After about 4 years of SI, im finding myself actually enjoying pain. Is this masochism? i mean i dont enjoy stomach aches. i enjoy when i cause pain on purpose. it used to be a whole coping thing, but recently its been about just the physical pain. i enjoy it, its hard to explain. i find myself thinking of new ways to cause pain and imagine how good it will feel. yes, i said good. has anybody else ever experienced this? if so, please tell me about your experiences. if not, any general advice or opinions are appreciated.
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