I'll give my full attention to anything you have to ask, whether serious or trivial, long or short.
I'll always give detailed answers because I understand that problems tend to be complex, not black and white.
I won't ever be cold, harsh or judgemental.
Ask away - I check my column regularly! x
Gender: Female
Location: England
Occupation: Student
Age: 18
Member Since: July 23, 2006
Answers: 10
Last Update: April 15, 2007
Visitors: 2210
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what do ladies think semen taste like and if you are experenced in the field do you spit or swallow? (link)
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In my experience, it tastes like a mixture of egg yolk and sea water. I couldn't stand it, and the lukewarm temperature just made it even worse. When I did swallow, it was only because I had a very small amount in my mouth. On the other occasions I had to spit.
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Hey, I'm a guy and I grow my hair out long, over a foot in length. I wear it parted in the middle and pulled back in a pony-tail, and have had it like this for several years now. Just recently, I've started having a lot of breakage in my hair, lots in the shower drain and in the brush or comb. (no, I am not going bald, in case you're wondering) I can see the ends where the hair has broken and it's looking really bad.
Is there a type of shampoo or conditioner that works well for longer hair and prevents breakage? I've been doing other things that my girlfriend suggested such as using a hairdryer and certain ways of combing. But I still have a lot of breakage problem. Don't want to cut it off, either, as I like having it long. =P
Any advice or suggestions? If it helps at all, my hair is also very fine, not thick or curly. (link)
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I also have long, fine hair and I can promise you - the only way to keep it looking fairly healthy at the ends is to have it trimmed every now and then. There are plenty of products out there that might make a small, short-term difference but ultimately you're just going to have to chop off the dry, brittle ends. Just half an inch off will make a difference if you're worried about losing too much length. You could even get your girlfriend to do it if you don't want to pay someone to do such a small job - it's dead easy and I'm sure she'll know how. Good luck! x
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13/f
ughh i can never sleep! it's because of my summer sleep schedual, so i'm trying to go to sleep every night a half hour earlier because school starts next week, but it doesn't make a difference. like, last night i watched tv til 1, read til 2(because i still wasnt tired,) and ended up falling asleep around 3. maybe after. nothing makes me tired, i even tried counting backwards from 100 like, 4 times. i told my mom and she was like well go to bed eariler, so i told her that doesnt work and she said to read, and i told her that doesn't work either, so she just like, walked away she doesnt listen to me. everr. so are there any ways that i can get tired? i want to be asleep for school by 11/11.30 pleasseee hellpp ? (link)
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I went through a patch just like this a couple of years ago - don't worry too much about it, because as soon as you're a few weeks into school you'll find that your body starts to get its act together and get you to sleep earlier as you're getting up earlier and working all day.
Speaking of working all day - do as much physical activity as you can during the day. This won't just tire out your body, your brain also plays a big part in exercise so it should become more able to shut down as well. Do you play any sport? If so, up the energy by playing it more or faster; get a few friends to join in so you're competing and working harder to play against them. If you don't do any sport and don't want to start, what about walking everywhere instead of going in the car? If you've got nowhere to walk to, just go on a walk for the hell of it! Ask to go do the food shopping (carrying heavy bags of food back to the house floors me every time)!
It sounds like you're making the right preparations to go to sleep - reading and watching tv will slow your heartbeat and relax your mind - but perhaps you've got all this leftover energy you haven't used during the daytime, so reading and tv just aren't enough to stop your head and body pounding away into the early hours. I'd say definitely get outside and move as much as you can all day!
Remember though. Sitting/lying down and resting isn't bad. Going to the couch/your bed at eleven and watching tv or reading still gives your body a chance to slow down and rest a bit, which is nearly as good as sleeping. And if you don't feel tired in the early hours of the morning, it's probably because your head and body aren't actually needing much sleep. You'll fall asleep when you need to - it's when you start becoming very tired and still unable to sleep that you may be developing the more serious insomnia.
Just as a last note - don't go eating anything after midnight. It'll just fuel you with more energy - especially if you're drinking fizzy drinks or eating quick-fix foods like chocolate or white bread. I find this really hard as food seems to taste a lot better at night-time, but resist! It's a lot easier to stop if you haven't got a full tank.
Hope it works out, best of luck! xxx
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ok so i live with my dad, and we r very close. i can talk to him a lot too. but when it comes to the puberty subject, i can't talk 2 u anyone about it. what should i do? i just turned 13 about 1 month ago, and i have arm pit hair, hair "down there", and discharge, but i havn't stated my period yet. 1. this discharge is ruining ALL my underwear, and i'm guessing i should get pantyliners but...... how do i get them with my dad, and how should i bring up the subject? what should i do!?!?!?? p.s. sorry this is so long. plz help me!!!!!!!!!!!1 (link)
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This is really tough, but basically the issue will come up at some point - for example, when your periods start - and one of you will have to come forward and say something. Do you want it to be you or your dad? Both will be embarrassing.
