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How do I train a headstrong housemaid?
Okay, I'm from Vietnam, and we have this housemaid, and it's impossible to fire her right now, but she can't seem to listen. She likes to do everything her own way, cleans only what the eye can see, does not listen when is told what to do, and is disgustingly lazy. She's about 50 y/o. Even when we say her salary will be cut down, she doesn't change at al! What must I do?
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You didn't say why it is you can't get rid of her. That may help with an answer. Usually, if someone hires a maid, just like any company hiring a new employee, there has to be good reason to fire an employee. Reasons such as being lazy, not getting all the work done, not following directions and doing this all consistently, are legal reasons for a company to fire a person. Firing without reason can be debated in court as unfair and bias due to age, skin color, sex, sexual orientation, etc...
I had a run in with a head strong person myself and I was the care giver. She was elderly and contacted the agency to get help around the house due to being so elderly and frail. Frail my ass! That woman was strong enough to come physically push me aside if she did not like how I was doing something she asked me to do. I never did household chores like I did at home but always asked for directions and did things exactly as the clients wanted. I couldn't figure it out for a while but eventually, it came to me when she'd ask me to do something and then proceeded to show me how but never stopped to give it over to me. The demonstration went on and on. She was lonely but more so, she simply wanted an audience to witness what she could still do for herself. I told the agency I wouldn't go back. I want to go where I could help, not to be someones audience.
The point I am getting to is that if I did something, it was not good enough for her because she was from another generation and her way of doing things was so engrained, she thought that she was teaching a person in their forties, how to do things the way she was taught, that it was an absolute only way and that there were no other ways to do it, in fact, she was likely trained to do everything for herself, rather than to ask for help. She knew she had asked for help so she merely went through the motions of pretending she needed help when she had no intention of allowing me to help. Your 50 yr old maid may also be on ingrained in what she learned from childhood on, that she won't feel that any other way is going to be better or faster. She might be perfect for someone who doesn't care her methods, or lack of cleaning or being too slow, someone very ill and unable to do any of their housework or even cook for themselves with chores so far behind it is ridiculously crazy. Any little bit of work she did to clean and organize her own way would be appreciated and one less thing the ill person would have to worry about. If you hired her from a company, call them to ask for a different maid, and tell them she's not working out for you. YOu don't have to bad mouth her, because anywhere else she goes, she'd be rejected by many customers and the agency will figure out she is a problem. If you hired her from an ad, not an agency, when you let her go, then next time, either go through an agency or get someone younger, but not too young either, someone you can talk to and ask how they clean, show them tasks around your house, not after hiring but in an interview before hiring. Ask her how she would tackle that chore. Get a feel for her on how well she can follow directions, and is her personality more like your own. Sometimes a position doesn't work if personalities differ too much. this is the best I can advise with what you did share.
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