aliarrogancexx's advice column

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Q: i basically live off of poptarts and ramon noodle soup im now discovering how unhealthy i eat.. i feel like everything is high in fructose corn syrup or whatever. so are poptarts really that bad for you too? whats healthy food too snack on, like what about powerbars??

poptarts are actually really high in fat, sugar, and calories. you could eat a whole can of progresso soup for whats in just ONE poptart :p im currently dieting, and ive been trying to eat alot healthier. power bars are meant for athletes, who have a much higher muscle mass. so for you it would probably just be the same as eating a snickers haha. some healthy snacks i try to eat are baby carrots, cucumbers in olive oil and vinigar (its actually good), low sodium and calorie soups (such as progresso), light yogurt, fiber snacks, light butter popcorn, granola, cereal (kashi), chex mix, trial mix, and roasted/toasted nuts. if your really craving something like chips, lays makes healthy(er) baked chips, which go good with salsa (also good for you). basically all processed foods have an unhealthy something in them. so try to eat raw foods like veggies and home-cooked meals. also try to get fiber - it helps cleanse your body of fat and keeps you "regular" haha xD anyways, im sorry this is so long. hope i helped :)

Q: i'm not really asking too much for advice, but more of an opinion and what you think. so heres my story (17f&17m):

i dated this guy for 8 months and we broke up the last week of april...he said he doesn't have the same feelings for me. however, we went to prom together and i was laying on this guy cause i wasn't feeling good and he was off doing his own thing...and he got upset at me for that...we both decided that itd be best for us not to talk until summer starts (which is in like a month from now) then he wants to start hanging out again as friends and he said "if its meant to be, it'll be". we started going out during the summer of last year and i was thinking of doing something cute when we hang out to realize why he fell for me last summer. i really love this kid and he treats me right. so what do you think i should do with this whole situation..is there anything that can boost our chances of getting back together?

oh and should i text him first when school ends? and how long should i wait? or should i let him text me?

ok well theres a few things i can deffinetly tell you. one is that you have to give him time to miss you. so as to texting him first, id let him text you. and it reallly sucks to wait around for him to, but it'll be worth it in the end. another thing, is if you want him back, you have to be the same girl he fell in love with. everyone changes during long relationships, and it takes guts to admit you have. (i just went through all this with my bf) so basically you have to be your old self. and i think a really cute thing to do to hang out is to maybe go where your first date was. or wear his favorite perfume, shirt, etc. a good thing to do is mirror him. i dont think im going to explain it right, so you should google it. search something like "mirroring people." ive used it; it works. its basically just body language, and you copy theirs. google will explain it better. im not very good at organizing my advice lol sorry. but i really hope i helped; let me know :) 17/f

Q: This is so complicated and BAD!!!
Well i live in ______, i havnt dated anyone for 1 year 5 months and 16 days, yes i have been counting and i hate dating, i don't think i should date if it's not going to be worth it, and i love being single.

Until this guy who blew my mind away, very good looking *drools* now here is the problem that i believe i cannot solve but i need help to get over it.

Well it all started the day i had a fight with my sister's boyfriend or fiance now. Well my sister did something and i told my sister's boyfriend (S)' bestfriend (B) who is also my bestfriend (B is a guy and im a girl), So B was extremely drunk and YES accidently (i trust B badly) told S, so my sister was mad, and because i did something like that to her and she can loose her boyfriend because of it, i had to fix it, so i told S i was lying.

From that day he doesn't speak to me and on the phone he told me "Do not ever talk to me again, i'm like a stranger to you, you're nothing but a liar"

anyways B would go out with S sometimes and sometimes with me.

Everyone thinks B loves me and that i love him back, but my feelings towards him is only friendship (then later i discovered he had feelings for me)

Once it was me and B just hanging out and we were bored, so we were like why don't we fool everyone and say we are dating, so i was like okay why not?

Anyways we said only for 3 days and then thats it.

But the joke was taking too long, and in front of people we acted as if we're dating and shit.

Until S got mad at B because he goes out with me more than him, and they stopped talking.

So S now is mad at me and B. anyways

Here where the only guy who managed to blow my mind comes in the picture who we will call M

I met M with some friends who is also S's friends and B's also.

