about

I'll give my opinion. I'm optimistic and sometimes too loud. I talk more than my fair share and usually have nothing to say. I have a slight tendency to be messy, self revealing, and disorganized. I've been described as social, tough, outgoing, and I rarely worry. I'm open, a risk taker, I love the unknown, and sometimes like to stand out. I am reckless, optimistic, positive, strong, don't usually like to be alone, I'm ambivalent about chaos, abstract, impractical, a thrill seeker, not rule conscious, abstract, rarely irritated, anti-authority, and attracted to the counter culture.

advice

Well, there is this guy that I really like. I mean, the feelings I have for him are undescribable. He is amazing, and wonderful, and everything I could ever want. The only thing is, I'm 14. I can't be "in love" right? So what could these feelings be? When I am with him or just talking to him on the phone or computer, I am as happy as I could be. The feelings have stayed the same for about a year, only I have liked him more and more. Everytime I see him it's like I can't breathe for that second. Even when he signs on AIM, I am so happy. I even get the chills just THINKING about him. And I never stop thinking about him, I mean it's like someone just mentions a guy and I'm like omg, I love him. and people tell me it's love, but it can't be. I am too young and I don't know what love feels like. What are these feelings I have? Is it really "love"? Or just a crush? Whatever it is..can I get over it?=/

I hate to call it puppy love, but that's what the lame term is for it.

a better way to describe it is just to start talking about it. you feel like the love they describe in the movies and that seems genuine enough. love in real life is very different. you know it's love when you'd give your life for them. you care about them more than yourself. everything about them - their flaws, faults, and all - you love, because that is what makes them who they are.

another thing to think about is how much you really know about him. the reason it takes so long to really fall in love is because you need to know everything about that person, and that's a lot. you see couples that finish eachother's sentences and know exactly what the other is feeling even if they try to cover it up - they usually have been together for a long time.

if you are still confused, ask someone that has been married for a long time. if they seem a bit outdated then ask someone who has been married for at least 5 years.

you can ask me if some of this doesnt make sense, just leave a message in my box.

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theres a guy i really like, but he has a gf. i cant stop thinking about him, and its really making me sad. how can i get my mind off of him?
ps-i do a lot of sports and activities, but that doesnt help. any other ideas?

Sounds like you like him because you can't have him. don't take that the wrong way, I do it too. we all do at some point. as far as getting your mind off him, you kind of have to wait for another to come along. it's really difficult because he's right there in your thoughts already, but start looking around and you may find someone who is interested in you that you just didnt notice before. if there seems to be a "guy shortage" at your school, try a local concert or some place else that would have a guy with the same interests as you have. maybe a friend knows some cute guys for a fun blind date. don't dwell on this taken guy too much, he's just not worth all that attention!

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i liked your response for this question and i was really hoping that you could help me a bit more. the fact is i can't ask him out..its just not my style-im a bit too shy and i don't want to get rejected. i get the whole "be confident" thing but i'm not sure if i should just forget it because he'll be graduating next year anyway so i won't see him. but i really like him..and he's so adorably cute...also..almost everyone knew that i liked him so maybe that could have been a turn off? how do i fix the problem? please help! thanks.

you have a lot of time before he graduates. go for it! i highly doubt you'd be rejected, but i can understand not wanting to ask him.
the problem with you telling everyone could make him think that you gossip or something and he could be a more private person. if he has heard that you like him, and he very well may not have, then he may not believe it.
if there's anything else just let me know.

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My girlfriend and I have been going out for 9 months, and its the first time I've loved anyone. Yesterday we were talking about looks and why it does/doesn't matter in a realtionship. She told me she wasint that physically attracted to me but my personality was enough. I didn't know how to react, I just smiled. She basically told me I was ugly and I dont know what to do. It sucks because I love her so much and I feel so low right now. I dont know what to do/what to think/ etc.

-17/male

I really dont think that she meant to be mean and i definately wouldnt break up with her for that. it seems like she was trying to compliment you, but it didnt come out perfectly.

as far as what to do, say something if it really bothers you. i know its not easy, but it will be better for you in the end.

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i like a guy who is a year older than me. He's amazingly cute and a lot of girls like him. at the beginning of this year we saw each other at these student forum meetings at school and he always came and sat by me and talked and smiled-i could tell he liked me so at the homecoming dance i asked him to dance and it was great- at school we usually just say hi and smile in a flirtacious way during passing periods-but lately we don't say anything and i don't think he likes me anymore-how do i get his attention and get him to like me again?

He's probably wondering what happened. the chase may have been too long and he took all your flirting for just flirting and nothing more. you may need to drop a hint that you want more. maybe go bold and ask him out for an evening. you'll find that a lot of guys respond better if the girl makes the first move because they know that you are interested in them. Be careful not to make it too casual if you want a relationship. guys dont always respond to the "obvious" little hints we drop.

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