Your dad is probably feeling just as awkward about this as you are, and probably has no idea how to bring up the topic of your body changing. However, I reckon that if you say something - even something small at first - his reaction will be a lot more matter-of-fact than stumbling and red-faced. He's an adult after all. If you feel like shaving your armpits sometime soon, why not try asking him first if you can have your own razor? Tell him it's because you want to start shaving your legs, perhaps because all your friends are doing it? This avoids you having to talk about embarrassing body parts or blatant references to puberty, but still puts the idea into his head that you're starting to change physically. (My dad was weird about me shaving my legs, so don't be put off if yours is too at first.) Once you have a razor you can shave your armpits too, and over time your dad will probably put two and two together and you won't even have to talk about it with him.
Do you have your own allowance? If so, there's no reason why you can't pick up pantyliners/pads/razors and, one day, sanitary towels. If you're worried about it being incredibly embarrassing, don't! It's so easy and shop-workers are usually way too bored to even notice what you're buying. If you don't have an allowance, maybe you could ask for one, now that you're thirteen? It wouldn't need to be much; pantyliners aren't expensive.
About pantyliners and discharge: sorry to be graphic, but most girls/women would agree that discharge will often leave a mark on your underwear, even after washing. It sounds gross, but it's something most of us get and unless you've got it really heavily you don't need to worry. It just takes time to get used to it.
You're not alone here - even if you live with your mum, talking about this stuff can seem impossible. You could try writing everything in a letter to your dad and leaving it somewhere for him? Or even writing a letter addressed to someone else - for example a friend - and leave it lying somewhere in the house where your dad'll find it. He might not actually bring it up (as the letter wasn't addressed to him and so he shouldn't have read it) but he might start buying you the things you need.
Alternatively, you can actually get a free sample pack of pads and pantyliners from the Bodyform site (Bodyform's a company that makes female hygiene products in case you don't know). Just go here and fill in the form:
http://www.bodyform.co.uk/Pages/Products/OrderSamples.aspx?id=1459
Of course, you can't just keep ordering free samples forever! But maybe you can have these as a backup in case your periods start before you've been able to talk to your dad about buying pads.
Best of luck with this, it sucks that you've only got your dad to talk to but you've got some options and I'd place money on your dad reacting really well. Plus, whatever embarrassment you feel will disappear quickly once everything's out in the open. Millions of women have gone before you in having to say that awful word 'period' to a parent, and they've all come out of it fine!
Hope it all works out! xx
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ok, well i have 2 brothers 1 of them is a twin with me and we share a room. The second one is always an asshole and never leaves me alone, my twin and I are about to lose our heads!!! We try letting him in are room and work things out but he is so anoying! we are all about the same age 13-14 the ass hole is 14 but we dont get along! You know how when you say that you hate your mom or dad or sibling, well i really hate my brother! Ive hated him my whole life! What can i do to resolve this issue? (link)
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First off, I really, really feel for you and totally relate to where you're coming from. I hated my brother and he filled me with such rage that I remember screaming, throwing stuff all over the place and trying to attack him (and this is completely out of character - I'm actually quite a calm person with a good temper)! However, most of the time I remember that his behaviour wasn't even bad enough to shout, scream, kick and throw things - it was really, REALLY annoying stuff that I had to just put up with because if I'd kicked my brother's face in for it my parents would actually have killed me.
This is the best advice I can give you - fight him with his own medicine. If he constantly acts like a child and does stuff deliberately to piss you off, you can really piss HIM off by suddenly turning into an adult, along with your twin, and either not responding or walking out. I know it sounds like the hardest thing in the world, and that often it doesnt even seem possible, but if you can ever do this, try it. Nothing will make him look stupider (especially as he's meant to be a year older than you).
Try spending quality time with your twin. If your brother sees you two having a laugh about something or making something together, I'm willing to bet that your brother will initially try to mess it up or annoy you both - when this happens, loudly suggest to your twin that you go out to the mall/out for a walk together. Don't get mad, don't respond to your brother, just walk right out and continue having a good time without him. Everyone wants to be liked (even your brother) so seeing his two siblings walk out and ignore him will hit him like a brick wall, and he might actually start thinking about trying to get on with you and your twin instead of being an asshole.
Here's the best bit. Even if you can't ever get on with your brother and he pisses you off for the next five years - at the end of them, you don't have to talk to him ever again. I know this sounds horrible, but the day my brother went to university was one of the happiest days of my life. I finally felt I was free and could do whatever the hell I wanted in my house without him ruining it. One day, either he or you will leave to go to college, get a job or whatever, and for as long as you want you can get on with your life without him spoiling it. Then, after a few years, he probably will have grown up and you might find you get on really well.
