Q: Here's my situation:
My girlfriend wants me to give her a ride to school, because it gets cold up in our parts, and her car sits outside, so its always frosted over and unless she catches a ride with her mom, or leaves early on the bus, its impossible for her to get there. She hates the bus because the little kids on it are annoying and some mornings, her mom leaves early for work, so she can't catch a ride.
Giving her rides really isn't a problem for me, but it is for my Sister. She's 4 years younger than me, and it just seems impossible for her to get ready on time for me to pick up my girlfriend when she wants to be picked up. I tell her every night before she needs to get ready on time, and I still end up badgering her every morning to get out of the bathroom and on the road. If i try to talk to her about it on our way to school, she never listens. She acts way more immature than she really is (shes 14) and makes noises so she can't hear what im trying to tell her. Sometimes it frusturates me so much i threaten to drop her off right there wherever i am on my way to school (i have kicked her out a couple times and made her walk an extra few hundred feet to get there, (we live 10 miles away, so she's getting off easy)). She won't let me talk to her and she never learns the hard way. If she says anything to me its just whiny BS about how I do too much stuff for my girlfriend, and don't pay any attention to what anyone else [she] wants.
Of course, the obvious thing to try to do is talk to my dad about it, and ask him to enforce my sister's actions. But i've tried this and every time it happens she goes to him and whines about how she doesn't have her way, and always gets it her way. I've tried to make her ride the bus, I tell him its only fair that she rides the bus (just like I did when i was her age), and she whines and makes everyone's life hell for a while, and my dad just decides its easier to make me give her a ride instead of putting up with my sister, and I really can't blame him.
So all I'm really left with is to make my girlfriend wait for me to get there, or tell her i'll be too late to give her a ride. Every morning I do this, she basically ignores or crabs at me all day at school, and we always end up arguing about it that night on the phone. Since it's happening so often lately, Our relationship is really suffering. All she does is argue with me because I can't be there for her. and all I can say is that I'd be there for her if it wasn't for my sister. We never talk about anything exept my bitchy sister, and she asks me every morning if i can give her a ride and every night I lie and say ill be able to, just to make her feel alright, and so we dont have to spend more of the night arguing about it. Then every morning I end up banging on my sister's bathroom door, end up too late to pick my girlfriend up and get crabbed at all day in school and arguing with her every night.
Its just a terrible cycle that has kept going and going and getting worse and worse as it gets colder outside. I feel like i can yell and threaten my sister, kick and scream for my dad to make her listen and still never get any better off. Tonight on the phone, i was in tears trying to get my girlfriend to stop arguing about my sister and there was pure silence for like 2 minutes, then i asked if she was still there, and she just kept going on about how I don't have the guts to get what I want, how I can't get my sister to do what she wants me to make her do. I hung up. and havent heard from her in 2 hours.
And I think about how easy it would be for just one of them to change their habits and how hard it is for me to put up with them both. I just want to be a boyfriend for my girlfriend, but that doesn't stop the fact that my sister has to be my friend too, I really do get along with her when i'm not trying to make a point with her. And I am simply not the kind of person who can stand holding grudges against someone else, especailly someone as close as my girlfriend or sister.
Most of the time I decide it's better if i dont bother my dad at all with this crap, since all it is is a bunch of crap. To him, Its easier to make me take my sister and have my GF worry about getting to school because Sister raises hell every time anyone tries to deal with her. I don't want to try raising hell to get my way either, because then id be just as bad as my sister, and I have enough respect for my dad to leave him out of this. He has enough to worry about: He's our only parent and he needs a heart transplant.
I really just feel a need to be respected, not only by my sister, but by my girlfriend too, especially from her, actually. I just can't get any though. I don't know what the fuck i'm supposed to do. Its like im caught in this big argument between them, and I have to speak for both of them. yet either person I argue for, I really get nothing from it if I win.
help
