about

I am a 27 year old female from Scotland. I have a lot of life experience and will do my best to answer any questions you have honestly.

advice

I really want to permanently dye my hair! It's not a big difference. My hair right now is light brown/dark blonde and I want to dye it dark/medium brown. My mom let me dye it and it stayed in for 28 days. I REALLY LIKED IT!!! how can I get her to let me dye it permanently? any tips?

My advice is not to dye it permanently as you may want to change your hair colour at a later date and should you decide to go a lighter colour it would be impossible without bleach bathing your hair to strip the colour out.

Dry, frazzled hair is never a good look so stick with the semi-permanent colours which will give you a nice glossy finish and that way you can change your colour to whatever you like every 28 days.

Sorry this wasn't the advice that you wanted to hear it's just that I made the mistake of dyeing my hair almost black around a year before my wedding and was really upset when I decided to go back to my original colour.

I guess if you are really sure that you want to dye it permanently which pretty much means forever then you need to let your Mum know that you have thought very seriously about this. Perhaps compromise with her....say that you will continue to use semi-permanent dye for the next three months to make sure that you really really like it and if after that time you still do then it would be nice if she could accept that you have made a mature and rational decision and allow you to dye it permanently.

Hope that helped a little more.

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Ok, I'm sorry, but this question may be a little disturbing to some of you. But I REALLY need some help here. I just gave my boyfriend a blow job, and I'm scarred to death whats going to happen as the results. I really don't want to get herpes. When I came home I brushed my teeth really good and washed my mouth out with water and soap. I know a little paranoid. But I know the symptoms, but are they REALLY visible? Also, how long will it take for me to notice if I by chance do get them? I think they are caused by if your partner has some sort of disease.. but he never told me he had any. If any one can answer this, i'd really appreciate it. Thanks so much! =)

You can indeed contract STD's from oral sex.

If this guy has never had sex with anyone else then you are safe however if he has it may be best, and just to put your mind at ease, that you visit a GUM clinic.

For future reference, if you are with a guy whose sexual history you are unsure of, use a condom whether having penatrative or oral sex (if using condoms for oral sex I would recommend a flavoured one as normal ones can taste quite nasty) - if he tells you it "doesn't feel as good" tell him he is spouting rubbish and walk away. That kind of guy clearly has no respect for your wellbeing.

If you are with someone on a long term basis and you do not wish to use contraception (which is not a good idea if you don't want to become pregnant etc) then both of you should visit the GUM clinic to be tested for STD's as this will give you both peace of mind before and after any intimate situations.

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A few years ago, my grandmother passed away after a long illness. My family was devastated,especially my grandfather. Some time passed and he met "Teri". She is 30 years younger than him,in fact she's 3 years younger than his youngest daughter. Teri does various drugs and has been in jail for larceny. While out on probation this past Christmas, she stole my grandpa's car and his ATM card. The car was recovered Around New Years, she stole more money from him (he forgave her) and wound up in jail somehow. Now my grandpa is tens of thousands of dollars in debt as he pays her bills off (which includes lawyers to get her out of jail),as well as his own. He makes very little money as it is. He's come to all of us for loans. We're a close family and we only want what's best for him. We want him to cut this woman out of his life and all of the negative influence that comes with it. I realize this might be a delayed reaction to the grief of losing my grandmother. All attempts to talk to him about it result in him saying "you don't understand her" or "don't worry about it." what do we do?

Perhaps that it would be best to take the tough love approach. As hard as it may seem, if the family continue to support him (financially) supporting her then he will continue to be blinded.

In all likliness this is a delayed reaction to your grandmother's passing and he will be extremely flattered by the attention of a woman so much younger than himself.

I know that it will be hard however, for his own sake, the next time he asks for a loan to help out his girlfriend say no! In saying this, I do not mean for you to let him become destitute or such like - if he needs groceries, buy them for him - if he needs clothes dry cleaned take them with yours and pay for it if you feel you need to.

Although this may seem harsh it may be just what he needs to see that he is at risk of losing everyone that he cares about or worse still, losing himself amongst all the craziness and wrecklessness this woman has brought to his life. There is no way that you can continue to aide him in supporting this tyrant of a woman and expect him to see clearly that she is no good for him.

