Member Since: September 4, 2006
Answers: 2
Last Update: September 4, 2006
Visitors: 662
|
| |
i am 17 years old, female and i never had a boyfriend nor had a real first kiss. i feel like i can't get to know a guy because it feels like he thinks im not attractive . my question is, what do i need to do to get over my fear of talking to guys. i would really like to have a guys point of view and a girls.
(link)
|
What is it that make you feel unattractive?
Weight?
Handicap?
Physical appearance?
Guy are stuck on all of these, especially so at age 17. However, women are very poor judges of what they look like. The bottom line is guys at 17 are attracted to the unattainable. If you dont like the way you look, then do something about it. You are 17. Your prime will be 18-25. Take a year off of guys and dedicate yourself to a work out regimine. Don't do it for a week, do not quit. Join a gym, and forget about the social circle. When and if you go to college YOU will laugh at your silly high school crush's. It's best to go in great physical shape. Unfortunately, looks are always the first step to the first kiss. Unless of course the guy just wants to get laid which also is pretty popular in guys from 17, to well umm 65.
good luck.
|
hi...ive recently jus started goin out with this guy, and i realli love him.
the problem is .. he isnt the type of guy (looks wise) i wudda gone for .. the only reason im goin out with him is because of his personality and caring side...is this stupid?
(link)
|
Sorry, I am going to deviate from the norm here and say YES, this is stupid.
Are looks everything? No. Is it a problem for you? Yes.
When you find someone with that glimmering personality whom enlightens your day, they generally take on physical attractive attributes. I would call this attraction 'Sex Appeal'. This is different than your regular gorgeous looking specimen. A matter of fact looks usually have nothing to do with it.
I don't care if you love his personality and caring side at all, your need for him will fail in the coming months, when you look at him and feel nothing sexual towards him. If you truly find him sexually appealing, than I am way off base, but if you aren't there yet, you most likely will never get there. I will be the first to say that I myself have been that guy, and have landed plenty of girls, only to lose them down the road. The funny thing is that every girl I ever dated is still friends with me to date, and some say they wish they never left. My response to that is logic. You left because you plain came to the conclusion, that you just weren't attracted to me, that is why you still love me, but it's as a friend. I am guilty myself of going for looks over personality, but I have reasoning behind this. I already contain the elements of humor, talent, and the gift of gab. I do not want to date the same personality, I am actually attracted to the opposite, which is usually someone whom is hot! Most attractive people lack development in the area's I peak at. You can conclude that a blind person has better hearing, due to his/hers particular need to develop other skills, because
they can not see. Attractive individuals suffer the same consequence. If you are hot, where is the demand to develop a strong personality? i.e Paris Hilton, or sense of humor. Certainly this is not true in every case, but it appears to hold strong in 90 percent of the population. My advice to you, is to re-think your situation. Don't be selfish and lead this guy on, because it feels good to be treated well, and then 6 months down the road, dump him for some one whom later best suits your attraction. I know the first time this guy makes a mistake, you will use it as your 'out plan' 6 mos. down the road. The novelty will wear off and the basic human function 'Survival of the fittest' will kick in, leaving your boyfriend in the dust.
|
|