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How to deal with an ex

Question Posted Thursday June 28 2012, 3:17 pm

20/f - I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years about a year and a half ago, and since then, things between us have been really convoluted and messy. For the first few months, he wanted to get back together with me, but when I finally decided to consider it, he said he'd changed his mind. We decided to be friends, but since we go to schools in different states, we never talked much anyway. I had finally moved on and stopped thinking about all of this when he contacted me again, making things really confusing. Since we'd agreed to be friends, he never told me directly that he still had feelings for me, but the things that he said implied it because they weren't things that a person would normally say to a friend. He kept asking to see me and hang out with me when I returned from school, but since I've been back, he hasn't talked to me at all. I know that many people say that exes can't be friends, but I thought that I'd give it a shot anyway because we had been really good friends before we got together. The truth is that I don't know if I still have feelings for him, and I was going to determine it by seeing him again, but since he seems so indecisive about how he feels about me, I don't know what to do. I guess that I seem really indecisive as well, but it just feels like every time I make some progress in leaving this behind, he comes back into my life and I become unsure of things again.

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carayotie answered Thursday June 28 2012, 3:59 pm:
Hey there!
It really sucks when you break up with someone after being with them for such a long time, so obviously it'll take time to move on. Sounds to me like he doesn't know how to move on, and being indecisive just shows that he's probably just lonely. Just like girls, it's easy to fall back to the ex when your feeling lonely right? Dont let his back and forth pull you in. I'm sure there was a reason for the break up and if it would be this confusing to get back together then that would probably just lead into continuing a confusing relationship. If he really wants to be with you, he'll make the effort to see you and communicate :) I know it's hard since he was part of your life for a long time, but everything happens for a reason. If its meant to be you two will end up back together and things won't be confusing or complicated, it'll just feel right.

Take care!

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