lr0xo's advice column | lr0xo's Advice About Love Life

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Q: I met this guy a few days ago. Basically, I already know he's a player, and I KNOW I'm being played, but I can't stop myself from being attracted to him. I KNOW he's said the same things to other girls because he dated my best friend. He is so OBVIOUSLY a player, but I can't help it! I know he's just trying to get with me. He even knows I have a boyfriend and doesn't care. He keeps saying it isn't cheating if we're not married because he read that somewhere. Help! How do I stop this sudden attraction before it gets worse? Why do I like him so much?

You like him a lot because you know he is hard to get and your attracted to players, thats common, try and be hard to get to him, if you fall to hard it will take a LONG time to get back up trust me, dont ruin your relationship with your boyfriend because of him, stay away!

good luck
hope i helped

Q: 17/f

Well, I asked a similar question not too long ago, but I have done some research & come up with a more specific question. A guy that I don`t know very well likes me (it`s just obvious) & we have hung out twice - note: we know eachother from classes at school, but hadn`t talked for a long time. The first time we hung out was on the beach at night (just us) and the other time watching a movie alone in my room. Quite 'close' situations I suppose.

I have been reading a bit about "friends with benefits" (no intention of having sex with him, ever) and "romantic friendships" (male/female, not same sex). It`s summer and I wouldn`t mind some combination of those two concepts. However, I was advised earlier that this may 'break his heart' - we hardly know eachother, I`d certainly hope that he doesn`t like me THAT much.

I have decided that communication will be important since I must be sending awfully mixed signals to him. How can I bring up the topic that I am starting to like him but am not looking for a serious relationship? His past relationships have been quite long (over a year, times two?) so I don`t know if he`d even feel comfortable with that idea.

I will be seeing him on Monday again but I`m not sure if that`s even an appropriate time to begin talking seriously about things. I want my intentions to be known sooner than later though so there isn`t any confusion. Thanks for the insight! =)

well i think that if he really liked you that much that you would hurt him he would have asked you out or told you, you should maybe call him "friend" to make things a little more obvious that you don't want him to be more.

good luck
hope i helped

Q: How do I get over a boy who was my first love & ripped my heart out by text & on aim he yelled at me & said WE R OVER finished byby!? I just cant get over it. And the weird thing is is that i wanted to break up with him weeks ago but, i couldnt find the heart & then he shocks me & said " listen there's no easy way of saying this but i want to break up with u" thats low. HOWW? & the worst part is is that he is going to summer camp with me. He also told me he loves me still but yet broke up with me. I NEED SERIOUS HELP! Our anniversey is 4-22-08 ( i know its short but we liked eachother for 2 years ) anyways every where i look the number 22 is there i just cant get over him & i am loosing precious beauty sleep over this. (: I dont know why i still love him. I hate that i love him. Some days i just sit on the couch listening to Me & his song eating cookie dough crying. i am being a female dog to my family cus of this. I had a dream that he was my first kiss too. i just cant!!!

The best thing to do is do something to get your mind off of him trust me, if thats how he is you can do better. does he not talk to u anymore? if he still talks to you, ask him what it was that made you guys break up, dont make it sound like you care too much .. say that you "thought it was the best idea too" (even if you dont)if he gives you a good reason, that might help but if he has no reason & he honestly likes you try & win him back at camp!

good luck
hope i helped

Q: So this guy I was going out with during Summer 06 just reconnected with me about a week ago. It was really random, but we just started talking about how we used to be so close two years before, although he has a girlfriend.
And he said, "I think I'm going to break up with her. I really like you. I want to be with you."
But then he decided he wanted to stay with her. I was basically led on, and I don't know how he feels anymore but he has a girlfriend when he told me he liked me still. I don't know what to do or where I stand, I already explained to him how I felt and it wasn't fair, and he just said he was sorry about it but there was nothing he could do. It's tough, bc he won't talk to me the same anymore.
I don't really know what to do. Should I give up on him or what?

