A quick note: If I answered a question and you have further questions for me, please include a URL link to your original question(s) so that I can be sure of what we're talking about. Questions that reference something we talked about a week ago that I can't quite remember are kinda hard to answer.
Welcome to my column.
I don't apologize for my answers. I speak to the audience, and in doing so I sometimes tell the audience things they don't want to hear or cant handle.
I believe in stands on principle. I believe that doing right for the sake of doing right is a good way to live. I believe in self awareness and encourage it in others. I offer the most unbiased viewpoint I have. And yes, I am only human.
Im going to tell you what I think you need to hear. You are not supposed to take what I say and follow it. You are supposed to take what I say and _think_about_it_
Oh, and feel free to ask me questions, but netspeak, ebonics, terrible grammar, and your teen angst about a crush will be ignored.
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Member Since: July 16, 2007
Answers: 2588
Last Update: April 13, 2014
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hi im a 16 year old guy and for some reason dandruff is constantly present it went away for a while but its back again i have been using head and shoulders for the passt 2 days and its not getting any better what other prodcuts are there that truely work..and by washing my hair everyday does that not help?
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It takes more than 2 days. Keep at it.
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Hello,
I think I have a problem. I have known this guy since we were in diapers. We used to be best friends. He is so sweet and he loves the lord as much as I do. And I think that that is great. I told him how I feel ( I like him) and he told me that he wants to be friends right now but he wants to have a girlfriend when he is older. But he is flirting with me alot and he has told me that he likes me but is afraid that if we ever do break up then he thinks that we might loose our friendship. Please help me. I think thta i love him!!! (link)
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If you do date, and it eventually turns sour, yes, it will ruin the friendship.
If you do not dayte, it will eventually turn sour, and yes, it will ruin the friendship.
Long experience with friendships where there is romantic attraction tells me that they dont generally last forever unless they turn into something more than just friendship.
Every girl I have ever been friends with that I have been seriously attracted to, I am no longer friends with, save my fiance'
Im not sure how old you are, so I cant give you a bit more targeted advice, but Im guessing 13-14. If he wants to wait, wait. But if you want to date him, do so. Romantic tensions rip up friendships and if that doesnt, later when you date other people jealousy will.
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ok so the other night at a party i was sitting behind the house and it was dark out and i was with 2 of my best guy friends. well they kept going up my shorts and down my shirt but no matter how much i told them to stop the one kept touching me down there and down the back of my shorts... they kept following me and even did it secretly when ppl were around!! and then i was laying on the grown and the one guy put his thing right in my face and begged me to suck it and kept pushing it at my mouth but i locked my lips.. so im basically asking was i molested? i hate this feeling i have now (link)
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Molested is not the correct term.
Molestation is a term specifically used when an adult touches a minor and often prepubescent child in a sexual manner.
What happened to you is called "Sexual assault"
It is also a crime, unfortunately without witnesses a crime that is pretty much impossible to prove.
I hate offering this suggestion, because it never used to be neccesary, but when a guy is that insistent punch him in the balls. Seriously.
What happened to you isnt right, but only you can control a situation like that.
I would also venture to say if those were some of your best guy friends, you need to get some new standards, because horny teenaged idiots who obviously like you because they find you attractive arent what I consider decent friend material.
If someone does that in private when you did not specifically invite them, slap them. If they do it in public slap and yell.
Nothing stops a horny asshole like having everyone at a party know he was being a jerk and groping away.
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For the last few days, I've been having a hard time going to sleep. It takes me at least 1-2 hours to finally rest my mind. The cause is I have a restless mind. I think about too much such as School, Burglury and My schedule for tomorrow.
What can I do to get my mind off all these ideas so I can be able to sleep.
P.S. If I can avoid it, please don't say pills!
Age: 14/F
-Thanks! (link)
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The journal idea below me is a great idea. Its kind of like exercizing your memory and brain, work your brain out enough and it gets tired. Tired = sleep.
Other ideas.
Glass of cool water. I used to drink a glass every night, it would make me feel a little full and that would make me feel drowsy.
Exercize. Working your body out and using up energy makes it easier to sleep more soundly.
Reading. Reading helped me get to bed alot.
Fantasy. This can be any kind, Im not suggesting the more private here (as that could achieve the opposite of getting you ready for sleep)
I go over books Ive read, stories, things I enjoy. And I try to insert myself into them. I think about what it would be like to experience something from the perspectives of the main characters, other characters, or find out how I could insert myself into a story without changing the plot significantly.
