One of my friends EX's told me and only me that she and my friend broke up. she sent me a text with a smiley face emoji.I also don't know who broke it off. So I don't know if she is hitting on me and if she is should I go for it or should I wait and see what her next move is. I also don't want it to be weird for me and my friend because we have to work together for the next 9 months on a committee.
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship? Dragonflymagic answered Tuesday August 25 2015, 8:32 pm: I don't know how you know that you're the only one who's been told unless this person made sure to tell you this piece of info. They sure didn't tell you anything else. I don't understand the trading gf/bf's around thing. It seems too many just sit and wait for a friend to discard a sweetheart like getting rid of old clothes and there's always another friend ready to pick up where the other left off. It doesnt matter if she's hitting on you or not. What matters is, do you even have an inkling of a clue what on earth you are looking for in a date, a sweetheart, a possible future long term or life long mate? If you don't know, takae the time to figure out first what it is you need and want and what it is you have to offer. Don't just go snapping up a person on a the rebound out of a relationship.
If this gal really liked you so much that you would think she is now hitting on you, then why didnt she date you in the first place instead of going with the other person? If I were in your shoes, the first thing I would have thought when this gal decided to text only me with this information would be to ask: "And exactly what is your reason for telling me about this breakup? I would think that is private information for my friend to decide whether to tell me or not." It really wasn't her call to share this news in the first place, being that she wasn't exactly your close friend in the first place, only the girlfriend of a friend of yours. Since this is after the fact of her text, you can still bring it up to ask questions but simply calling and saying, that you are still puzzled over why she would have thought that it was her job to tell you of the split up. And you would like to know why she did, and who broke up with whom." You may have to wait a while if your friend doesnt divulge this information to you before asking your friend, like waiting until its obvious your friend isn't hanging out with her anymore. Then get the other version of the story.
What IS important is to know the reason of the split up. If your friend has behavior or she has behavior that is detrimental to the health of a relationship, that would make sense. If however she's the one truly with issues, then you will have the same outcome in the end as your friend. If the two started dating only to find over time that they really aren't the best match, are not as attracted as they were in the beginning, have little in common, no real chemistry, then that is a valid reason for not staying together and breaking up and it would be okay to date her. It really all depends on the why of breakup and what you really are looking for in a date. 9 months in a long time to wait to be in the clear to pursue her though, so you may want to subtly do your own discovery work as to why she told only you, why the break up and see if you can gather any info from your friend. If your friend says they really werent a good match and it was a peaceful split up, then you might ask if interested in her still, what he would think if you were to pursue her. Thats all I can think of. Hope it helps.
If for some reason, you're really into her, then wait until the work committee thing is over. [ Dragonflymagic's advice column | Ask Dragonflymagic A Question ]
missundersmock answered Monday August 24 2015, 3:06 am: If you have to keep seeing him then no, i wouldnt pursue that until AFTER. Shit could turn awkward REAL fast and it WILL translate over into the work environment weather you or him is aware of it or not because emotions are emotions and they dont listen to anyone most of the time unless that person makes a concerted to NOT let it get in the way so i would just wait it out if you do want to see where it goes.
((id try to find out why they broke up just so you can get a better picture of who did what and why it didnt work out. if you can get BOTH sides of the story too that'd be great so then you can use your own judgement on the situation to let you see the bigger picture here. You dont know weather shes a cheating skank or hes a compulsive lier , or one of them was abusive behind closed doors))
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