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hey there. I think I can help you out!!
ok, so let me tell you a little about myself.
I name is stephanie, in 21 now, but Ive been living on my own since I was 17. my parents home was a toxic place for me to be. My parents and I got along great! BUT, they didnt get along with eachother at all, and when they decided to split up, they both moved into seperate 1 bedroom apartments...which left me no where to live. They were so selfishly caught up in their divorce, they didnt have time to worry about me. I made a BIG decision that a kid should NEVER have to make, but in the end, I decided the best thing for me to do, was to take care of myself.
ok. so this is where my advice begins.
I dont feel like your mother has ANY right to take the things that YOU pay for. you are an ADULT, if you are paying for your car, then its YOURS and she cant touch it. same with the cell phone, laptop, etc. in this situation, most parents use the "You live under MY roof" excuse.
make it very clear to her that if her behavior with your things does not lighten up, you will no longer be "under her roof". giving her this ultimatum may just me the eye opener that she needs to realize that shes alienating you!
Ive lived on my own for 4 years now, and while Ive never had any trouble paying the bills, my biggest peice of advice to you is IF THERE IS ANY WAY TO STAY HOME, DO IT. but, i know that young people like us have our limits and we can only take so much until we just cant take it anymore.
ok, now
IF YOU DO happen to move out, i want you to know that it CAN be done. I want to be realistic with you, and let you know its going to be VERY HARD. and VERY STRESSFUL. IT is going to take alot of sacrificing on your part and it will put lots of stress on your relationship.
but it can also be the most liberating experience in the world. and it feels great to know that you are supporting yourself and you dont owe anyone for your success! :-)
ok some good tips. the keys to success:
1. whatever you do, dont get ANY credit cards. if you have one already, keep it, but NEVER max it out and start using it for emergency purposes ONLY> too many people I know abused them and now are barely in their 20's and have ruined their credit already. I was smart and NEVER GOT ONE to begin with.
2. be careful with your relatonship with your boyfriend. Chris and I have been together for 5 years and when we moved in together, it made us MUCH closer, and now we are due to be married in december. BUT living together will also give you more things to fight about so be careful. dont let stupid things hurt your relationship.
Chris and I live in a 620 sq ft apartment in the Houston area of Texas. Heres a list of our bills.
(keep in mind I make 10.21 and hour and he makes 12 an hour)
1. rent: $565.00/month
2. electricity on average is about $100 a month
3. my new car is $306.73 /month
4. his new truck is $300.75 / month
5. my insurance is $221 /month
6. his insurance is $151 / month
7. groceries are about $ 150-200 /month
8. cell bill is $132/month
9. gas for both of us is about $180/month
and these are just the necessities. If you want anything extra, like cable or internet, remember thats going to be extra.
also keep in mind, for us to buy everything to furnish our apartment, it cost us about $200 including furniture, dishes, etc.
it can be done. what you need to remember is that the first 6 months you need to watch your money like a HAWK and make sure you are sticking to your BUDGET. this means no going out partying, blowing money on unecessary stuff. after about 6 motnhs, you should be able too look at your expenses and know what you can and can not afford to blow.
bills are the number 1 priority. you can ruin your life if you dont pay them. so spare yourself the trouble, and just pay them. no exceptions.
im very excited for you and I want to be there for you for support!!
email me and we can talk more about it. I can answer any questions, you can ask me anything, and i have more advice to give but this post is getting really long.
im here for ya girl! mail me!
stephanie.ellick@gmail
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