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When to ask about past relationships
I'm a 16-year old, junior girl, and I'm dating this 18-year old, senior guy who I recently met. We first went out about two weeks ago, and we've been on 4 (I think) dates altogether. We are "officially dating", and so far we've made out with some upper-body fondling and a bit of dry-humping. I've had some sexual experiences, but I'm still officially a virgin. He seems to know what he's doing, but it seems like it's usually a "taboo" to ask someone if they're a virgin, or how many people they've slept with. I know that he wants to take it further into lower-body fondling, and that's fine with me, but I think that gives me the right to know if there are any potential things I should be concerned about, like STDs and such.
Basic question: How long should I wait before asking him, and how should I ask him if and how many girls he has slept with before?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You might want to initiate this conversation when you feel you're ready to engage in more serious sexual activities with him. The moment when that will happen entirely depends on you - the only rule is that if you don't feel comfortable talking about sex with your boyfriend, then you're not ready to have sex with him and you should wait until you know him better. Don't ask him how many girls he has slept with, as he may be embarrassed if it "wasn't enough" by other boys' standards (ego thing). A convenient way to start this conversation is to tell him that you like him and that you would like to try more things with him. Do it in a quiet place, sit next to him and maintain physical contact. If his reaction is positive, just tell him that you'd be more relaxed if you were sure that there is no risk of STDs, or whatever worries you, that it's the reason why you would like to know if he has had previous sexual experiences and if he has, has he been tested for STDs.
You should let him know that you are a virgin (in case he feels that it's a taboo to ask that too), because it's important for him to know that before you take your relationship further.
Happy communication!
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