askabstract_profanity
advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: Okay so sometimes I do like attention. (Example: If I dyed my hair a new color) but once people get close to me or try to.. It scares me.

I can't look at them. I can't even look at people in their eyes. I can only do that with one person and that's my really close friend of almost 2 school years.

because with her, I don't think she's judging me. it's hard to explain. i don't really care what people think. but i don't like people getting up close and reading my eyes. it makes me think they can read me and see emotion.

it just bothers me.

how can i get over it?

i've noticed that i avoid eye contact and sometimes i look up for a mere second .. then i get scared and look down.
Think of it this way, how do the other people feel when you don't look at them. Your eyes are one of the most expressive features you have. You can tell someone is listening to you when you give them contact. You may not be shy, but looking down while talking to someone is certainly giving off that impression.

I had a bit of trouble with that too. But I was shy. I kind of thought of it as a contest. Who will be the first person to look down? And it gradually progressed. And now I enjoy looking at people while I speak to them.

Maybe having a focal point could help too. For instance, try to look at see what their eye color is.

Or you can tell yourself "Okay, I'll look at this person in the eyes for one sentence" and start doing it gradually.

I think it become more of habit. You just got to keep trying, and at times maybe even force yourself. It really is important to look at people when you talk to them.

Good luck!

Yeah I'm really shy. I've done the eye color with my friend.

bio
abstract_profanity
I'm back! 6 years on this site and counting! Let yourself be known for something. It may not be perfect but imperfections are so much more interesting and fun!

I'm well known from my high interest in people. I thrive off helping others.

A lot of people say they have been through a lot. And well, this is true for almost everyone, including me. Rather than let past harm me I embrace what I've dealt with and use it to my advantage in the future.

I'm 20. Turning 21 soon enough. Been there, done that but cetainly have much more to learn. No, I do not know everything and I wouldn't claim. I do know that I am dedicated, educated, generous, motivated, and ambitious. I give all my time and heart into each answer.

I specialize in art, education, communication, psychology, massage therapy, health, travel and destinations.

I know information regarding school, college, abuse, neglect, personalities, relationships, friendships, little bit of info on cars, licit and illicit behaviors and or subjects. But I will be willing to answer anything!


Info
Gender:
Female

Location:
Pennsylvannia

Occupation:
College

Age:
20

AIM:
Member Since:
April 18, 2006

Answers:
94

Last Update:
April 14, 2010

Visitors:
11673

Main Categories:





Favorite Columnists








layout by Adam Particka

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>

eXTReMe Tracker