khadiya's advice column

askkhadiya

advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: Going into my juinor year,
For the past year or so every once in a while I would get a remark saying hey Jane "when are you going to give me that blowjob I've been asking for?" or like "Go f*ck yourself!" And I've had enough of this, I don't have any friends at this school (not to mention it's a private school) and everyone there is just really mean to me. I've joined organizations to make friends and stuff, and I have, but its hard when they don't go to your school. Overall, I am a nice person, and I've had the reputation of being that person to go out of their way to please someone else (non-sexual way.) I've never had the reputation of a slut or anything; but now it's getting ridiculous I get calls (they come up as private) at two in the morning saying to go f*ck myself. I am almost 100% sure these guys are from my grade because it sure does sound like them, but they never even had a class with me or have gotten to know me, and my other guy friends would never do this to me, I know them too well (and they don't go to my school) . And our whole grade is 30 kids. I asked last year to my parents if I could switch schools, but they said no they want me to go to a private school until I graduate. I would go to a private catholic school but the problem is that I am not catholic and the schools I checked into say that one of your parents has to regularly attend church. There is one other private non-denimental (sp) school, but it's too costly for my parents. I would be considering boarding school but that's also too costly and I'm sure it's too late to register, and, my school's guidence counselor told me I should switch, but my parents don't want me to go to public school because my brother didn't do so well and I don't want to go to public school either. But I don't know what to do at this point because for the past two years I've attended this school I've been picked on and sexually harrased. I never told anyone that I've been sexually harrased but I want to tell my mom, but I don't know how, and everyone there is just really mean, I've tried making friends in different grades, but it's harder and the friends I have made are leaving. I am slowly collapsing into a depression right now and my therapist said that she's suprised I haven't rebelled yet. But I want to tell my mom first that I've been sexually harrased and my therapist second.

So what should I do? How should I tell my mom that I've been sexually harrased? Thank You so much and I'm sorry for length

Write your mom a note. Or let her read this.
Whats wrong with public? Just because your brother didnt do well dont mean you will not do well. You two are two different people. You should give it a try, and if you dont like it switch back to private. Its free. So it would save your parents a ton of money. And you will get to know different types of people not just the types that can afford private schools. Who would want to be thrown into a world where they didnt have a great range of different cultures??
Or didnt know alot about different types of people??

Q: My mom and the rest of my family are going on vacation tomorrow morning..And my 16th birthday is Wednesday! Yay! I mean I'm not upset, they all need it and I just got back from Europe and I am back in school anyways..So what should I do for my birthday since nobody will even be here. Like with my friends and such? I don't want to mope around. Just ideas. Thanks much :]

You should ask your parents if its ok to have a little get together for your birthday. Tell them it wont be a party it would just be a couple of friends at the house to celebrate with you. Make sure you tell them it wont be to late becaue it's a school night. Im pretty sure they will be fine wih that. And have some finger foods. Like sandwiches. You know something cheap. Chips and sip. Maybe some hot dogs. And a little music. Or you can get together and watch a movie.

If they turn you down, do it at another friends house.

If all fails, you can always not tell them. lol

Q: 1. If a customer orders, but then demands a refund while the food is almost finished cooking, because they thought it was too expensive, is the money returned?
2. If a customer eats the food they ordered, then say they did not like it, is the money returned?

Thanks. My parents have a restaurant, so I was curious.

What kind of a restaurant is it? normally you dont pay until after they eat.
Normally the money does get returned or they can trade it out. But if they eat it all then no. Because obviously it wasnt that nasty.

Q: what are some songs by snoop dog?

also, what is his personality like? is he nice or kinda mean and rude?

also is kiss's tongue real or did he add like an extension to it?

thx!

Snoop dogg is Nice. But he is mean when he has to be. He is a retired ganster. An OG as many would say. songs by him:

Gin And Juice
Drop It Like Its Hot
Candy
Thats That
Boss's life
I wanna love you
Beautiful
What's My Name

AND a list of all his albums.....

