about

Well, I'm not an expert on anything, that's for damn sure. But, I've lived in 2 countries, 5 states (over a course of 12 different moves or so), traveled most of europe, gone to college, had good relationships and bad, experimented with drugs (I won't go into listing them all...), played in sports, bands, had all kinds of jobs, have seen all kinds of things. I guess what I'm trying to say, is that I've experienced my fair share, but I say that you can never experience enough! In any case, any advice I give is just my humble opinion. And you know what they say about opinions? They're just like bellybuttons... everyone's got one.

What's that you say? Where did I get that sexy hat in my profile pic? It's from Afghanistan. That's right... the same place they make Afghanistanimation!

advice

ok this might be long but plz help...ok well this guy asked if i wanted to go to the movies with him and i said yes, but i thought we were goin as friends..then the next day my friend sent me a message and said congrats u goin out with *** i said what! were just gonna go to the movies...so then i texted ***** and i said u know were not goiun out,,@@@ said that we were, what diod u tell her, and he replied well she thought right i like u and i was gonna tell u when we got to the movies no matter what u were gonn a say, and he asked if i wanted to go out, i told hgim i dont really want a bf right now, sry, and then he got mad now he wont return my calls are answer my messages what do i do

Well, first off, don't get down on yourself because of this. It's not your fault. If he was asking you for anything more than a date, he should have made that clear to you. He was wrong for assuming that you were going to do, or say, or be anything. If he's mad about that then... well, it's his problem. He'll get over it. You did nothing wrong.

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i like this girl. but she has a bf. i think she likes me. but im not sure., she told me im hot. i think she was kiding. so what sould i do.

thanks.... p.s. peace

She could very well like you, bro. But, here's the quick and dirty of it: she's taken, so forget about her. If she leaves him for you... well, think about it. That may not really be the kind of girl that you're looking for. What happens when the next better guy comes along, eh?

But, one has to ask: is her having a boyfriend makeing her exclusive? Or, is she just dating him? In the adult world of courtship, there are people who date, and those that have exclusive relationships. If someone is just dating, then, well, they can date anyone. If they are exclusive... well, you get the idea. It might be worth your while to find out which category she falls into.

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hey well....my ex boyfriend and me were best friends b4 we went out...(the entire reason i didnt wanna date him) but now that we broke up after almost a year of dating every time i read something about relationships being torn apart i break down and cry...but now that he broke up with me ive started to cut myself and go into deep depressions...i want him bak bc when i was with him...there was never a time when i wasnt happy...he could make me smile no matter how sad i was...he might have made a few mistakes but so have i...i juss want him to b happy but i also juss want him to say that in order for him to b happy he needs to b with me...i also started smokking when he broke up with me...idk what to do...my life is going to hell since he broke up with me...idk waht to do...i want him bak but i want him to b happy...

signed ~*lost...

P.S.- y cant i b happy???

One of the hardest things in life to do is to let go of something you love. You feel like now you have this emptiness inside you that will just take you over if it isn't filled back in. You have to do something, but you don't know what. That's why you've turned to smoking and to hurting yourself. Sweetheart, I've been there. Let me tell you, it's not the way. I've been with friends that have been there. This is not the way.
One phrase that a very wise man told me when I was going through some tough times was 'This too... will pass'. What it means, is that this pain, this depression, this emptiness... all of these horrible things... they are temporary. It's agonizing, I know. But, there are certain things that you can't take back. Things that will become permanent scars. And not just from the cutting. Your heart can scar too. But that's just if you don't let it heal in the right way.
What you need to do, is surround yourself with people who care about you. Your family and friends. Talk to them, find a shoulder to cry on. Don't keep this all to yourself. Remember, 'this too, will pass'. No, not soon. It's going to hurt, probably for a long time. But don't go through it alone. You are allowed to grieve. And that's healthy, if you stay healthy doing it.
Try to remember the good things about the relationship. Embrace those good things. Don't let this pain turn into a resentment for you, or him. Yes, it's sad that it had to end, but, part of loving someone is doing what you need to do to let them be happy. So, be strong. I'm sure knowing that you were causing yourself harm wouldn't make him happy. Find someone you can talk to. Cry when you need to. Remember, this too, will pass. Things will get better.

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yea this homeocming is late but this girl asked me to homecoming to her school and I like her...she just doesn't know...I got no idea what i should do for my homecoming and stuff and its this saturday so yea...

