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Should I tell my boyfriend this??
I think someone is in love with me, but isn't telling me because I have a boyfriend. I'm pretty sure the guy is interested in me though. Should I tell my boyfriend that this guy has feelings for me???
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Slow down. Write down the reasons first why you think this guy likes you, and make sure it’s reliable. Does he even like you in the first place or are you just interpreting him being nice or looking at you vaguely as him liking you?
If chances are he does, well there’s really no need to tell your boyfriend if he’s not making pushes on you to become his girl. A real man who truly fell for you would respect your relationship. If he’s not, then better tell your boyfriend.
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It's pretty easy to figure this one out. All you have to do is use your imagination and reverse roles.
So lets say it's your boyfriend who thinks that another girl is in love with him but not telling him because he has you for a girlfriend. He writes and asks if he should tell you.
If the scenerio was reversed like that, would you really like your boyfriend to walk up to you and say, "Hey I have something interesting to tell you. I think that there is a girl who might be in love with me, even though you are my girlfriend. I am guessing but pretty sure and figure she isn't saying anything to me because I am with you."
So how would you feel? Would you be saying, "Great! The more, the merrier!" I don't think so. You would be thinking, Why is the fact that someone else is into him so on his mind? Is he not happy with me? If he can't stop thinking about her, what does that say about our relationship? Is he possibly thinking that maybe if he tires of me, he's got an instant new girlfriend, or maybe he is thinking of leaving me, or maybe secretly dating her on the side. I guarantee if you are a normal female, you will be thinking something along those lines. Girls and boys alike tend to feel possessive of their gf/bf. So if you tell your boyfriend that another guy loves you, even though he's never said that,just by his looks and actions, then wouldn't your boyfriend feel the same as we just pretended if it was you being told this? If your boyfriend hears you tell him this, he may think you are planning on breaking up with him and going after the other guy. Do you really want to make a big thing out of the fact that someone else admires you and is attracted to you. Heck girl, this kind of thing happens to all people throughout their lives. And this is why there are so many fights due to jealous feelings. Jealousy is a fear of losing something. Your boyfriend may fear he is losing you to another guy. Probably 90% of people or higher can not handle hearing this kind of thing. So it is better left unsaid and you focusing on the boyfriend, not dreaming about the other guy. If you feel the bf is the wrong guy for you, then you will have to decide if you will break up with him but don't do this just to have a chance to see if something might work out with the other guy.
Hon, listen closely as I am older and have experienced much of this in my life. I am remarried to a wonderful guy. He and I both know we are soul mates and love each other so much. that doesn't mean that occasionally another woman isn't going to look at him or even flirt. And for me, it means guys are looking, smiling and flirting. Not everyone but occasionally. Still, just because someone else might be interested, or even think they love me, that doesn't affect what we have. I and my husband are the exception. He told me about a lady in check out as he was cashiering who was flirting and asking if he'd like to go grab a coffee sometime. He knows he can tell me because neither of us have any reason to feel jealous, we have no fear that there is someone better or different who will steal our mate away. What makes him a good husband is part of who he is and I can't expect him to turn it on for me and shut it off for other females. This list would include, Mom, his sister, his friends female relatives, and female neighbors. He is great at sensing when someone needs a kind word and will compliment lets say a cashier on her necklace. The only issue is if a guy does that for other females but has stopped doing it for you or rarely does it for you. So one day, he complimented the gal and I was in line right next to him. The terrified look she shot at me was clear, she was thinking, OMG, he did that in front of his woman and she is going to blow up at me or maybe me too. Actually, it was the opposite, I was hard put to not laugh out loud at the look on her face. I was biting the insides of my cheeks and covering my mouth with my hand to attempt to hide the fact I was finding it funny. I hardly think your boyfriend would start laughing if you told him. Neither would you if it was the other way around. Also, when it comes to being attracted to someone, that someone doesn't always feel the same way back. There is a lack of chemistry. So even if some guy thinks he likes you, and you were single and started spending time with him, there is no guarantee that you would feel chemistry. If you don't know what that is, heres the best way I know to explain, a kiss from a guy you have chemistry with is going to feel heavenly, make your heart so somersaults, etc. Whereas a kiss from a guy who you lack chemistry with, is going to feel like a dad or brother giving you a romantic kiss, so it feels gross and makes you shiver in disgust. So in your life, even once married, both you and your man will have people who subtly stare at you or are braver and talk and flirt even if they know you are married, or they come out and say they want you or are in love. Too bad. They are in the wrong place at the wrong time and didn't meet you or the husband first. If a partner can be stolen away simply because someone else seems to be in love with you or your boyfriend, then know this, it means that either you or he never really loved each other, or you did but are so different and never really had the chemistry so it is easy to leave and go with someone else if not happy with your partner. Is that what you want, to leave your boyfriend and go try to date this other guy? Better think long and hard. You have the real thing now. There is no guarantee that this other guy you think loves you is actually in love. He may just be in lust with you. Men are visual creatures and so often if they have no female in their life as GF, wife, or are not happy in their relationship, or they are a player and will take any female to bed for sexual gratification for themselves, then when they see a female they feel lust for, just the want of sex, but without any love, they will look often and they will imagine what you must be like as a partner. Yes maybe it's more but you can't be in a relationship with two men at the same time or married to two men. Be happy with the right one, and don't go looking elsewhere. The only reason you are interested is because females do like knowing that other males find them attractive. Sure, I love it when other guys look at me, but it doesn't mean I wish I was married to them or dating them. Been there and dated many after my divorce but none of them were as great as the man I married. A pretty or handsome face could have a rotten personality.
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