One day me and M we're chatting on MSN and he asked if im single so i said yeah and that i dont date.

That was after the joke in couple of days (i totally forget about the joke)

Then afterwards he asked me if im dating B and i couldnt say yes because i had feelings for him and also because the day before i told him i don't date much and shit.

But he promised me he won't tell anyone.

He calls me like EVERYDAY, In an hour he leaves me 22 missed calls, he is the sweetest EVER. He is everything i want in life, he is amazing. and yes i fell head over heels in love with him.

then he admited he likes me, and i said it back to him. (until now noone knows about me and M)

And like when we're hanging out with friends he would hold my hand under the table and etc...

Once day i was tipsy and extremely happy because of M and i told B everything. but not the part that i like him too.

Next day was M's birthday, me and B went out to eat sushi, and B convinced me that M doesnt like me and that S had a deal with M to play with my feelings and as if im cheating on B in front of everyone so everyone would say "HAHA ___ the girl you'd leave me for is cheating on you" (No one knows the dating thing is a joke )

I 50/50 believed him, and B was like really demanding that i would stay away from M and he made me feel like shit and i couldn't tell him i like M.

I had to avoid M, and not even look him in the eye (we were in a bar for his birthday)

So the day after M's birthday and that is today, M called me 100 of times and i didnt answer, and he texted me alot asking whats wrong and etc... i felt so guilty

Me and B decided we would take O's and C's advice, surprisingly O and C said "M actually likes you but S convinced him to get you and S thinks you guys are dating and if you don't actually care about M just call him and tell him you dont have feelings for and just stay away"

So i was like no and shit, and O was like "why? it's not like you like him and you don't want everyone to say shit about B "

so i was like okay, i was trying to prove i don't actually like M

so i called him in front of the three of them and put it loudspeaker "hey" "hey" "how r u?" good n u" "good" "ookay M listen" "yeah" "Um, forget about us, just stay away from me and let it go" "why ____" "just let go" "fine" "bye" "bye" then he closed

so B was like "Why didnt you tell him the reason is because you don't like him"

i was like "i don't know, what? you want me to call him back "
he was like "No send him a message"

so i texted M "the reason is i have no feelings for u just stay away"

he texted me back "im fine with it! but you could've said it in a better way! thanks"

I felt like the biggest asshole and i couldn't do anything about it. I'm even scared to trust M, i'm starting to hate my 2 years bestfriend B because sometimes i would feel he tell people off because he wants me for himself.

When i went back home, M's Status on facebook was "What happened is funny, this world is weird"

I know i have to get over him, because i can't let B down and I can't let people know about us because i already said i don't like him and a lot of other reasons.

I don't want to solve the problem i just want to live with it.

well im really confused, and some of what i say is probably going to be irrelevant, but ive been in a similar sounding situation. all i can really say is that you have to come out and be honest. to EVERYONE about EVERYTHING. if you dont, more drama will start. id almost guarentee it. no matter what, you'll just have to set the record straight. you'll probably piss some people off; and you might lose a friend; it all depends. but it sounds like the biggest issue is who do you like more, B or M? and S kinda sounds like a two-faced ass, but thats just my opinion. and if this whole thing started out with something your sister did, you need to talk to her about all this too. i really hope i helped, even though im not sure i fully understand everything haha :) 17/f

Q: Is following people from site to site called cyberstalking and is cyberbullying when people harass and bash you on various sites online for no reason? ? thanks. Anyways, I have an ex friend who just wont leave me and my friends alone after telling her to please stop and move on with her life and all. She is now being a cyberbully by calling us names and all and harassing on on various sites and all. yesterday I found out she joined a few sites because we are on there. I blocker her, but she is calling us names on those sites as well. We are ignoring her yes, but she is harassing/Stalking us by folowing and joining sites we are on and also replying to stuff we dont want her too. So what should we do besides ignoring her? we did all we can to ignore her. I mean she wont stop talking crap about us in her journals and all and we been ignoring her til she followed us and joined some sites we are on and is harassing/stalking us. Im thinking of filing a report because we have proof shes doing this to us and all, but should I? also if I took her to court and all would I have to pay, etc? We told her many times to just stop and she wont. Shes harassing us, following us to sites and all and just wont stop and leave us alone after we told her we dont want to be her friend for the things she done to us and all and she wont leave us alone. We havent done anything wrong to her and we have been ignoring til the latest incident where she is now joining sites we are on and harassing us. Also if there is any sites I can report her on, give me some sites, thanks. Thanks for any kind of advice.

