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Need closure from ex-bf
Hey Jack, you have answered a ton of my questions (by the way you're amazing!) And you give good advice so here I go again.
Well my ex-bf is the boy that posted the question about flirting at the pool (the lifeguard) today. Scratch that, I THINK it's him. It could be his brother. But it's so grammatically correct that I believe it's him (his brother can never spell...) You've answered so many of my questions in the past few days that I'm not even going to count, including one today (it started with the number 16.)
Summary: we went out for a year and a half. Broke up a few weeks ago. We really did love eachother. Now he wants nothing to do with me. Anyway your advice was to stay away from him at all costs, ex. delete him from my phone and stuff. But I'm telling you, I just can't do that! That would be so impossible and I don't have the willpower! I was wondering if you had any smart things that I can tell myself when he signs on AIM or when I get the urge to call him. Things that will make me stay away from him.
Also, since you're a guy I thought you could answer this: Why would he want to go from very best friends and bf/gf to nothing at all after the break up? Maybe it's a guy thing... I really don't get it. Do guys move on easier? Or does that mean that our relationship wasn't as good as I thought it was? (the break up surprised me.)
Last thing I promise: WILL he ever come around, you think? Will he suddenly IM me someday and want to talk? And since you're a guy, do you have any idea of how long you would wait to IM your ex if you were in my situation?
Thank you so much Jack you're amazing!
I saw you live in the Midwest, I do too! It's been awful hot lately : /
Thank you so much!!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hmm well if the things I said before about getting over him didn't help, I don't know that I have much of anything else to add.
Maybe when he logs on to AIM, sign off or go on a website like addictinggames.com or something. Maybe take him off of your buddy list so you won't know when he's on.
On to the other questions..
I guess it is a guy thing because I was never in a rush to be friends with my exes very soon. It was just too awkward and forced, I thought. Guys I think at least let on that they move on quicker, but sometimes they don't. If he was the one that broke up with you, which I'm assuming it was him, I'm sure he's going to have moved on faster.
I can't guarantee that he will come back and talk to you again, but eventually I started talking to my most recent ex, and we actually talked everything out maturely and came to an understanding. With my other ex it was just recently that I talked to her for the first time, and that was about a year and a half after we broke up. It really depends. You might never talk to him again or you could. Really it's all what he's comfortable with.
Like I said in my previous answer, don't IM him- have him IM you.
Yeah it was 92 where I live today! And it's going to be hot and muggy all week! =/
--Jack
(16/m)
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