1993: Doggystyle
1996: Tha Doggfather
1998: Da Game Is to Be Sold Not to Be Told
1999: No Limit Top Dogg
2000: Tha Last Meal
2002: Paid tha Cost to Be da Bo$$
2004: R&G (Rhythm & Gangsta): The Masterpiece
2006: Tha Blue Carpet Treatment
2007/08: Ego Trippin'

Q: Ok There's thsi girl that's a size double zero. She's like a doll!

My friend is a size zero and i'm a size 1.

3 of us weigh 105 pounds.

How can that be? O_o

Well because you all are built different. Your weight may be distributed in different places.
You being in a one, may have more hips. I think your getting the picture. You may also have different brands of jeans. Certain people's jeans may be made big or small. Which just mean they are measured differently.

Just becuase you weigh the same doesnt mean you are going to wear the same size.

Q: I am takin this trip in a few weeks to go visit a friend and I have not been able to figure out how long its going to take me to drive there. The distance from starting locaton to ending location is approximately 1000 miles. If I were to travel at a minimum of 65 miles per hour for the most part, about how long would it take to get there?

About 15 hours. Wow sorry. Thats alot.
Wanna know how I got that??

If you are going to drive at a speed of 65 miles per hour of course that means you are actaully going to tracel 65 miles an hour. SO you divide 1000 by 65. And it gives you 15.38.
Which means 15 hours!! YAY!! try driving a little faster maybe??

Q: Im goin into 5th grade and im scared and i dont know who and what class im goin to be in what should i do??

Same classes as last year just harder and different teachers. Just brace yourself and dont expect the worst.

Q: I was wondering if it was required to take the SAT for most schools if you are staying in state? Some schools I'm wondering about are Northwestern (in IL), and University of Chicago. TIA=).

Some colleges will make you take this placement test its like a sub sat. But i think its bst to take the sat though.

Q: i was wonder what it was made of
im pretty sure sprite fruint punch
and some kind of LQ if some one knows
id helppppp thanks ------ xOo

Everclear. Fruit punch. hawaiian punch is the best. With fruit in it. Like sliced oranges.

BUT i dont in anyway support underage drinking so if you are underage Im just letting you know!!!

Q: Does anyone know of some cool websites that you can play with other people online? Some cool ones not some boring ones! Thanks in advance!

It is this website called king.com that you can play against other people for jewels.
Oh and msn. You are actually playing against people too. I think its the better of the two.

Q: like in the movie Bring It On, there was this thing called a spirit stick. and no i dont mean the deoderant, i mean like.. it was this stick that i guess was really important to the cheerleaders? whats so great about it? and what is it made out of? and how do they get it and stuff? im not a cheerleader so i dunno.

When cheerleaders go to a competition or a camp, Who ever does the best is given a spirit stick. Its just a stick that is a symbol that a squad has the most spirit. That they are the most enthusiastic about what they do. and they are the best at it. Its probably made out of a hard stick. I've seen but never touched.

