about

My name is Laura and I'm happy to help out with questions if you're asking about a subject I happen to be familiar with. I work at an agency that assists victims of domestic violence and sexual assault, so I'm able to answer questions about those kinds of situations. However, I'll often simply refer people to an agency like the one I work for in their area*, it's usually the best advice I can give. I can also answer most questions about positive dating and sexual relationships, including safe sex. I'm a big fan of the political system so I can answer general questions about that as well, although I won't do your homework for you. My other interests include houseplants, hermit crabs and kiwi fruit. Ask away!


*If I tell you to seek help from a domestic violence or sexual assault agency in your area and you're not sure where one is or where to find out, feel free to ask me. Just let me know what city and state (or country, if ouside the US) you live in and I'll give you full contact information for the agency closest to you that will provide the services you need. If you're concerned about privacy, I'm happy to send you the information without posting it on my column, just let me know if that's what you want.


National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233


National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE

advice

22f
I was in an intense relationship with a pretty disturbed guy for 3 months. He frequently encouraged me to kill myself and was pretty abusive. I don't want to see him again but I still have his jumper and want to return it as I don't like it around and don't want to throw it out(it would give him a reason to contact me again, I've tried to sever all contact) --the only mutual friend we have is his ex and I never told her I was seeing him.
I would send it to him but he's moving house...any suggestions?

It's wise for you to want to avoid contact with this man. It's simply not safe to be around an abusive person or allow him to speak to you. Personally, I would recommend throwing the jumper in the trash, unless you think he could use it as an excuse to contact you later. If you don't want to get his ex involved and feel like you want to give the jumper back to him, consider shipping it to some place where he'll find it. You could send it to his work address, the home of a relative, or even anonymously to his ex.

[view]

(Rating: 5) Thankyou for your thoughtful and supportive answer :)
<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
eXTReMe Tracker