When he says that you don't understand tell him that you do. At the moment he needs to feel needed as he probably feels very lonely since your grandmother passed (no disrespect meant to you or your family but there are certain things that people only share with their partners). Perhaps he did a lot of things for your grandmother and looked after her during her illness and feels that he no longer has a purpose to his days. Get him to cut the grass (if he is able), look after the children or anything else that he may enjoy. Most importantly make him feel needed - you and your family may wish to wrap him in cotton wool and feel bad about asking him to do these things but men (especially older men) have a distinct yearning to be needed/useful and to have a purpose.

He will feel that he has no companion to share things with however, the hard task is getting him to see that the things he needs will never come from this woman and that this woman will never be deserving of all the things he wants to give.

I hope this has helped and please let me know how things turn out.

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what are the bad sides to weed? dangers?

Weed causes mood swings, low mood, depression and study's show that in the longer term it can also lead to mental health problems such as bi-polar personality disorder and schizophrenia.

My advice......steer well clear of weed and any other drug for that matter.

If you want to experiment try the herbal ones, they work just as well, if not better - you can find them on the net and they have been tested very thoroughly for long and short term side effects.

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I was on a plane coming home and this girl was in front of me and she had her Mac laptop. I looked at it and she had some kind of software up where there's a video camera and it takes pictures, and then you can edit it and make it cool. Like 3-d, or warp it. I can't really explain it but It was cool. anyone know what this is called and if It works on PC?

Try my heritage.com. Although you cannot download any software you can use tools on the site to warp pics that you already have on your pc. You can also upload a pic of yourself to see which celebs you look like or even morph into one!

Sorry about my typo - it is www.myheritage.com.

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After many people have told me that I should keep doing what I am doing, (posing as a 13 year old girl on chat sites, tracking and logging potential sexual predators), I have decided to keep doing it.

I even started a website about it, and I modeled it after, perverted-justice.com. On my site, I show the chat conversations and I give the predator's MSN screen name.

Some people have told me it's wrong to give out these people's MSN addresses. Someone even said I could get into a lot of trouble, or arrested for it. But shouldn't I be allowed to put potential predator's screen names up to warn people? They're the ones that started talking to an alleged 13 year old. What do you think?

Congratulations to you for taking a pro-active stance against sexual predators!!!!

It does concern me a little however that in doing so you may be putting yourself at risk as it may be traced back to you.

Is there anyway that you could join an organisation or even talk to preverted-justice.com about how to set yourself up safely?

In the UK sexual predators are "protected" and although we have a Sexual Offenders Register the information is not made avialable to members of the public. I honestly do believe that these sexual predators should be named and shamed in order that no other child should suffer at their hands.

It is children who need to be protected and I have to say that if, by putting a predator's screen name on your site, you have saved even just one child the agony of a such a cruel and horrible experience then I have to say - you have done the right thing.

Take care!

Indigo

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Hey dudes and dudettes ,

Okay well this is a follow up question to the one before which was :
Heyy Dudes & Dudettes ,

Okay , Well see theres this guy he's my ex and I still really like him.. and I just started to talk to him not to long ago .. and like he's always liked me but I don't know if he still does.. so I decided to be like hey im going to invite him to go to the movies and stuff so I called him and stuff and he calls me back and says sure :) and stuff like that .. is there any possibilty that maybe in the future he would go back out with me?

Thank you.
Betty.

and you guys wrote back that he might and stuff well I still likes him but not until now because I found out he HAS a gf and he didnt tell me.. should I just move on or no?


Thank, Betty.

Hi Betty

When you first break up with someone you remember all the bad things that they did but in time you start to get over it. That's when you start to remember all the good times and wish that you could get back together.

I think that it is safe to say that in this respect both of you have moved on however, as this guy has a new girlfriend I would probably just stay friends with the guy and have fun getting to know new people.

Unfortuntely, in life, going backwards is not usually a good thing. Sometimes getting back with an ex will work but more often than not, you can't recreate the good times and the bad times are too often thrown back in one anothers face.

I think it would be best to appreciate this guy for what he is, or what he will be and that is an excellent, life long friend.

Hope this helped.

Indigo

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hi, well my freind has been having family problems, and today he told me that he prayed a lot to god, to sort it out and what not, and when he got home, he told me that they were sorting it out, and it was getting better. is this the work of "the allmighty" or just a quencidence, because im not fully persuaded? what do you guys think? thanks

Now this is a tough question!!!

