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July 3, 2005Answers:
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June 8, 2006Visitors:
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therocketsummer
askmex3
about
Hey, my name's Kathleen, you can call me kata or kat. I set up this advice column because I think giving advice is a great way to help out people with their problems, and it's also a way to help myself with struggles as a grow more and more into the real world. So just know that if you have any problems, concerns, questions, or struggles, ask me and i'll be sure to help you out. I'll answer your questions as best and as quick as i possibly can!
advice
How do I tell my boyfriend that I have AIDS. He wants to have sex with me but I don't know a good way to tell him..help?
wow, this is really serious. you have to just be straight up with him. it's now or never, if you wait too long it might be late.
just say something like, "i have a serious problem that i have to tell you so please, just be considerate.. i have AIDS."
best of luck
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
i need a new hairstyle like im sooo sick of the one i have now, which ive had for like everr.
my hair is about shoulder length,maybe a little past,brown, i have an oval shaped face but not a extremely large forehead.lol. i was really leading to like sidebangs but idk how that would look..if anyone has any ideas what i could do with my hair i'd appreciate it :] pictures would be nice too so i can bring it in when i get it cut.thankss =]
sidebangs are really cute. nothing too dramatic though. maybe add some layers, or angles, even highlights are a nice option too, but i'm not saying it's necessary.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
today, the kid i like said he was moving. so i started crying like crazy. (he already knows i like him) but he was just kidding. now i made an idiot out of myself and his friends will tell him and they'll laugh at me. he probably did to because he knew that i would cry. what should i do?
let's see, guys can be a little un-emotional at times, trust me, i've seen it all. but, if you cried, then you showed him that you really care about him, and you don't want to loose him. casually move on. i mean, there's not much to help the problem. the guy you like should understand. just play it cool the next time you see him, and don't think about it in such a bad way.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
ok well at my high school every grade gets a class shirt. and we need to put a saying on it. well im the class of 2010 and i was wondering if anyone had nay ideas of a cute saying that we could put on the shirt? thanks
2010, it's been a blast.
but now we're cheering, out at last!
that's the best i could come up with, idk if it helps. by the way- i'm part of the graduating class of 2010 too.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
i think im fat. but i dont really look fat. whats a girl whos almost thirteen supposed to weigh??? (I'm almost 5 feet.)
try using a BMI calculator, here`s an example i found on the internet: [you could also try searching google "BMI calculator" and there will be plenty of other choices of calculators, but they all do the same thing..]
http://www.asbs.org/html/bmi.html
check out this website, and put the most accurate answers and you`ll be sure to get a good and accurate see of where you fall under the categories of Underweight, Normal, Overweight, Obese, etc.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
I just finished seventh grade. i thought i was going to hate it but i loved it. I really miss it. Now im really scared to go to eigth. I mean like.. what if its hard? what if i become stupid all of a sudden? what if no one wants to be my friend anymore????????????? i wish i was still in seventh grade. I dont wanna grow up :-(
-p.s. ..its me lynnie :-)
haha, heyy! urghhh.. lynn, 8th grade is just like 7th grade just slightly harder. but from knowing you, i really, really, really think that N0NE of the things you said is really gunna happen to you. you`re like super smart so i doubt you`ll just get stupid all of a sudden.. and you have like a million billion friends and they`re not just gunna stop liking you, and i mean, face the facts, you just gotta keep on growing up, there`s no way to really stop. yeahh, i do agree, i too am gunna miss those 7th grade memories.. but, hey, it`s time to start new 8th grade memories!
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
**have great summer =]
I have this friend (or so i thought) who I am very close with. But i have a feeling that this isn't true friend ship. she always shows off in front of me and tries to make me feel jealous. whenever i'm at her house she always ignores me. also, she always tries to compete. if i get a nice gift or win a cool prize she will just go and get the same thing ten times better. I'm getting pretty sick of her and I don't know what to do. Also, she never trusts a thing I say. I'm beginning to think this isn't true friendship. How about you?
well, i don`t think that it is a true friendship, like you said. A true friend wouldn`t show off in front of you, ignore you, or try to make you feel lower than her.. if this is how she really acts towards you, then maybe this friendship has to come to an end? if i had a friend who did that to me, personally, i wouldn`t take that, it`s insulting, it says that she`s not a respectful and caring to you. So yeahh, i guess i`d just end my friendship with her. but..... if that`s too over the edge, then the next best thing might be to talk to her. ask he what`s her problem if she thinks she can act that way, you know?
