Member Since: March 28, 2011
Answers: 1
Last Update: March 28, 2011
Visitors: 419
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so im 13 and i have gone through a lot of crap in my life, a lot. not really gonna go into detail, but basically what happeened in a nutshell is my life went upside down from being fun-loving girl to being confused, depressed and suicidal. thankfully i am not any of the last three discriptions anymore. I have lifted a weight off my chest and i feel very releived, but when i did lift the weight off my chest, it was the most pain i've felt in a long time. before that i was kinda numb or depressed you could say, but when this happened i exploded out of rage and anger. and i did cut. but i promised i would never do it again. how could i? it was basically the worst thing in my life that ever happened. things can only get better. i have been seeing a therapist. it is helping me.now is the time im trying to go back to being that fun-loving social butterfly i was before, even before i was depressed. so im determined to get my happy back with the help of going to therapy once a week, not cutting (which i only did 2x)and being optimistic, and improving myself by maybe who knows? becoming a nicer person, doing yoga and eating right? i think this is a great start for me to being myslef again. the weight i lifted off my chest recently happened about a month ago. and i feel the need to smoke, and drink, and do pot. Now i know it is not legal i am aware of that. and i know its not coming from a "normal" place, bc kids my age do not start that until maybe 16-18 yrs old. and i now realize that its coming from a place of hurt, since i said its the most pain i've felt in a long time. if i get over the hurt, since the weight has been lifted, and work on myself, will it pass? will the pain pass just like the drugs? i was also wandering if i were or did do drugs of some sort will it help ease the pain, on top of me working on myself? if u watch the movie Thirteen its almost identical what i went thru. so thank you sooo much xoxoxo im sry it was long. please give AS MUCH ADIVCE AS POSSIBLE THANK YOU. (link)
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Hello
I dealt with the exact same thing as you. I was the fun preppy cheerleading. I was friendly, had a big social life, even considered popular. I then started to get a bit depressed. I would sit in my room and listen to sad songs. I eventually started cutting. I was the girl nobody would ever have known. It eventually got worse and i started doing drugs. I would smoke weed in my room alone everynight and drink every weekend. I soon became so obsessed with drugs I tried committing suicide. I ended up in the hospital and was sent to a behaivoral health center. I just want to say that no matter how many drugs you take or cut it actually makes it worse. You soon get addicted so easily and cant really see a way out.. I have fully recovered and live a happy life. Its annoying when people say oh you are so perfect you should do modeling ect. but they have no idea. You are definitely not alone. You need to get your feelings out, maybe go see a psychologist. Quit all the negative thoughts. I started taking anti depressants. it really helps. Nobody has to know and It will help a great lot. I know you think nobody cares and your the only one in the world, but theres a lot of people suffering as well.. It will get better :)
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