Swiss's advice column | Swiss's Advice About Love Life

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Q: okay well i'm 13 & the guy i like is 16. is that bad?? like he gives me signs that he likes me too but all my friends are going "laura, he's 16." & i go "so?". i just want to know if that is too much of an age difference.

I think it's fine. I'm fourteen and I like a guy who's sixteen. You've got nothing to worry about. If you really like him and he likes you, there's never really an excuse for age difference (I don't mean to offend anyone, but 20 or 30 years is a lot). But no, you're fine. It's a great feeling when you like someone and you're in love. You shouldn't be deprived of that. Go for it!

Q: me & my bf are totally in love.
but we graduate this year and are going to dif.high school.help?

Oh, I've been in situations like this before. Okay, definitely get his phone number, e-mail, any way you can contact him. If the highschool he's going to isn't too far away, maybe see about seeing him after school, hang out with him. If he's farther away (like "farther" as in "I'm never able to see him"), talk to him on the phone or e-mail him. Staying in touch is probably the most important thing you can do. Just keep in touch and you'll be fine.

Q: hey you just answered a question for me a while ago....well i have another situation...you see ive been friends with this guy from the same department as me for a while now and he really likes me...he asked me out once and i said i didnt feel that way for him, and then now that im getting into a new guy he asked me out again tonight! hes so sweet and like a great guy but theres nothing there for me whereas this new guy does have that spark for me, but i havent really spoken to him that much! ugh i dont know what to do im just so confused:S you knw wat i mean...any thoughts on the matter would be great:D thanks

Hey, it's me again. I'm kind of in a situation like this, except, I'm in highschool. Okay, first things first.
This gut you do like, what is it that you like about him? His looks? His personality? Both? If you haven't been able to talk to him much, that's a definite thing to do. Now this other guy, his personality is okay, right?
Wow this is hard. A relationship is the best and will succeed if you start out as friends. If you're attracted to the new guy you're just because of his looks...get to know him better. I believe that a person you truly like will keep you thinking about them. Believe me. I like someone so much, I think he's driving me crazy! Especially since I see him maybe twice a month. If you can't stop thinking about the new guy, here's what you do...
If you can't stop thinking about him, it's probably best you become friends with him, and maybe date him, if you're serious. Then in this situation, maybe the guy who likes you could be a great friend. Although you may not be attracted to him, try telling him that you'd like to get to know him better--as friends! Maybe he could surprise you! He's probably shy. It's always hard to make the first move.
If for any reason it doesn't work out with the new guy, then this guy you work with will be there to support and comfort you. And so will I, I'll be here too. Who knows? Maybe your admirer might catch your eye! Try to be friends with the guy, remember: you can never have enough friends! But go with your heart. If there's someone you can't get out of your head, someone who drives you crazy, they're the one. Just know that I'm here and I'll always be here to help. Good luck! You'll be fine!

Q: ok well theres this guy i work with and i thought he hated me because he never spoke to me, but turns out he has a crush on me...someone told me! and from then on it was kinda obvious. well the person who told me is like communicating between us , and she gave me his cell number and told me that he wants me to call him! but idunno i dont want to be the one to make the first move! you know? and hes the one who was intrested in me first so i think he should do something! what should i do....i want to talk to him, but not like that. Oh and the reason we cant talk at work is cause we're from different departments! thanks in advance

Oh, this is so cute! Okay, I can see how you don't want to make the first move. But really, it's okay! Call him! When you're talking to him, ask him if he'd like to see you out of work some time (by 'departments' you mean work, I'm assuming). If he does like you, he sounds really shy, think of how thrilled he'll be when you call! I'm saying go for it! Good luck!

Q: well usally theirs steps in a relationship and you usally tell your bf/gf that you want to go to the next step in a relationship as in my case french kiss or make out. but this person lives in another state. when they come to visit i'd like to take this step. so i was gonna tell them i wanted to make this step. but is that a good idea because i hardly ever see this person. i dont want to go to far and then not see them for a while and reck our relationship. any advice? thanks

Okay. If you really like someone, I think it's good to take risks. The next time you talk to them, although it's going to be awkward at first, ask them if they're ready to take it to the next level. Think of it. What if they say "Sure! I've been thinking the same thing, but I was too nervous to ask you!". Think of how happy you'll be. If you really like this person, take a chance! Go for it! Good luck!

Q: My friend Melissa met this boy Bob who goes to her school. They just started talking one day, and now they talk alot. The problem is that Bob doesn't really seem to be "at her speed". For example, he's already talking about them "doing it" and he wants her to come to his house. But Melissa's not ready for that stuff yet. What should she do? My advice is for her to tell him she just wants t be friends, but I'm not even sure whether she likes him or not. What's your advice? Thanks

Okay, you're her friend. First: ask her if she likes him. If so, that's fine that she does. What's not okay, is that he's moving too fast. She's young, they just met, you can't let her...do it with him. If she does like him, let her tell him she likes him, but make sure she tells him she's not ready. That she won't be ready for a while. If they want to go out, let them go out. But under no circumstances, none whatsoever, DO NOT LET HIM PRESSURE HER!!! If he does, move on. If he wants to force her into doing something she doesn't want to do, he's not the one for her. Good luck!

Q: well i think i like this guy im not really sure... thats my problem.... everytime i think of him i get exited and i smile and stuff... but im always afriad to hang out with him... this is the situation... he likes me im positive about that... but i didnt like him.. and i think im now starting too... but i think i might be afriad to like him because of what other people think... cause everyone i kno hates him.. so why do i like him? should i like him? i dont kno what to do... and im afriad hes gunna ask me out and im not gunna kno what to say...

Hey! I've been here before! You get all excited and you can't stop thinking about him right? Yep. Here's what I think. Take a chance. Who cares what anyone thinks? If you like someone, go for it! Don't be afraid to like him. Hang out with him! It's an amazing feeling when you like someone. If you don't take the chance, how will you know what's right? You've looked before you leaped, now do it! I wish you the best of luck!

bio

Hey! My name's Kristen and I'm here to be a shoulder for anyone to lean on. I'll be honest, but I sware I'll only do what's best for you. I'm not here to hurt people.
I am a martial artist, I've trained in Shotokan for a year and Kempo for a couple of months. I love singing, acting, and writing, just a couple of my passions. Video games are my saviors on snow days, my favorite color combination is red and black, I love dragons and tigers...um, yeah, that's about it for now I guess.