about

I'm a college student majoring in political science and pre-law, I like to read and paint, I like to think I've been through my fair share of experiences, some good, some bad, and when answering questions, I particularly pick out ones to answer that are similar to a situation I've been through myself because lets face it, the best advice always comes from someone who's been there!

advice

I'm a 42 y/o single man. Less then a month ago my best friend died in an accident. I have not been able to come to grips with his death. I have recently been having thoughts of ending my life. This happens whenever I am alone, especially at night. I have lost loved ones before, including my parents and brother all within a year of each other, but I never felt this type of despair, or loneliness. I am afraid I may eventually give in to my suicidal urge. Can anyone help me?

when you think about suicide, think about the people in your life that you could be putting in the exact same position that you are in right now from losing you. I know the last reason anyone contemplating suicide to avoid it is that you will "hurt everyone you care about", but from someone who's lost a friend to suicide- ponder this:

When you take your own life, yours is not the only life you are taking. Years after the incident, I'm still wondering when I will stop being so angry for a friend to take himself away from me. Don't make someone you care about as hurt and as angry as someone like I am.

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okay my friend and i were wondering "does you cherry pop if you use tampons?"

It's not a sure thing, but it's pretty common. Same with sports, lots of activities will do it. It's totally normal.

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Yeahh okay im 14/f, im not to young so dont even say that cause im about to be 15. Dont worry!
So like im not saying i want it to happen, like having sex. But sometimes it just happens, and I want to be prepared. Because me and this guy were making out like A LOT on the floor and like he started to unzip my pants and stuff, but I have MORALS! I told him not to. But like even if I wanted to go for it, like idk if Im ready. Like in the emotinal since and like physically because im not on birth control : which im really scared to ask my mom about, and I didnt have a condom, like I know he may have had one but I wouldve felt better if I carried them too : which I would feel very embarassed about buying.

So what I really am asking advice about it is:
-How do I know Im ready?
-How do I tell my mom I might need birth control?
-How do I find a way to be more comfortable buying condoms?

In general how do I protect myself! lol

Thank you for reading this long piece of crap :]]

I have to applaud your willingness to lay that out and look for advice on being ready. BUT- age, and anything else regardless, neither I, nor ANY of these other people can tell you that you are or are not ready. Sucks! But ultimately it is YOUR choice, and don't let other people use shallow facts to decide for you. As far as figuring it out for yourself, sex isn't much different from most decisions you make. You're obviously not stupid, you realize all sorts of consequences as well as benefits. It can be a really awesome, or a really terrible thing. One of the main factors you didn't include was the WHO. Just look at it at all angles. If you don't know the answer to a question you have, find it. (not health stuff here, look on a planned parenthood or other legit website) Look at all your possible outcomes, and decide what you can and cannot live with. As for the other two, be as honest with your mom as you were here. Explain how you feel, that it doesn't mean you're for sure, but you want facts and you want to be prepared. Even if she gets upset, she might have words of wisdom for you (gross! i know!). And hey, there are very few people out there comfortable with buying condoms, it's always uncomfortable to reveal something so personal to a total stranger (i.e. basically telling the cashier "yes! i have sex!) To correct some of the other advice you got, YES, sometimes it DOES just happen. Anyone that tells you it's easy to decide when and where and with who obviously isn't aware of what a real sex life means. So don't ever ever ever think you don't need to ask these questions. Being able to recognize the fact that you need some answers to make a decision is a VERY mature thing to do. Good luck, you are the only one that can decide if you are ready!

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can you get pregnant if you have sex while on your period??

It's definitely not a from of birth control and generally the answer is yes. But, ovulation isn't random. You ovulate sometime within a span of 3 days exactly 2 weeks into your cycle (of 4 weeks) So if you're asking as birth control, the answer is yes, and you need another form, but if you has unprotected sex and are worried about pregnancy, your risk is lower than when not on your period.

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Im 17, I started having sex 2 years ago. I now have a different boyfriend and we've been together for a year now. I started taking birth control over the summer and recently we stopped using condoms but I've still been taking my pills. Recently it started to hurt during sex, like a hard pushing or stabbing feeling. Then I started bleeding while having sex and that has only happened 3 times and not every time we do it. Then the pain just kept getting worse and now we haven't had sex in a while because I don't want it to hurt. I've been really worried about it. And now my period is 5 days late. What is wrong with me?

It's true that it's abnormal. But, there are a couple simple explanations. Condoms usually come with lubricant on them, so switching off of them can be hard to adjust to. Also, check out all the info you can about YOUR pill. Carefully look at some side effects. It could be s small urinary tract infection or yeast infection too. More than likely, it would be any of those things because they are pretty common, but if you check out your pill info and it doesn't seem to match, definitely see a doctor. Don't panic, there are a billion things it could be. If it's pregnancy you're worried about, nothing you listed really describes some common warning signs.

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a day ago i had sex with my gf and we had a little foreplay and she masturbated me and i got wet with some fluid(precum) then we had sex while i was putting on a condom first i put it on opposite side because of lights were off and then the back to the other side. i just read from the condom instruction that i should use a new condom if i put it on opposite. i didn't know back then. what are the chances???

is been a day, does pill help??? any other help that can increase my chance of being safe??

thnx for advice

Agreed about the Plan B pill. If you aren't 18, ask someone who is to buy it for you, or call a local planned parenthood. As for the "chances" it's something you need to discuss with your girlfriend, she knows her body and can tell you when she had her last period, ect. Typically, there is a window of 2 or 3 days exactly two weeks after she gets her period where she can become pregnant, so she's really the only one who can asses how at risk you are. As for in the future, yes the pill can help, but condoms are highly effective when used correctly (it's totally okay to slip up, but talk it out before hand about the back up plans) Generally, it's a low risk, people tend to blow it far more out of proportion. I know it's scary but the best thing to do is to keep calm and talk everything through with your girlfriend

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