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I'm a good person with a big heart. All through my life I've been talked to
I'm a good person with a big heart, a free spirit and I'm beautiful but never thought so in the past.. I've had an inferiority complex most of my life. I'm very independent, a trend setter and never acted my age. All throughout my life I've been spoken to and/or treated mean and I'm a sensitive, cry at the drop of a pin girl. Why do people do that?
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Trauma. If people have continually treated you in the manner that you mention and you internalize it and place blame on yourself rather than others for it that will eat at you until you counter it by knowing who you are inside. You can't define yourself by what others may say.
They're projecting who they are on to you. What they have done says way more about where they are at and what they're about than you. You don't have to take crap from anyone and need to start pushing back.
I think that you cry as a release and only ability to get this stuff out. That's natural but doing it all the time at the drop of a hat isn't. I think you would benefit from talking to a professional who can help you learn ways to deal with this and move forward.
You need to see yourself as you really are and not from looking through a dirty window. Picture your student ID card or a driver's license. If the picture gets a smudge on it or gets something like mud on it and covered does that picture of the real you not exist anymore?
You're letting the real you take a backseat to all this muck that has been thrown on you. Just like the driver's license it can't hurt you if you know what the real you is all about and looks like. You are beautiful and always have been, your big heart, free spirit, independence, trend setting etc etc. is who you really are. Realize that and nothing can stop you.
The other thing you have going for you is that you are an intellectual and well, most teens aren't. You're very smart and that's why you identify more with people who are older. You should do fine in college.
I think what you really need is a professional who can help you work through all of this and deal with the inferiority you constantly feel and give you the tools you need to combat that and have a thicker skin in the end that nobody can say or do anything to tear you down. If you have that outlet and the ability to purge this stuff from your thinking you'll be fine.
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I must be odd because your question, I saw as possibly applying to two things and I really don't know which. Why do people do that is right after 1. Crying at the drop of a pin 2. All throughout my life I've been spoken to and/or treated mean and both in the same sentence. So now I must answer both just in case. Actually there isn't a good reason why, it just is that way, people who are sensitive I mean. My younger sister and my middle child are both that way. My personal opinion since I have seen it in family and also see myself becoming more sensitive is that those who cry easily tend to be more mature souls and so their heart cares more about peace, love, equality, caring for all living things. The good news is a person can become more sensitive. My grandma used to fly in from another country to spend the summer visiting. Everytime she had to fly home, my whole family, parents included, would cry and cry and I wasn't sad. I knew she'd be back next summer so I didn't see the need to cry. Now I will cry over things that weren't even done to me or experienced by me like the news of the attack on the Capitol this year, had me crying. When I find myself crying, I know it is something I need to pray about. YOu might try that. you can't change others but you can change your response. I am not saying to try to stop crying, just use that as an indicator that there is something to pray about.
I used to have social anxiety as a child and young teen. So I know what its like to have someone treat me mean, or say mean things. I also know that in being so quiet and different, kids didn't know what to do about it and tended to either ignore me or pick on me. I did have a handful of friends but they were true friends so I didnt need more.
Regarding why others can treat someone unkindly, it is a learned thing actually. There is a famous u tube video of two little boys who wanted to dress the same for twin day because they thought they looked like twins when one is white and one is black. They were best friends. I was in middle school when there was forced desegregation, meaning black kids were forced to attend a dominantly white school that was not in their neighborhood. Their parents were mad as I would be if my kids were in a school far away. They should have be allowed to go closer to home. As a result, the kids watched how angry their parents were and many of us became targets of those angry bused children. My parents had friends from every country and I grew up with more international 'aunts and uncles' as we were told to call them for politeness, than most kids ever had in blood aunts and uncles. I met black people and knew of a mixed race couple my parents were friends with. As a result, I grew up loving all people and was able to pass that on to my kids. If a person learns the wrong way on something by copying their parents, then it is on them to correct that when they are old enough to understand. Some people have that age of reasoning already as a pre teen while others may not get it until closer to their 30s. And another contributor to bad decisions is that everyone has the issue of the frontal lobe of brain not being mature and done until mid twenties. Before then, people tend to make bad decisions including how to treat others. Many do grow up some and change during their later twenties and others are lazy and have their bad behavior set by then and do not care to change or become a better person, and often do not believe there is anything wrong with them, like an ex of mine. I do remember a talk I had with my youngest when her Dad, (the bad ex) had acted like a child instead of an adult, humiliating her also and she was sobbing hard. I told her what I want you to hear too. I told her first that I was sorry that her Dad had acted that way, that sometimes we are going to come up against unreasonable mean people in our adult lives. Having one who is part of the family or close in other ways, means you have the opportunity to learn to not let their mean-ness bother you, you get the chances to become stronger and better in your own character. He refused counseling so I divorced him. Remember, everyone has a free will to do good or do bad. You can pray for them to see the light someday but other than that, choose wisely your friends and those close to you so they treat you only good. The others who treat you badly, are not worth your time or association with. But you still will get a nasty human in line behind you saying, "Hurry up idiot", "I don't want to hear what you have to say, shut up! Get out of my face!" Yes, words can hurt if you take them into yourself and keep mulling over the event. The best you can do is to be done at the moment it happens and it has to do with your thoughts. You immediately counter theirj unfair attack with the truth you know about yourself. Example: Someone laughs at me and says I'm ugly, or common today... You're a racist. Instead of focusing on their very wrong and meant to be hurtful words, I know they have not matured as a person no matter their age, they are not trying to improve themselves daily even a little bit and probably are that way because they had bad home life growing up. I discredit their words the moment they come out of their mouth. But discrediting and any thoughts must remain unspoken, you are doing this for you, not for them. All you can do for them is pray that their angels or God, gets through their thick skull and are allowed to help them make better choices.
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