Good luck with this, I know it really sucks but there's light at the end of the tunnel! x
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Whenever i shave the hair starts growing back in about 6 hours aaaand you can feel it and its gross! How can i make it not come back and how do you keep a tan? Does shaving cause it to go away faster? thanks
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I hate this problem, it's so annoying. The waxing idea is great, but it's kinda expensive and I've actually found that the hair comes back pretty quickly even when I wax. As for keeping a tan, you can forget it with a wax as it takes off the first layer of skin cells (and therefore your tan). The best way I've found is to epillate. An epillator is a small hand-held machine that looks and sounds like an electric razor, but instead of cutting off the hairs it pulls them out, like loads of little tweezers all over your leg. I know it sounds horrible, and it has got a terrible reputation, but it's by far the cheapest, most effective way to get them out. It has the same effect as waxing (longer period of time without hair growing back, gradual thinning of hair growth the more you do it) but it's free once you've bought the epillator and it won't take off your tan! The 'pain' is totally exaggerated as well; honestly, you get used to the sensation within a minute and after that it just feels like tiny, quick little pin pricks. You can pick up an epillator at any good healthcare or beauty store (eg Boots/Superdrug if you live in Britain). Hope that helps! x
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"There's aso an 'airstrip' or 'runway', which is when it's all waxed off except a vertical strip of hair, like a little runway. the normally triangular shape of hair you can see on the front of your body is reduced to a far smaller, but still vaguely triangular shape. "
that has nothing to do with the TYPE of wax. those can be done with a brazillian wax. and the triangle thing IS a bakini wax. (link)
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Nah, I agree if you want an airstrip you could say 'a brazilian' but you'd have to specify; a brazilian means all the hair off so I think the 'airstrip' thing is a valid thing to mention. And yes, a plain bikini wax would obviously leave a triangular shape. As I said, asking for an airstrip gives you a far smaller triangular shape.
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What is the difference between all the different kinds of bikini waxes? (link)
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There's also an 'airstrip' or 'runway', which is when it's all waxed off except a vertical strip of hair, like a little runway. the normally triangular shape of hair you can see on the front of your body is reduced to a far smaller, but still vaguely triangular shape.
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I have this huge pimple right on my forhead since I woke up this morning. It sucks because that draws all the attention when someones tlakign to me. Plus I'm going to a party tonight and I need to get rid of it before then! I have like 7-8 hours to get rid of this thing. It doesn't have a white head and it's swallon a lil. It's red too! AHHH help please. What can I do to make it go away as fast as possible! Thanks (link)
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DONT SQUEEZE IT!!!!!! Touching it at all will make it glow red. I used to have not one of the bastards, but loads all over my face. Concealer is the way to go - dab it, or foundation if you don't have concealer, all over the thing. If you're still not happy, count your blessings that it's on your forehead and use your hair!!! Can you sweep it across your forehead like a side-swept fringe? Or can you wear a hat to the party? Or a pretty headband or little scarf as part of your outfit? But DON'T touch it!! x
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uuugh i think i gained weight since summer started, even though i've been more active. i was trying on jeans the other day and they seem smaller from the end of school. its basically only my lower stomach/sides and my upper thighs. everytime i try to eat healthier and not as often and excercise i can never stick to i t and its soo frustrating because i try on clothes and i feel like nothing looks good. i went running one morning but it felt weird because im only 13 and the only people who run/walk in my neighborhood are like, old. i reallly want to look better for when i go back to school, but idk how. what are some tips that you know work, and pleeease be specific! thank youu :) (link)
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First off: don't worry and don't go doing anything drastic: you're young and your body is gonna be changing a lot at the moment so this probably isnt a permanent thing. Also, what you're talking about is SO common - you'll be hard pushed to find a woman without a little bit of flesh around her tummy and hips, so don't fret - you're perfectly normal (it's also perfectly normal to find the whole diet-and-exercise thing impossible, I haven't succeeded yet either). I know this sounds weird, but if there are stairs in your house you can use them as gym equipment! No one can see you, and you can try doing step-ups (great for ass and thighs) or just walk or run up and down them, say, thirty times. You'd be surprised how much hard work it is! For a more toned stomach (though you've gotta remember, only a few lucky cows don't have to fight this all their lives), sit-ups or 'crunches' are really the only way to go. If you don't know exactly how to do them, LOOK IT UP on google, or go here:
http://www.youngwomenshealth.org/fitness/ti_situp.html
cos you can really mess up your back and neck if you do them wrongly. If you find them really hard at first try wedging your feet underneath a piece of furniture then trying again. If all this sounds boring as hell, you could just go swimming. It's way more fun and works out your entire body without you having to struggle and sweat, and will make you look brilliant all over. If you swim regularly though, protect your hair!! There are plenty of gels and stuff that do the trick. Whatever you choose to do, don't expect immediate results and don't go over-doing it - you're young and probably way more attractive than you think you are at the moment. My final advice: whatever you do, don't under any circumstances start denying yourself food. Fatty food is healthy in moderation, you NEED it to look good, just don't eat too much. Especially at thirteen, you need a balanced diet or you'll mess up your body and I promise you it's not worth it. Don't leave anything out, it's unhealthy and unnecessary. Hope you feel better about yourself soon, I bet you're gorgeous. Good luck. x
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