yes, thats cyper-stalking/bullying. and its illegal. on most share sites such as myspace, facebook, etc usually have a little link that says report abuse at the bottom of the sites homepage. and if you go to your school principle, explain the situation, and show proof (printed out pages,) then she can get in ALOT of trouble. and you can ask to be anonymous. im not sure about the whole court thing. you could always get a restraining order, if you want to go that far. hope i helped :) 17/f

Q: quakers chewy bar.. are they healthy or not?

theyre not that bad, just pretty high in sugar, which could turn to fat. theyre usually under 150 calories, so yes, theyre healthy in a way. compared to alot of other snacks. im dieting and i eat them, if that helps. 17/f

Q: Is it possible for a girl to have more than one orgasm within a short period of time?

yes, theyre called multiple orgasms. i dont know how to have them, they kind of just happen. i know positive thinking helps. basically if you dont believe you can have multiple orgasms, you wont. just keep doing whatever feels best. 17/f

Q: Hi. , I'm doing an article in our school magazine. I really need some battle of the sexes challenges! Can you please give me any ideas. The challenges are from physical, mental, psycological, and emotional

some of these might be a little lame lol...sorry. but theres the classics, (tug of war, musical chairs) scavenger hunts. those common sense brain teasers like "which weighs more, a pound of feathers or a pound of bricks." we did that in class, guys against girls with one constant person asking the question. or you could have a guy and girl square off in chess, checkers, a drawing competition...etc. 17/f

Q: can vaseline be used as a lube? .. is it safe to rub it on my clit?

i realllly wouldnt. vaseline locks in germs, and could give you a vag infection - something i highly doubt you want haha. nevver use vaseline with condoms either, as they break down the latex theyre made of. the best lube is something thats MADE to be used as personal lube. such as K.Y, or wet. if you dont have any, use your own. the vagina naturally produces lube (how girls get "wet") you just have to be aroused enough for it to come out. but yes, vaseline is a bad idea. 17/f

Q: everytime i have a problem my friend A always asks me whats wrong and stuff but i always avoid her when i have a problem since i dont really wanna talk about it and she says"you always do this but its okay, i wont give up on you" what is she trying to say?

maybe shes sick of feeling so untrusted. idk, it IS a really weird thing to say. it sounds like shes trying to say something like you dont trust her with your problems, but she'll be friends with you anyways? sorry i cant give much more insight. thats about all i can think of. 17/f

Q: ok so after my period i had this really weird dishcharge and it hasnt gone away. And it smells is this a bad thing??? its like your normal dishcharge but ive never had it smell. ive had sex but we used protection. should i be worried??? thanks! =]

eh the vaginas usually a little smelly and weird after youve just had your period. especially if you had sex. vaginas get smelly during the period uh, period. but i wouldnt worry. unless it smells ridiculous freakin terrible and is green or yellow-ish tinted. just keep an eye on it. it should go away soon, but it sounds fine. try douching? haha maybe, ive never used it. 17/f

Q: my friend is doing weed and she has a drug test she needs to pass and she wants to know how you get weed out of your system and how long it should take?

you can buy drug testing kits online that'll get you clean. or goldenseal. drinking lots of goldenseal tea will help you get clean in 2-3 weeks. the kits probably work faster though. 17/f

Q: 20/f. Basically, I have a smelly vagina. And I don't know how to get rid of it. I always wash down there but even when I get out of the shower, if I spread my legs just a little bit, you can smell it. And even when I'm at work if I've been sitting for long periods of time my crotch and the chair will smell bad and its embarrassing. If I sit down too fast the odor will arise and then people can smell it.
When I go to the bathroom, my underwear is ALWAYS damp/moist and there will be a small trace of white. Not like, a lot of discharge, but always a little trail of white.

What is my problem? How can I have a "semi-normal" vagina. One that doesn't smell and one that doesn't get moist (thats probably where the odor rises from).