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
hi kata. well i just turned 11 like a week ago and i dance a lot and i play sports. the last time i went to dance, i noticed i started to "smell". wat deodorant has the best smell and one that doesn't leave white on your shirts and armpits and plus which is good for girls my age???? thank you very much!
Well the two good deodorants that i recommend are Teen Spirit Stick and Arrid Total.
haha, but that`s just me! =D
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
i came to you because ive seen your page and you are excellent at giving advice. so i have this problem. i dont know if its little or big. my self esteem is so low. i feel fat, ugly, stupid, and i feel like everyone around me is so much better than me. sometimes i feel like i have to go out of my way to feel good about myself, but then someone else does it so much better. do you know any good ways to increase self esteem?
http://www.mentalhealthrecovery.com/art_selfesteem.html
*this website really says all i have to say. just skip to the part where it says "Take Good Care of Yourself"
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
well i have to siblings...i am the middle child...they all do stuff together n it seems like they dont need me...i dont no wut i should do.
of course your siblings need you. it might not seem like they do, but trust me.. they do. i can`t say from experience, seeing as i`m an only child, but having many cousin`s to learn from, i`ve seen their actions and what they do when things like this happen. try to talk to them more often. plan a day to spend together with just them, by going to the movies, or to the mall or something. just hang around them more often, and be more kind to them. forget sibling rivalry, because that just pushes you guys further away from each other. as long as your more active together, then i`m sure you`ll be right back in with your siblings.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
hey!
okay i have a weird question...
my best friend is gay..he is atracted too my brother! and he has a lot of problems his parents dont except gay people should he kill himself ?...or should he move? hes siting rite next too me..
thanks,
michael + melanie xOo0oooooooox
uhmm.. let`s see, well i really don`t see any shame to have to do something as drastic as killing yourself because your parents don`t accept gay people.. just live life as is. i`m not for gay people either, but uhmm.. what ever, as long as you`re happy?
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
Hey my names diana and i go too hauppauge middle school. i dont have many friends and the ones that i think are my friends avoid me :-( what should i do??
thanks doll face
well, personally, what i would do, is to try and find out why they would avoid me. Am i too talkative? is there something wrong with the way i dress? you could ask yourself those questions, but a better way would be to get feedback from your friends. Ask them to answer them honestly and not to hold back on anything. Yes, their answers may hurt, but it`s the only true way to fix yourself and maintain and possibly gain your friends. After you get your feedback from them, fix your problems. If you seem to be too talkative or annoying, then do a little less talking. If you are too bossy, let someone else take a stand during a project or something. Once other people start seeing the new way of your actions, then i`m sure that they`ll regret avioding you.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
*if all else fails, find new friends =D lol
Hey
i have a boyfriend and were very very serious about each other. He wants too have sex and i do too. i just dont know how too do it my mom died and never had that talk with me. My boyfriend is not a virgin so i dont want too be embarrassed have you ever had sex? can you give me some ideas on how we could do it? im 16...ThanKs ;-)
xOo0ox
well.. i`m sorry but i can`t say much cause i don`t have any personal experience yet. but just from thinking, i guess that i can`t really tell you how to do it and stuff either, because it`s really up to you and your boyfriend, you know? it`s your personal business, do it however you want. whatever happens, happens.
i`m soo sorry i couldn`t help!