It really depends on your own religious views.

I guess you could call me a spiritualist however, I tend to draw from many different religions as ultimately in my mind they all teach the same thing, be a good person, be good to one another and be happy and therefore I have never felt the need to go to church etc to be close to God, he is always around - even when you think that he has left you!

Even people who don't believe in any being "speak" to someone/something in times of trouble.

I would never say that any religion is wrong. Ultimately I believe that whatever the religion people follow, they believe in the same being.

It is my belief that in life you get what you give. For instance, your friend had been praying for his family to work things out, therefore he would have been sending positive energy out relating to his family. I believe that the Universe, God, Allah or whatever name you would like to use sent back this positivity to his family in abundance.

Hope this helped.

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im pretty into clothes that you would see models or celebs wearing. are there any stores or websites that arent expensive that would be good to shop at?

An excellent site for you to visit would be www.asos.com. They have loads of items that are affordable and they either sell the exact garment that a celeb has been seen wearing or will provide an extremely similar equivalent.

Happy shopping.

Indigo

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Okay, for all my life I have been hiding the fact that I am gay. For some reason I like men, But I don't want to I don't even admit this. But this has to stop right away. I don't want to be gay I want to be straight PLZ PLZ Tell me a way this can be cured I want to be straight Not gay*

I am so sorry that you are having such a difficult time with your sexuality.

Many people deal with feelings like these when they are growing up however it does not necessarily mean that you are gay. You really need to seek out some advice from an organisation in your area who can help you understand the feelings that you have. They will be able to offer you lots of advice and support.

I must stress to you however, that if you are in fact gay, it has no bearing on you as a person other than this is your sexuality.

You, like every other individual on this planet has right to be who they are and of course to be wonderful with it.

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if i made a dildo out of clay(im underage, crafty and horny), so if i made one out of clay would that be safe to use?

I certainly would not recommend making a dildo out of clay. Dildo's that you buy are made of non-porous materials that do not harbour bacteria etc and must also be cleaned using special wipes/lotions.

I understand what it is like to be "horny" as you say but my advice would definitely be to improvise until you are old enough to buy one.

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Was it bad for me to ask my boyfriend to get condoms? So that he could try them on. He said he knows how to do it but he never tried.. So I made him buy some to practice putting on so he doesn't rip it or anything.

It seems a little weird.

Can the condom tear when you put it on?

Most difinitely not - there are so many risks out there - pregnancy, chlamydia and gonorrhea to name but a few.

I think that whether you and your boyfriend have had sex with other partners or not you have been extremely sensible in asking him to practice putting on a condom. It may also be an idea for you to learn how to do this too as neither partner should bear the whole responsibility for contraception. If you want to practice - use a banana.

Condoms can tear when you put them on if you use the incorrect method and I am sure that neither or you would wish to be in that situation.

Well done for taking control of your sex life!

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okay so i meet quite a few guys regularly with one of my groups of friends...but theres my friend from my other group who i LOVE shes exactly like me and im super close to her who i always end up introuducing to them...but what she does is ends up becoming closer than me with them, then for some reason they go from likeing me as more then friends, to her. But the thing that i dont understand is im defniatly better looking then her (im not being cocky, but its true) and i cant figure out why. i know its not the personality cuase were both confident and have very similar personalitys. The only thing i can think of is that i have braces and she doesnt...but they arnt noticeable like at all...also im more crazy and daring then her....can someone pleasee help me i cant figure out why this is happening and it always hurts me cuase i like the guys before they switch to her...and shes never had a boyfriend and doesnt intend to. sorry its so long. thanks in advance

Maybe the crazy and daring thing makes them see you as a "friend" more as it may portray you to be a bit of a tomboy. No offence!

Perhaps you should just learn to relax in their company and not try to impress them by being too crazy - guys sometimes find that a bit scary.

I know you say that you love this friend dearly however, even though she does not intend to have a boyfriend as such, it may be possible that she is a little jealous of the attention you receive in the first instance from these boys.

I really think the main focus for both you and your friend should be on having fun. There is no point in falling in love/liking these guys so readily just because you receive a lot of attention from them - my Mum's old saying comes to mind - "play with fire and you will get burnt". The right guy is out there for you and when you do meet him he will only have eyes for you.

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