I refuse to douche.

if you shave off all your pubes, it cuts down on odor because theres no place for icky stuff to collect. ive found washing down there with shaving cream helps too. and if its that bad, you might want to go to the gyno and get it checked out, along with an annual pap smear. and you might want to just give douching a try. ive never used it, but it might help. 17/f

Q: hi i am 15 female and am going to puerto rico next week, where the sun is very strong. poeple tell me its healthy to go tanning at a salon just a couple times before you go to a tropical place so you dont get burnt. is this true ? please let me know!

well going to a tanning bed is never technically good for you, but im not going to tell you not to go haha. yes, it should be fine, because it provides a base tan. so no, its not bad for you :) 17/f

Q: Is it ok to stop taking birth control for good if i started it a week and a half ago? Its making me moody so i want to get off it.

it should be ok...but some prescriptions like birth control can make you have period-like sypmtoms for the first month or so, then they go away. they might cause moodiness and spotting (normal pms stuff) so if i were you i would just keep taking it and wait it out, but thats up to you :) 17/f p.s ive been on bc for a year so i had this happen

Q: 13/f.

I shop at hollister and abercrombie and all those places but i kinda want to change like my style to scene or skater? Like i love alternaive music ans stuff also. But where do i buy these clothes? && i want to slowl ease into this because i dont want to one day show up being skater when the day before i was preppy?

I like skiny jeans, etnies, and alternative musice also.( i also like pop, miley cyrus, hollister, talor swift)?

im scene :) so i can help haha. some really good places to shop are hot topic, pacsun, journeys, wet seal, rue 21, and debs (skinny jeans.) oh and calling yourself scene is frowned upon...just fyi :) thrift stores are also great places to get "scene" clothes. try looking up internet "scene queens" i.e kiki kannibal, dakota rose, audrey kitching, and jac vanek. put yourself on websites such as myspace, bebo, and facebook. cut your own hair, and get the "scene hair style." a great place to learn all this is to google "how to be scene" and the best page is a wiki article. vintage jewelery, big hair, and bright colors are your friends. make music your life. but dont change overnight, bc then youll be seen as a poseur. go to urbandictionary.com to learn scene lingo. use x's in your usernames. or use a word that begins with the same letter as your name (Ex: aliarrogancexx) :) but that wiki article will most deffff help. 17/f :]

Q: i wanted to know wat the longest lasting mint flavored gum or mint is to have after eating.

stride gum, ice breakers mints, and mentos gum. all these are great :)

Q: im 16/f and i think my teeth are a little too big
if i want my teeth smaller, do i have to get surgery or what can the do to shrink it a little

unfortunatly i dont think teeth can be shrunk, unless you get them ground down, which is a verrry bad idea. unless your gums are receding due to gingevitis or something like that, then im afraid your stuck with youre teeth. 17/f

Q: I just really need to find what the best smelling and longest lasting body wash. i also wanted to know what the best thing to use to apply the body wash.

try anything from bath and body. theyre in pretty much every mall. everything in there smells amazzingg :) victorias secret has some really good stuff too. for a cream body wash i just use my hands, and for liquid i used one of those scrubby gloves. although their stuff smells so strong itll stay on anyways :) 17/f

Q: so i have extremely pale skin,
its so white it looks like milk
well im going tanning, and the first couple timesi went into the booth, it was a lay down one, i only went in for like 5 minutes just because i didnt know how my skin would react
so my question is how long should i go into the booth for? and should i use like lotion or oil or what?

A usual tanning session if your just starting out is about 15 minutes. i would recomend ocean potion deep tanning products like tanning accelorator, but ONLY after your skin is noticeably darker - a base tan. until then, use a spf 4 so you wont burn. only for the first few times, then it should be safe to use any dark tanning accelorator :) 17/f

Q:
16/f
this is a bit awkward but after i masturbate i have lots of creamy white discharge. is that normal??

well when a girl gets aroused (before sex, after masturbation,etc) she gets "wet." which im assuming you know about haha. but theres all sorts of "creamy white discharge" up in the vagina anyways, so my guess is when a girl gets wet, that mixes with the other vaginal stuff and it can come out at weird times; like after you masturbate. ive had this happen, and i usually can feel it coming and just run to the bathroom to wipe. (embarrassing...haha) but im pretty sure this is a normal womanly thing. :)