Q: well... i was at my bestfriends house spending the night and her bother was there so like we was chillin me and my b/f and her brother had called his friend to come over so then lyk 10-20 min later sumone was knockin on da door n lyk my b/fz brother answered it and me n my bestfriend was layin down on da couch and wateva so like 2 people came in n the first one walked in and i looked at the 2nd one lets call him (style)so then they went to my b/fz room and i looked at my friend and she was lyk they was cuute.. so then they came out of the room and went to the balcony to smoke... so lyk i guess ten min later this boy lets call him smiles so smiles came in with a big smile on n laughin n me and my best friend lets call her ct me and ct was on the cpu looking for songs i guess to sing or something so like i had ctz brothers phone n smiles came in and was like thats your phone i was like no he was like oohhh das my ni99az phone right i was lyk yea (he was talking about ctz brother)(i wasnt paying attention to him that much because i had just got in a fight with my boyfriend so like i was going to give up on dudes for awhile) soo then ctz brother and style came in from outside and they was in the livingroom so everyones in the livingroom so then ct asks me if i want my hair dun so like i said yea so then lyk she tol me to sit on da floor n wateva...shes about to part my hair n lyk wateva so then smiles is sitting down right next to her i guess hes looking at my hair and ct is like you wanna touch her hair touch it touch it touch it it aint gonna bite ya nd he touches my hair n i feel it so then he started askin me questions 1st question he was like you brazilian me and ct laughed because i had a puerto rican bandanna on so then i was like no im puerto rican nd he asked me sumore questions and then he was like what grade you in and style said she in da 6th grade nd i said no im not it was just alot of answers nd i said im a freshman he was u go to drama high? i was like yea (thats not the name of the school) he was like i never seen you there i said i aint never see him there either so then we was talkin n wateva nd i was lookin at the tv nd he was like whos phone is this i looked back sooo fast nd i saw it was my phone i was like gimme my phone n i kept sayin it n he wasnt givin it to me so then he gave it to me so then i kept lookin at da tv or style one of them and then smiles was tappin me so i look back and he smiles so then idk what i do so then they bout to leave and wateva so then he was like bye to me first and then he was like bye to ct but he had called her a different name so she had got mad n told him to get out her house it was funny because he was looking straight at me and smileing so then he closed the door and me and ct started laughing she was like he was tryna get at me n blah blah blah and style was lookin at me to n all dat type stuff n i wanted them to come back sooo bad so then they came back like an hour later or somthing and they was knockin n me n ct was layin down on da couch so den dey knocked again n she was bout to get up but i got up before her n answered the door i opened the door and went behind it n smiles walked in first lookin arround n he looked beside the door and he smiled at me nd da rest of them came in so they went to ctz brothers room and then they came out lyk 5 min later or wateva nd smiles and style was bout to leave and smiles was like goodnite n smiled n was lookin at me so i said it back....lol theres more the fact that i saw him at lunch lyk 3 dayz later n i got all happy and junk nd the fact he went to jail and i waited and waited for him to get out and then the fact that i message him on myspace and he dosent reply back and the fact that my friends sayin im in love with him which i dont think its true but what im wondering what do yall think about this situation i mean does he like me or was he just high? SHOULD i move on? or should i just keep it like it is? should i listen to my friends when they say that we should go out that im in love with him and all these things??

Well this is very confusing but I will try to figure this out. Umm he probably does like you. But if your friend likes him move on. What is better, Having a best friend, or a boy? Boys come and go. You have known her way longer. AND how you gonna be in love with someone you dont know?? Its puppy love.

Q: I'm 15/f and I pretty much have the flexibility of a 50 year old [no offense] haha. I mean, I can touch my toes with my legs straight but that's about it.

I've been really interested in improving my flexibility and somewhat towards contortion for about two years now, and I have done absolutely nothing to work on it [School kept me up until 2AM. I didn't really have time but to eat, sleep, and go to sleep] Anyways, I was thinking of working on the two for the rest of summer, which isn't much left, but I'll continue to work on it as much as I can even when school starts.

Anyways, I was looking to self-train myself. I know that I should never push myself or I'll get hurt and etc, etc. My mom won't let me learn to be one because of money issues and also because she'll think I'll tear everything in my body. But I was wondering if it was possible for me to start at age 15 & self train myself to do splits, bridge, straddle, etc. And also, does anyone know a great site that helps with self-training beginner contortionists? I've already found learningcontortion.com

...dont knw any sites but, How bout stretching everyday until you can stretch that particular part how you want to. Like sit on the floor with you legs out and stretch them out as far as you can in the oppisite direction until you feel a litttle pain. Try to stretch them everyday a little more until you get them how you want them. Thats how I started doing the splits.

P.S. I stretched Like everyday!! And It took me about a month in a half with a little pain and 2 with none!!

Q: ok so i recently added some layout sites to my myspace and i can see their bulleteins on the board thing but when i go to click the links it takes me back home. sothen i click their names on the bulletein board and it sayd i need to add them
so when i do it says that theyre already my friends.

like i know tom sent something about this earlier but i thought he fixed it and its still happening to me

anything i can do?

Their is really nothin you can do. Myspace is a work-in-progress. Which means it is always gettin worked on. Just cuz its fixed for some people doesnt mean its fixed for you. Give it a couple of days, and if it still messes it, send tom a message.

Q: what is the sexiest thing a girl can wear without looking REALLY slutty?