Well bro, if she's asking YOU to the dance, I bet there's a good possibility that she likes you too. Unfortunately my friend, when it comes to us guys and what we want in relationships, we're usually our own worst enemies. What I mean is, that if there is something we want (for instance getting this girl to fall for us) then we'll usually do all the wrong things to get it. So, when you go with her, just play it cool. Be nice, be flirty, but DON'T hang on her the whole night and DON'T smother her with too many compliments. Go out, meet people, dance with other girls, make it known that you're out to have a good time. Relax and end enjoy the fact that you having a fun time, and she'll have a good time too. Good luck!

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Hi there, I'm a 15 year old girl falling for a guy... I met him over the summer on the Internet (we go to the same school but never met before) and I fell for him fast. He's basically all I could ever ask for in a guy. We talk constantly all the time on the Internet, but at school he is very shy around me. I'm not a very shy person, so I try to talk to him as much as possible. On the Internet, we talk like we're best friends. But at school he acts sort of mean to me (I think he is just kidding and just tries to act 'cool' in front of his friends :P) But yeah, I can tell that he never really means it to act that way around me because he always glances at me and smiles :) Is this a sign that he could like me? Please help!!! Thanks so much

Yeah, I'm sure he likes you. He just doesn't know how to be comfortable with himself while being with you around his friends. This is an issue, but mainly for him. If he can't get over it (and it's NOT gonna be a quick change, mind you), but you like him still... remove him from the situation. Go to the mall or the movies or whatever and get him more comfortable being around you, but without his friends. Keep talking with him on the net. Get him comfortable with the idea that at least he has a girl that likes him (unlike his loser friends... (well... don't call them loser friends to his face :p) ... otherwise they would have girls hanging around with them too, right?). Anyway, just remember, if it doesn't work out, it's not the end of the world.
--As an afterthought: maybe he's just not that used to you being around him. You may want to take a small step back and approach him less often. Change affects people in different ways, and may just be him not knowing how to deal with all the attention. Give him a little space, and he'll probably come around ;)
Good luck!

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Ok I just got over this relationship from an online girl. We were together 5 months but she held so many lies to me and I never saw her. She lived like 4.5 hours away from me tho. But here is the question. I meet this other girl and she likes me and I like her. She lives in the same state and pretty close. How should I go about this without getting hurt again? I would love to be with her but just am scared i'll be hurt. Please help all that can. Thanks Much

OK bro, I feel your pain. I've been doing the internet dating thing a while due to my separation from available sociable females and have had varying degrees of success. ANYWAY, here's a couple tips for you to protect yourself with the process:
1) Pictures, pictures, pictures! One of the main ways a girl will 'deceive' you is by posting a picture in her profile that is old, not of her, or in some other way not accurate about her actual appearance. So, once you initiate contact, get her to send you some additional pictures. Want to be sure that it's her in the pictures? Ask he to take a picture of herself holding a sign or something with your name on it. If you get any fishy feelings, just drop it and move on to the next one.
2) Question her. The wonderful (and sometimes scary) thing about the internet is the ability to create your own identity. People only know what you tell them. Ask youself, does this sound too good to be true? It might not be, but find out. Ask questions about things in her profile. See if her story adds up. Remember, you know who you are, and you're not the psycho, you need to figure out if she is ;) And again, if it doesn't feel right, move on to the next.

But, you're already setting yourself up for failure if you're scared. If you're interested, send me an e-mail or IM and I'll point you in the direction of someone that helped me not only with women but with my own personal confidence issues. And confidence my friend, is what really attracts the women you want.
Good luck!

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I'm in love with a guy that has girls practically begging for him. He says he likes me too and I write him love notes EvErYdAy..but of course the typical flirty african american popular boy never writes back..and he always flirts with me and we act like a couple. i really like him and he says he really likes me too, i always ask him-"why aren`t we a couple" but its always the same answer...that "he`z been in love before and the girl cheated on him and now he can`t really trust" or "he got too many things on his mind" yet..we hang out and act like we're married or somethinq. I mean-i just wanna wake up every morninq knowing that he`z mine...what should i say to him? i`ve already told him how i feel

If you really want to get this guy then you need to back off. Seriously, if you're writing him love notes already, EvErYdAy... you're giving him too much attention. If you want to grab his attention and MAKE HIM take notice, keep flirting with him for sure... but you need to play a little 'harder-to-get'. Let him know that other guys have been asking you out... certainly don't write him so much unless you're getting the kind of feedback you want from him. Give him the impression that HE would be lucky to date YOU and you'll probably notice a change in his behavior. Give him space and time to start missing you, and he'll start coming to you. Don't make it too easy for him. Personally, I can't stand to be with a girl if she's not a challenge at least some of the time. I think a lot of guys out there would agree. And I'm sure that you don't want to be considered 'easy' either, by anyone's standards.

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