I am a father of three, girl, boy, girl, all are now over 18. I have been married for 29 years as of 6-30-07, so yes, if you do the math I was married at 18, just after graduating high school. I am very aware of the pit falls of doing so, but we made it through the really tough times. I came to this site, because of my daughter, she also uses the site.
I am an author and have written three books, only one under this name, but it is not how I make my living. I am in business, working full time and I have a seasonal business in ponds, selling Koi, goldfish, water plants and supplies. I help people to plan and build ponds, as well as, maintenance if they need it.
I am not here for the ratings and could careless what you rate me. I will tell you things I know, I will tell you what you don't want to hear, but most of all, I will tell you things from my perspective. I have experienced a lot in my life, I have not lived with my head in the sand and I'm a realist, you want someone to blow smoke up your as*, don't read my writings, (I don't do fairy tales).
I am not so foolish as to think I am always right, I can only tell you what I know and give you something to think about. It is up to you to find out if I'm right or not.
Life is complicated, because people are complicated and one answer does not necessarily fit all, but that doesn't mean you should not consider what I say as a possibility.
Feel free to write me personally if you wish, there is only so much you can say in such a restrictive environment as this site is, it doesn't allow for proper conversation.
Thank you for coming to my column and giving me the chance to help.
E-mail: gibber@cableone.net
Gender: Male
Location: Minnesota
Age: 53
Member Since: May 14, 2008
Answers: 285
Last Update: March 27, 2013
Visitors: 26986
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Lately, I've been feeling disconnected from everything and everyone. Like from my friends, family, church, school, and even God. I don't understand what's going on but I just don't feel close to anything anymore.
I've had a rough year full of fights with friends, nonstop arguments with my parents, and just overwhelming stress. Now, I don't feel anything. I just feel numb and disconnected.
When I look around at my classmates and even my extended family, it makes me feel so lonely. They all seem so close with each other and they always have each others' backs. And I don't have that. I'm not part of their friendship or closeness.
My family (intermediate that is) moved around a lot because my dad was in the military. He just recently retired. So, the earlier parts of my childhood, I didn't get the chance to feel close to my extended family because I always lived on the other side of the country from them. But now, I just feel so jealous and left out at family reunions, which is just really really sad.
Same thing goes sorta for my friends. When I first moved here, there was a brief period where I felt close to my friends. But then, all that changed during these random fights we've had this year. Now, I'm totally lost and feel so alone.
And in my church, I used to be the one everybody knew of because of my music. I'd always get asked to perform during the services, but now I don't. I've been replaced and I don't understand =[
I just want to feel close again. I want to feel needed and just...connected again. But I feel as if that's not even possible anymore. Like it's too late or something. (link)
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"When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom, let it be."
You know, I have never been a real big Beatles fan, but they had their moments of wisdom. You really don't think he really meant that Mary really came to him do you? Do you think that maybe he was speaking metaphorically? I do, I think he was trying to say that sometimes when we are down, really down, it is there that we find our biggest most profound truths and I would ask you if that is what you seek?
Loneliness, doubt, fear, alienation are they cries for help? Or is it our innate need to look inwards and contemplate our own self worth. When others no longer help us, we retreat within ourselves looking for answers from our spirit, when we don't know that, that is what we are doing, it scares us and those around us. Don't be afraid to find yourself and your spirit, you will return a better person for it.
I envy you your journey, be well.
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Rating: 5
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Hey, thanks for the advice. It was a little confusing though, but it made me think. Think as in contemplate so thank you very much for sharing you wisdom.
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