I guarantee I've either done it or seen it! No judgement ! Ask anything you want and it will be my personal goal to answer with integrity and honestly. To make sure that whatever the case may be you have tools that will get you the best result which is success, peace, and happiness. Much Love!
Gender: Female
Location: St. Louis currently Seattle
Occupation: Collections
Age: 26
Member Since: March 17, 2009
Answers: 54
Last Update: July 10, 2009
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I'm a 16 year old girl, not allowed to talk to boys, not allowed to have a boyfriend, and not allowed to hang out with guy. It's not that I like a guy and want a boyfriend, because I don't, but I have some guy friends that are strictly friends, but I'm never allowed to hang out with them. I've snuck around and have done it anyway, but I don't like that. My friends that are girls get mad when I always "ditch" them when they're hanging out with guys because I can't. I'm even going to a sleep away chorus camp, and my mom asked me if boys would be there. Of course there will be! Then she said that maybe I shouldn't go. The only guys I've hungout with are gay/pass as gay, and one of them is my neighbor that I've known forever, and she still got mad about that. I can understand why she doesn't like guys. Her sister got pregnant at a young age, and she doesn't trust any guy because of that, but that won't happen to me. I'm really self conscious about my body, so I'd never let a guy see me naked, I would be killed if I got pregnant, I want a future that includes college, and I don't even want kids of my own. I'm planning on adopting. What can I do to convince my mom to let me be friends with guys? I'm going to be a junior in high school and no guy is going to ask me to jr. prom because I'm not even allowed to talk to guys. It happened this year with the sophomore dance, and I just want to have a social life that includes guys. (link)
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Firstly I understand how you feel. Listen to this though. Being pregnant at a young age can be a lonely scary thing. That and that alone is the reason why your mom is acting this way.I know a lot of women including myself that got preg. At a young age and its hard. She doesn't want you to have that kind of life because she loves you.so for that much your mom deserves some credit. However I do believe her actions are stunting your social growth.I know you say that you don't like any1 right now, but that will change. You should experience dating so you don't fall for the first crazy that tells you you're pretty. Not saying you're not of course but there are men ready to take advantage of naïve women of all kinds and you need to be prepared for that.But you should experience the good in real love and healthy relationships and how a man should treat you. Also don't give up on kids just quite yet! You have plenty of time to make that decision. Try having a conversation with your mom about trust. You sound like your mom has done a good job with you so far. Its time to convince her of that as well! Oh and no body consciousness! (sp)? You are allowed to love your body just the way it is! I checked!
Much Love!
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ok so i asked this question a few months ago (http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=557281.) . if you dont wanna read it; basically my bff and her bf had been going otu for 2 months and he obv didnt like her as much as she liked him, he was tagging along everwhere, he had a boring personality, and she acted much more not herself around her friends when he was around.
see, shes still going out with him. my other best friend and i (this girl is her best friend, too) confronted her a few weeks ago because we just couldnt take it anymore, we hate this kid soo much. and you were right. she said she was really happy right now and she didnt want to mess things up, but she listened to what we had to say and let us sound off. shes a great friend and we totally let it all out, uncensored, and she understood our opinions, didnt think we were jealous.
thing is its been nearly 5 months and im ready to rip my head off. i havent had one on one time with my bff in months, since early february. (and i have no classes, lunches, whatever with her in school). its partly because we're busy but partly because her weekends are filled with boyfriend time.
im happy shes happy but i cant standd this kid. hes rude in the way that he ignores us (her friends) when we're around, ive given up even trying to make conversation with him because it gets nowhere. there are no positive qualities in him whatsoever. and this is really damaging my bffs and mine friendships. what should i do?
thanks so much, i really apprecaite it, and sorry for the length:) (link)
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I was in a similar situation! I hated my bff's boyfriend because he was an a-hole to her and a liar But here's what I found out no matter what I said as her friend she had to see the situation 4 what it was on her own. Basically there's nothing you can do but be her friend and be there for her and it super sucks! To you ole boy is not the truth but something he is doing feels right for her and really its not his responsibility to make sure you guys as her bff's are happy just your friend. So try planning a girls day w/out him and try to keep it going so you can spend time with your friends w/out males.that will help! But in the meantime its a grin and bear it type situation. I'm sorry honey! Much Love!
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I am 20/f my father moved out a year ago and things didnt end on a good note. I am in a very HAPPY 3 year realtionship. My sister just moved out and i live at home alone with my mother. I do not have any friends that I go out with so the only times I go out I go with my bf and his friends which isnt a problem because i like his friends. I just watched a movie called I Love You, Man. Its about a guy who doesnt have any friends and his fiance is woried he may become too clingy. I have that worry. I worry that I will drive my bf away or I will make him dislike things about it. Because of this worry or fear I tend to sometimes be emotional and cry infront of him. I do not like to let him see me cry I want him to never see the empty sad side of me. Me and my sister don't really ahve a friendship and me and my mom have NO realtionship. She is over clingy because she has no one, even though she has friends who want ot go out with her she doesnt want to, she just wants to be with her daughters and will ask me and my sister for permission to go out. She annoys me, she eats with her hands, chews really loud talks with her mouth full, IS CLINGY and always wants a phone call morning and evening to know where we are who we are with and what we are doing. I am afraid she may be the very reason I feel so UCK! When i was young i never went out much, my motehr didnt let me, I tried to join sports teams so i could get out and she wouldnt allow it. I blame her for not having good friends now and I just want to move out and live on my own, especially now that I have seen how happy my sister is, Im jealous. I am also going to school in september to work with kids and hopefully that will help. I need advice on how to fill my Empty hole. I speak to my boyfriend about this situation so much I don't want him to worry about me or our relationship. I don't want to talk about it with him anymore, there is nothing he can do. I don't even know what my question is. I just want opinions and thoughts on my situation. Please just tell me whta you think I should do!!!!! (link)
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Firstly, Calm down and take a deep breath and let me and you process this. Your mom, your sister, your boyfriend yor dad, all these people all I hear about you is a negative emotion or feeling. So what makes you feel good and I mean you! Not any of the above people you! For example, when I am the happiest is when I sing karaoke! I know silly right! But I do it for me because I love it. Its absoutely ok for you to be you and take some time for you where you can turn your phone off and in that moment you are your only responsibilty! Its ok! If your empty how can you truly give love to your bf? Or your sister or your mom? Its ok to take some time for you! Take some time and think about your life and what you would like to do with your life! Become responsible for the way you feel! Its ok and that I promise you! And next time you talk to your bf, try not to cry but explain how you feel and ask him for a solution. Men are very solution based! If he loves you he will help you with a solution so you feel better. And maybe try and help mom feel the same way, so she will try and have a life outside you but know she loves you. And maybe try and help her with the chewing thing cuz yea.... But Much Love, take time for you! And that's an order! :)
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