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What are his intentions?


Question Posted Saturday September 23 2006, 4:35 pm

15/f

I have not dated a guy for almost two years now (a couple of days short of it), I think this is mostly because I have only ever kissed one guy. I feel that I should of gone at least a little further than that by now, but I do not want to start now.

I like this one guy and have for almost three years. We told eachother how we felt (its mutual) but sometimes he is shy around me now (or so I thought).

Last night, however, we were out drinkin and I really wanted him to kiss me but he didn't. We held hands and were together for like 6 hours straight, but around midnight we were sitting with a bunch of people and he had his hand rubbing my stomach (under my shirt, because it was cold) and I was fine with that. But then he started to go down just under the top of my pants, which I didn't think too much of. Finally he tried to go further but I moved in a position so he couldn't do it. We were sitting with a bunch of people so that was my only choice of what to do.

How is it that he can't kiss me but he can try to get his hand down my pants?

I know him REALLY well and he is a sweet guy.. and a virgin. What are his intentions? I am not ready to go further than making out with him right now (we aren't dating, that might change after a while if we were).

Is it worth telling him how I feel? What could I tell him? Is there a strong chance that he will not try to go further since he is quite shy around me most of the time?

I know this could be difficult to answer so I will rate good answers, appropriately of course.

Thanks so much for any advice relating to this :)


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Damian answered Sunday September 24 2006, 1:10 am:
He likes you, but considering the situation, the circumstances would have made kissing you a bit awkward for him. Rubbing your stomach would be a bit more subtle and wouldn't recieve too much of a reaction out of the group you were with. However, going for a first kiss in front of a big group is usually not ideal for a guy. Aside from that, I totally agree with you that the reaching "down-under" is totally inappropriate, especially in public. There really is no explanation except for the fact that he might be curious to push the boundaries. He likes you and he wants to see what you are open to. If he was thinking at all, chances are that he won't do it again.

There is one thing that I don't particularly understand. You've told each other that you've liked each other, yet you aren't in a relationship? You like each other! START GOING OUT! Start dating, and get to know him much better. No matter what you do, NEVER tell a guy how far you are willing to go. For some reason, it totally destroys a relationship. Just take it slow and progress according to how you feel. Kissing and holding hands would be a start. But as you move deeper into a relationship, you should know in your own mind when to stop escalating. You seem to know whats going on. If you like him, make it official, then see where the relationship goes. I'm sure you'll do great.

-Kuo

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