying to get to know yourself.
But remember you could be in a crowd full of people and still feel like a social outcast. The situation is simply mind over matter. But I think you'll be fine! Remember being yourself is really what matters most and knowing that sometimes when you're alone you can actually have the most fun ;).
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i am a straight male that likes to wear pantyhose is this normal (link)
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Well the real question should be...what is "normal"? Every person has their own opinion on that. Some people may say that wearing pantyhose is normal. Some people may say it isn't. I say, if it feels right, and you aren't hurting anyone in your life, then what you do in your private time is your business, and no one has a right to comment on that.
I believe what you may be referring to "cross dressing". Cross dressing has been done before, and is a common fact existing in the world since the beginning of time. It is actually very common for a straight male to be a cross dresser. This does not mean you are a homosexual, unless you have feelings towards the opposite sex. It simply means you like to where pantyhose. That's your business. But if you are married or in a relationship I think it would be wise to tell them that you like to where pantyhose. There are books on cross dressing if you are interested you could simply look online or in a nearby book store, if you think you need to speak to someone about this you could always go where it feels safe whether it's a family member or a counselor. Remember in reality there is no such thing as normal :).
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