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I won't say that I'll always have the right advice...or that I always know the answer.

I don't.

But I will say that I've traveled to some dark places in my nearly 18 years of living, and that when someone is going through something hard...they should never feel like they have to be alone.

If you want to go it alone, fine. But when it really starts to hurt, let someone in. Even if its someone on this site that you don't know. Sometimes strangers are easier to talk to than a friend or parent...

Just be safe, and do whatever you need to do to take care of yourself...

I'll always listen.

advice

Should I rat on her to the cops?

No offense, but is this a serious question?

Anyways, regardless, talk to her first...see who its affecting (if anyone) and express that to her. Try to help her out, let her know that you want her to stop...pull in some other members of the family if you can.

--Starlight88

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my sister has a horse, which is really expensive. the up front price of the horse was over 20,000 dollars. then there's room and board, horse shoes, food, vet (each appointment is $800), and horse shows which are easilly over $1000 dollars each. my dad says that the horse costs about 10,000 dollars per year. did i mention that this is her SECOND horse? i don't horseback ride, i play tennis instead which is not expensive at all!!! but my sister gets just a little less for christmas than i do...i don't think this is fair at all. like not to sound spoiled, but my parents usually spend about $1000 dollars on me at christmas and just a hundred dollars less on her....i just think i'm getting the worst deal ever for me because she gets soo much more money spent on her than i do, i don't think i should be punished for not participating in a way overpriced sport!! you know? and for christmas i'm a new bedspread and shelves and stuff...but i think that's pretty much all i'm going to get because it kind of adds up. the bed spread was 885 dollars because i had it custom made. i just really want stuff that i can actually use for christmas and i don't know how to ask my mom without sounding like a brat. but i just don't see how this is fair at all!! how can i tell my parents this?!

You seem to enjoy tennis, your sister seems to enjoy horseback riding, your parents *have* to spend money in order to take care of the horse because its a living, breathing creature, and yet...they still spend a substantial amount on you.

I'm not quite ready to say that you, perhaps, are the unfavored sister. Any gift you receive should not be about monetary value, but about the thought behind the gift. I understand where you're coming from, but I also think that you'll have less of a problem if you stop tallying every monetary inequally between yourself and your sister.

Instead of worrying about her getting or having more than you, look at all the things you have...all the things that you have been blessed with and be grateful, because (though I'm sure you know this) there are some kids who can only dream about having what it is that you and your sister have.

(Wanna talk more? E-mail me at cocoabee_swirl88@yahoomail.com)

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So today I had a really unlucky day...everything that could go wrong went wrong. I even didn't feel good today. I still have the migrain i had an hour ago. Anyways At the very end of the schoolday I took my phone out to text my boyfriend when I was done i put my phone in my pocket. When I was on the bus with my boyfriend I was about to call my mom and it figures my phone wasn't in my pocket so it must have fallen out. I called my mom on his house phone and told her and she got really pissed. She was talking so negativly to me about it saying i will never see it again. How does she know? Then she was telling me that i don't care about anything and I don't take care of my stuff... She was basically telling me its all my fault. Is it my fault for it falling out of my pocket? Then when I got off the phone she calls right back and tells me i shouldn't be with my boyfrined and that we need time apart. Now what does he have to do with this? She made my day much worst and made me feel like total crap. I can never confront her because she gets even more mad. She just loves pulling those guilt trips. I'm just so upset right now.

I can relate, and the only thing I can say to you is don't get upset, don't get angry, and don't get depressed.

Are you any of those things? (I don't think so)

Then as hard as it is to do so, let it go.

People will make a living out of speaking negatively to people when they've had a bad day, or just simply don't know how to respond to the situation. Mistakes happen, people lose things all the time. Just be as careful as possible and, if it helps to get her off your back, offer to help pay for a replacement phone by helping around the house, or with actual money.

Guilt trips are good for making you feel guilty, but that doesn't mean you have to stay that way. Everything's not your fault, and everyone makes mistakes.

That's what being human is all about.

(Hope that helps!)


(If you have anymore questions, feel free to contact me at cardenb@countryday.net!)

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