I recently reread the Count of Monte Cristo (an excellent read, btw) and after I was done the next two nights before bed I fell asleep imagining what it would be like to be the main character, to go through what he went through, to experience that story first hand.
Sounds. The sound of a fan gives me something to concentrate on and it lets my thought patterns become fairly consistent, which lets me drift off.
Also, when you're awake, if something is keeping you up regularly think about it, puzzle it out.
Alot of the time when Im restless at night its because theres something on my mind I havent solved yet. Working it out helps me get back to normal sleep rythms.
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ive already asked for help and noone responded, here it is again.
im in my 40's/male. i was married for about 20 years with the most amazing women known to man.
i have cheated on her with about; 10 different girls, but only had 3 actuall girlfreinds. we have been seperated for about 1 year; im now with my girlfriend she caught me cheating on her with. she doesnt know about the others.
also my 2kids (wife) basically hate me and i never see one of them.
since no one resoponded back to me before im going to make this short.
basically, i still love my wife and im now cheating on my girlfriend with her friend. i want my wife back!!! p.s we are going through divorce. help!! (link)
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You have made your bed and now you are sleeping in it (apparently with a lot of different women)
The fact is, that while it might be possible for you to affect a positive and meaningful change in your own behavior, you probably cant do it in time to save your marriage.
My advice is let her divorce you. Because she deserves someone better than you. Harsh, yes, but thats still my opinion. Sorry =/
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I'm thirteen and I guess you could say i'm Catholic. My family goes to church every week, but I don't even feel good when I go. I feel like it's all a big lie, God and Jesus and Heaven and Hell. I mean, I think to myself, it seems kind of unreal that when you die you go to this wonderful place with God and if you don't follow all the exact rules of christianity, you go to hell with evil Satan. So you are telling me if I tell a little lie, or say "Oh my god" once, I have to burn in the depths of hell in my after life, if I don't go tell some priest all of my business and ask god to forgive me? Don't tell me that isn't true, because the 10 comandments say that. That brings me to hell. Out of the billions of people on earth, a fiery, hot place may not be scary to some. Maybe sitting in a white room with a set of rainbow blocks infront of you for eternity is hell, not being able to do anything else. But then, all of a sudden out of nowhere I get scared that that might be real, and all of a sudden I believe in god again. Can anyone help me out here? What should I believe in my situation. OH! And if you give me some quote from the bible to explain your answer, I swear I will ignore it because I can't stand that. (link)
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You sound alot like me.
The first thing you need to learn is this. You will never be sure.
I believe in God. I believe in God because I have had a few moments in my life where I truly felt touched by him. I believe in God because something about it just seems right, and whatever exists up there, the "Jesus and God" model feels correct to me.
I dont buy into 95% of the rest of christianity. If you want an explanation on that one, just go find "Jesus camp" the movie. Try not to hate your own religion too much afterwards.
Back to my original topic, you are never going to know for sure. I believe my life has been touched by God. I could be delusional. I am intelligent enough to acknowledge the fact that I am far from perfect, and perhaps I just made it up in my head for comfort.
But in the end, I believe because of what I have felt. And if Im wrong, what does it hurt?
Though, on the subjet of Heaven and Hell, most of the things your family teaches you are designed more to make you afraid to do certain things for earthly reasons than for divine will.
The church still has rules against birth control.
Why?
Becuase the way a church expands is by gaining new members. Its easier to have people born in and indoctrinated from youth than to convince adults.
Give it time, too. Youre still a kid, you arent going to be able to figure everything out right now, as much as you might like to. Its not important to have all the answers now, its more important just to set a goal of working towards finding some of them out for yourself at some point.
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do you think its fair for my dad to give me 60 dollars to spend down the shore then I only spend 10 and he makes me give the rest back ? (link)
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Is it fair?
Its not your money. He gave you money to go spend, and Im sure on some level he appreciates that he got some of it back.
If you feel like you kind of got shafted, well thats because youre looking back realizing you could have spent it all.
From now on, when your parents spoil you, enjoy it a little more. It wont last forever.
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If a girl gives a guy a Bj, can the girl get pregnant? (link)
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In practical reality, no.
A little tidbit of useful advice to go along with it.
If you dont know enough about sex to know that giving a BJ wont get you pregnant, you definitely dont know enough about sex to actually be having any of any kind.
Go Google "Sexual education" and check out.. I think its "Coolnurse.com"
This isnt the best website to provide a solid foundation of knowledge.
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