Im not a guy but a girl can tell you this.
Somethin that is fitting to you but not too tight and doesnt show off all your goodies. Maybe a short or lowcut shirt. Not both. And some semi tight jeans. OR some short shorts. Not ass shorts. But just short enough to leave something to the imagination.

Q: hey everyone ! :)
i'm hailey and im almost 16 years old.
one of my guy friend's older brother is 16 and totally cute! i like everything about him, hes in a band, hes nice, hes funny. everything. so my friend is always saying how how his brother thinks i am. i got a little discouraged because i only see him when i hang out at my friends house. but; today he asked me to come into the other room so he could play me a private preformance. i was thrilled and he played me a few new songs he wrote, then we hooked up. then i went back and hung out with my friend. i dont know if there will ever be anything more. any advise?

He probably likes you. So what you do is, the next time you and him hang out together, see how he acts towards you. If he act like he doesnt really want to be bothered then it was most likely just a hook up. BUT if he act like he does want to be bothered thats a good sign.

You should also just ask him and get it out the way. It would be better than just wondering.

Q: ok my problem is that i want to know what are the signs of pregnancy, i know one, and thats about not having ur period. but is there anymore?

The first couple pf months that you are pregnant, your face may break out, but then it will clear up. Your breast will start to get bigger. You may be nausea. You may feel more tired. If you aren't a hypochondriac, if you feel like your pregnant you most likely are.

Q: alright. im 17 and my boyfriend is turning 20. just for back ground details.
for his birthday i want to make him dinner. i just dont know what to cook for him. im not a pro chef or anything but i guess im not that bad. he likes italian food a lot...soo any ideas?

and then any ideas just for like setting up the dinner its self? i was kinda thinking of setting up a table outside on my deck because it will be a nice summer night and i live on a lake with a good view of the sunset.

You can look up italian recipes on the internet. Im thinking any kind of pasta would be great, and a steak maybe to go along with it. Steak is simple and you can always know when its done.

With the table you should make it so both of you can see the sunset. Have it set up nice. Plates, napkins, You know so it e=will look a little fancy. And to top it all off, you should burn a cd with his favortie slow songs on it and play it low in the backround.

Q: okay so recently, everytime I went to the washroom, my vagina would BURN SOOO MUCH. I masterbated with a tampon cap and the top of the tampon had like hard blastic and made like

\/
/\

You are just going to have to wait it out. Take a warm bath. not a shower so the water can flow in there. AND never do that again.

Q: every girl on advicenators that has ever had sex before i was just wondering...at the time that you had sex had you shaved all of your pubic hair off or did you just trim it?

Well when I did it, it was never planned. So Sometimes it wasnt shaved at all, Sometimes it was trimmed and sometimes it was completely gone. But I get lazy and I just take a pair of manicuring scissors, andtrim it really low.

bio

Its A brand new year!! And I havent really been giving advice lately so now IM BACK!! If you have something to ask dont hesitate to ask. DONT BE SHY!! I've been there! Or I know someone who has!

I am a black albino female whose been through alot!!! I have a lot advice to give. Im a very knowledgeable person, and i look at things from many different views. Im very blunt, so if you dont want to hear it straight dont ask me!! any thing else you wanna know get at me!

LET ME REINTRODUCE MYSELF REAL FAST, REAL QUICK!
iM A BLUNT PERSON, IF YOU ASK A GROWN UP QUESTION, IMA GIVE A GROWN UP ANSWER. RECENTLY A GIRL ASKED HOW TO GIVE A BLOWJOB AND I WAS VERY BLUNT AND UPFRONT WITH HER. I GOT SHUNNED FOR MY ACTIONS SO, BASICALLY. IM GOING TO TRY TO AVOID ANSWERING QUESTIONS LIKE THIS. BECAUSE ALL THOUGH THESE KIDS ASKING THESE QUESTIONS ARE YOUNG, THEY OBVIOUSLY BEEN DOING SOMETHING THEY AINT GOT NO BUSINESS DOING BECAUSE THE WOULDNT BE ASKING THOSE TYPES OF QUESTIONS.