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choosing
15/f ;; whats the best way to choose between 2 guys? the 1st guy i met a couple months ago and we connected pretty quickly and we get along really well blah blah blah. the 2nd guy, i just met earlier this week, but we get along really great and he's more my "type". they both like me.. and i really dont wanna have to decide because i think i might like the 2nd guy more, but i kinda feel like thats unfair to the 1st guy since weve been "talking" longer, and i knew he liked me so maybe that was bad to do to him to even start talkin to the 2nd guy..? its gonna break my heart to have to hurt either one of them.. im so confuesd i really dont even kno where to begin on what to do.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
well, first off, did either of them ask you out yet? or have you asked either of them out?
all right, as is my custom on advicenators, i shall now assign pseudonyms to each of the guys. 1st boy: ensio. 2nd boy: kato.
you've got to first try looking at this in an objective manner (meaning practically, realistically, not influenced by emotion). are either ensio or kato rebellious juvenile delinquents? drug dealers? disrespectful (to anyone and/or everyone, not just women)? lazy? dishonest? sneaky? do they have a history of bad relationships in the past? a bad family life? a police record? detention-acquiring tendencies? another girlfriend?? >.>
i'm not saying that any of those apply to either of them, necessarily. you just need to evaluate in a cautious manner whether or not either of these guys are going to bring too much trouble with them, and whether or not you can/want to handle that. because, yeah, a lot of guys can have troubled family lives, but that doesn't necessarily mean you can't date them; you might even be good for them, as support and a caring person in their life.
second, you should objectively analyse which seems to be the better match for you. it's true opposites attract, but people who are very similar can attract too. ^_^ if you're usually the dominant one in a relationship (or the submissive one), which one can best complement that? who do you feel like you can be the most open with? which one of them is the most supportive and there for you when you need it? who does it seem like you are able to talk to a lot, or a little, and not worry or mind a few pauses and silent moments?
as far as breaking ensio's (1st boy's) heart, yeah, maybe he liked/likes you, but has he told you that? and i mean specifically, out loud, like (and now for convenience and entertainment purposes, i'll call you) "choosy. i like you. in a like-like romantic kind of way." ^_^ and just because you two have been talking and have been friends longer doesn't mean you've been leading him on or hinting that you want a bf/gf relationship. then again, maybe you have been, i don't know the whole situation.
my advice is to think about these above things, as well as consider what things would be like if you dated ensio or kato, and what you might lose from the relationships you already have with both of these guys if you dated one of them. wait a while and ponder, and get to know kato (2nd boy) a little better. after you've done that, think about these things again. if you haven't decided by then, feel free to email me again and i'll be glad to talk things over with you.
keep both of the guys' feelings in mind, as well as what's in your own heart, and you'll be just fine.
hope this helped. good luck!
~*kitty*~
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