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Is it weird that I actually want to be grounded?
Hi. I'm a 16 y/o girl. I guess you could say I'm generally a pretty good kid. I've never been in any major trouble. So, I've never been grounded. Most of my friends, on the other hand, have been grounded at least once in their lives. I'm actually curious as to what it's like. Like, to the degree that I find myself daydreaming about what I could do to get myself grounded so I can finally find out. Am I weird for doing this? I'm sure my friends would think I'm psycho. What do you think?
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
Yes, I agree, it is indeed "weird" ! All you need to do, if you want to experience it, is to impose grounding on yourself. But...would you want to experience other rather unhappy things, such as...getting into an auto accident? , becoming injured or hospitalized? Having your friends abandon you? Or, any other number of unpleasant things, just to find out what it feels like?
What you could do, however, is get into acting! There, without actually harming yourself, you could indeed come very close to experiencing what all kinds of different situations might feel like. Check it out! ~Good wishes, Dr.Stephanie
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I think that everybody has pretty much said what there is to say about this...
I would just add one thing: Have a "code word" that your parents will know means that you want them to say NO to whatever you are asking.
If you always call them Mom & Dad, for example, have the code words be something like "ma" and "daddy"
You're on the phone or in the presence of a friend(s) who is asking you to do something that you don't want to do:
- Ma, can I go to the concert with Annie this Saturday?
Mom says NO and you look like you tried - YOU didn't say no, you parents aren't allowing it.
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Doing things just to get a reaction or piss people off especially your parents to find out what this would be like is a bad idea. The fact is they did something that genuinely earned them the right to be grounded and you haven't come close to that in real life.
I would be proud of being that kind of person that your parents trust and doesn't look for or find themselves in trouble. Each parent parents a child differently and deals with situations and trouble their child causes or disciplining them differently. Your parents know what works for them and for you if that makes any sense.
I think your best bet to find out how the other half lives is to ask your parents why your friends get grounded when they do something wrong and you don't. Explain that it's common with them and you don't know why or what that's like. It's an honest question and doesn't mean you're psycho either. Wanting to know about something that has never happened to you or perplexes you is a natural thing. If you want to know ask them.
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I had a Mom write in asking if we could figure out why her daughter was curious like you are here, but in this case curious how it felt to have lice. So she cuddled close with a girlfriend who had lice, so she could catch it. Curiosity is okay as far as I know as long as it is not curiosity that will cause lots of trouble for yourself, be dangerous or make life harder on others due to what you try out, simply cus of being curious. I will tell you what I told that Mom. I will share about something each human goes through as teen and young adult and it has to do with the frontal lobe of the brain. It affects crucial thinking and reasoning. So for example teenagers have a poor ability to measure their current actions against potential future consequences. I never got grounded but due to other things I have experienced in life, its not so hard to imagine what it would feel like and that I don't want to try to make it happen. So if you wonder why you'd
even think such a thing, heres the full article:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Imagine you're an adult now, working a job full timer M-F, and one day you wonder what it would fee like to play hookey and not go to work. So you don't call to warn the boss that you are not coming in. Even if ill, a company needs to know in case it is a job with different shifts and needing to pull someone off another shift to take your place. Who knows what hardships it can cause your employer. When you show up the next day, you get called into the managers office. They're figuring you were sick but failed to call in and so you are reminded you have to call in. Next time you don't, you get fired. Or you may already be told you're fired depending on anything else you may have done poorly or wrong on the job and this is the final straw, the manager won't tolerate more. So acting on such a curiosity here has caused either a bad mark in your employee file or loss of the job, and you have used up a sick day when you weren't sick so you have less sick days just in case they are needed, or now have none left and next time you're sick, it will not have sick pay attached.
If you are somewhat popular or have lots of friends, being grounded, means you can't go be with them, can't text them or do so on tablet or computer, no calls, because the grounding is to take something away from a teen that they really like and that would be getting to go hang out with friends or at least be able to communicate in some way. If you overuse your cell phone, losing use of that and having to stay home will feel like a kind of prison. You would also lose your parents trust in you so even after a grounding ends, they will still not trust you and be checking up too much on your where abouts all the time, embarrassing you or worse, calling one of your friends to check up on you if you don't answer. Or a parent may say that they don't trust you now because of whatever you did to get grounded so other privileges are taken away and you may not be able to go off on own, use the car, and only choice is getting to accompany a parent going out to run an errand. You tarnish your own reputation so you're no longer a pretty good kid. And when a teen with little else to your name, having a good reputation is like having gold. Let your only acting out on curiosity be something simple like what goat cheese tastes like if you've never had it. Every adult I know has some kind of foods they just don't like, after at least tasting. that kind of curiosity is normal. Does it mean yours is abnormal? The thought is not abnormal but acting upon it is . Hope this has helped.
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