xo0x- Kata
im 16 and my boyfriend just proposed weve been together for 8 years i love him he is a drop out and i will be soon. my parents are dead. (crack) he seems like my ONLY future and the only one who cares for me i am pregnant but not with him ..i cheated once hehe girls gotta do waht a girls gotta do xOooo0x
PLEASE i really am so confused xOoo0x
okayy, whoaa?!? sorry, i`m still trying to soak this all in. ok, you`re 16, you and your boyfriend have been together for 8 years and he just proposed to you.. he`s a drop-out, and you will be one too soon. both of your parents are dead from crack.. you`re pregnant but not with him.. ok. whoaa, goshh.. the first and most important thing i have to say is.. what is wrong with you!? you`re practically throwing your life away by dropping out of school for your boyfriend and being pregnant and all that. and no, he can`t be the ONLY future. why not finish up high school, and go to college, get a job, then marry? and there`s probably tons of people that care about you, close relatives, friends.. doing what you`re doing now is not the answer, okay? goshh, you gotta talk to someone a.s.a.p!! a close relative would be the best choice. you have to tell them all about your life.. and the struggles that you`re going through.. you can`t go on living your life the way it is now.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
All my friends are so much prettier and skinnier than me, and it lowers my self esteem. They are always the ones that get all the guys attention, and I hardly get any. I know it shouldnt matter at all, but it still bothers me. My friends dont treat me badly or anything, but im always worried that they are secretly thinking lower of me. Any suggestions on how to quit becoming so jealous and to stop thinking Im not good enough for my friends?
lose those friends, if that`s how they treat you, then what good friends are they? I mean, no one deserves friends that make you feel lower than them. Personally, i`d just ditch `em, even if we were friends forever, or if we were always together, i`d just forget about them.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
hey!!
okay im confused i told my girlfriend jill i loved her...and she will never say i love you back and it bothers me weve been together 4 three years..and she still wont
from,
mike...
ok mike, well if she`s really not saying i love you to you anymore, then maybe you should talk to her about this. Ask her what`s going on with her, and why she`s not as passionate as she was before. [if she ever was..] maybe to start to get things going again, take her on a date or give her a nice present. If none of these things work, and if she`s still not fired up, i guess the best thing to do might probably be to end this relationship. I mean, what`s a relationship without the love?
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
okay im going out with someone 2 years younger then me what do i do??!!!! he doesnt know im 2 years older he thinks im his age :-(
Well, why don`t you just start off by saying the truth. Everyone deserves the truth. Tell him that you`re really 2 years older than him, and if he`s one of those sweet guys, then i`m sure he should understand and except the truth from you. Although, not to bring down on the good news but, it`s not always that way. He might not forgive you for what you did, and you guys might end up breaking up. But i mean, as long as you tell the truth, it`s all good. But really the rest of your love life with him is just really up to him, you know?! if he forgives you or not.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
okay hi my names daniella and im 12...my friend and i were playing a joke on this kidd "ben" taht she met on a cruise she told him i was 10 like him and single the kid lives in oklahoma and i live in cali. he said he really really likes me now and he wants too meet me the problem is i have been living A lie i am 13...and i lied about my age and went on with it this is really tough now i really like him too but he thinks im someone else and not who i really am what should i do?...thanks daniella
ok, i think that the best thing to do would be to tell him the truth. He deserves the truth. Tell him everything you just told me. Tell him that you`re really 13 not 10.. and most likely he`ll accept your apology, or at least i think he should. So just start off by telling him the truth about you, who you really are.
hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
dear kata
i go to a school full of streotypes and they all like hip hop wear the hottest shoes out,so do i but i,ve gained an intrest in punk like blink 182 ,the killers ,my chemecial romance,and many more.so at school i would be singing them songs and people would be giving me looks like what is she doing.i am an inspring rapper and i like to experiment with other music.i just want them to except the fact i like diffrent types of music.should i let go of my friends or let go of the music.
**thanx**
well, if this music is something you really love, and you`re really dedicated to it, then i don`t see why you should give it up. It`s who you are, and if other people can`t seem to understand and except that, then you shouldn`t be blaming yourself, it`s their fault. I don`t think that you should give up anything. Don`t change yourself to make others happy, or to fit in. you are who you are. you can keep the friends you have, just ignore their dirty looks, and be yourself.
i hope this helps!
xo0x- Kata
hi again..this the one with the cousin problem...well okay my cousin's crush which is my crush too, always seems to flirt with me asking questions do you have a boyfriend, did you have your first kiss, who do you have a crush on, and other stuff...does that mean he might like me? i mean we never saw each other we only speak online...a lot..
i`m soo sorry it took me a little while to answer your question, my computer hasn`t been the greatest lately..
ok. let`s see, well if he`s constantly asking you questions about your love life, then he must be very curious, and most likely has an interest in you.. i think? well i mean, i would think that he likes you because, a guy would not be asking questions like "do you have a boyfriend" or "did you have your first kiss" etc. so yes.. he most certainly likes you.
xo0x- Kata