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Gender: Female
Location: England
Occupation: Student/ General Know-It-All
Age: 22
Member Since: August 17, 2005
Answers: 297
Last Update: January 22, 2011
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Ok... I'm in desprate need of some advice. I was involved in an abusive relationship ( i ended it last year in January) I have since then graduated from high school. When i was in high school I had a little crush on my spanish teacher (i was 18 he was 24), never thought much of it, but i was up at my old school the other day and i saw him again and feelings resurfaced. We talked for a while and he asked me out. This is the first relationship i have even considered entering since ending my abusive one...and i'm not sure if i'm doing the right thing ... please don't say that " i'll know when I'm ready" because thats all i've heard latley ... and it doesn't help...because i'm so confused about the entire thing that i don't know anything anymore.
Thanks so much
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Ok, a few things:
1) Do you feel stronger than you did at the end of your relationship last january: i.e. enough that if it began to happen again you could walk away? This would be a good idea before getting into another relationship.
2) Possibly it would be a good idea to mention to your old teacher after a few dates that you'd like to take this slowly due to a previous unpleasant experience. You can go into as much or little detail as you feel comfortable but just clues him in a little which is always helpful.
3) All that said, perhaps the best way to help you move on now that quite a lot of time has passed is to begin dating again and refuse to let the past hold you back. Just remember you can stop seeing this teacher or anyone at any time you like- you have no obligations to this man and have made no promises so your only responsibility is to stay safe and have a good time.
Really hope it all works out for you x
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