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I don't know why, but everywhere I go, Oompa Loompas follow me. They laugh and call me George. I've been thinking of flying away on my spaceship i.e. banana peel and going to live on the planet of cheese-in-a-can, but I'm not sure if they have cable there. Do you have any idea if the planet has cable, or if there is any way to avoid the Oompa Loompas? Please help, they already took my sanity! 'Twas all pink and sparkly! (link)
Meat cleaver + Oompa Loompas = fun + no more Oompa Loompas


If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast to a cat and drop it? My first friend said that the cat would eat the toast. My 2nd friend wanted to know what kind of toast: rye, or sourdough, and when I said it was regular white bread, she bit me. I said that the cat and toast would be sucked into a rift in the space-time continuum and the world would end. Who is right? (link)
The cat would scratch you to pieces for even trying to attatch toast to it.




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