thats harsh, he shouldnt of led you on thats just wrong he was obviously either trying to play two girls, he thought he liked you but was attached to his girlfriend, or he was at the time fighting with his girlfriend, stay away from him if he still has a girlfriend because all that can turn out in a big mess, if hes single talk to him like a friend and talk to him about their relationship not like you care too much, if you still like him dont let him know because guys will use that to there advantage, tell me if you need anymore help, i tried helping you from what you said but if you have anymore information let me know

hope i helped

Q: 16/f
Hi! Well I hate that I am so shy the first time I meet someone. Whenever I meet someone for the first time I am ridiculously shy especially when its a cute guy, and I don't really know why because once I know the person I am COMPLETE opposite! Its hard for me to approach a guy that I think is cute the first time I see him, like everyone i guess i get nervous, but i'm just tired of that. Many of my friends can just go up to a guy and say 'hi, i'm so and so blah blahh' but i just cant. I guess my problem is like a lot of other girls i'm afraid of rejection and I am self conscious. with the whole self conscious thing the problem is when i want to approach a cute guy, i get intimidated by other girls in the room who i think are better than me and i start to think, why would this guy want to talk/dance with me when he could talk to all these other better girls. and really im not normally this self conscious its just when im around guys im first meeting, thats why i cant figure out why im so shy. please help me find a way to become confident! THANKS!

i am the sameeee way, my strategy is first give my self a boost of confidence, make yourself believe that you are the hottest thing in that room, even if you really dont think so, go up to that guy and without even thinking say somethin like hey. People you dont know, wont know your self conscious and like you said people you do know you're complete opposite, so you just have to make the people who dont know you think your confident, even if your not the prettiest or outgoing girl its amazing what you can make people think by just acting like you have a little confidence, maybe say somethin to lighten things up sometimes ill just say somethin really dumb ( that i know is kind of silly) so they can get a laugh at me and ill not be as nervous i know that sounds weird but it really helps. Dont over think it before you go and talk to someone, then youll over analyze what they will think

hope i helped
leanna

Q: My best friend hooked me and her boyfriend's friend up and we've been going out for a couple of days. Well, today, we had our first kiss. And now it feels like there are butterflies in my stomach and I have this really read feeling in my chest. Like electricity flowing through me. What does it mean? I mean, I don't think it is possible to love someone if you just started to date them, right? So what is that weird feeling?

aw that means u really like him =] thats really cute, good luck with your boyfriend giiirl

Q: 15/f

I got my first boyfriend about a month a week ago. Hes super shy and I'm also his first girlfriend. Since its summer, and I knew we probably wouldn't see each other a lot, I decided to try and make plans so we could atleast hang out once a week. I have to make the plans. He doesn't. I have to call him. I have to text him. At first I was totaly okay with that because I really liked him and I was stoked he asked me out. But then I asked him if he wanted to go to the movies and he was all for it. Then later he sent me a text saying he had to go bowling with his family and couldn't go. So I was all okay, blow me off. its iight. so then i got talking to my best friend's boyfriend (he was practically the one who got us together) and he kept pushing me to call him, and so i did. but then his phone was off and we started talking again. I mentioned that I thought my boyfriend didn't really like me and he agreed. then I started talking to my best friend (his girlfriend) and she also agreed. So I don't know. I called again and left a voicemail this time saying we needed to talk. I know once school starts again, we'll be all good. But I don't know if we're going to last the summer. I really need to talk to him and see whats actually going on. Should I wait it out till school, or what? I wanted my first boyfriend to be someone I really liked, and he liked me. Not some random kid that I wasn't even friends with at first ask me out. So likee yeaah. Should I wait it out? Does he actually not like me or is he really that bad of a boyfriend?

i really think that he is just like you said super shy to do anything first ( call, make plans, even hang out) maybe at first just go on double dates like with your best friend and her boyfriend that might make him feel less shy since he'll be around the other guy, i really dont think that you should take your best friends advice about him not liking you, other peoples opinions could really mess up the relationship, you just have to go with what you feel is right, could you see yourself without him? i think the best idea is to talk it over with him first asking if he really does like you and if hes ready to have a girlfriend because he needs to commit

hope i helped

bio

i have been through so much in my life already that i just want to help out people who are either going through things i've experienced or that need comfort or really good honest advice, i also know a lot of good websites and things so i can pretty much help with any advice, if i really dont know how to help i will just tell you because the last thing i want to do is give bad advice =] IM me if its urgent