Member Since: September 6, 2006
Answers: 4
Last Update: September 12, 2006
Visitors: 1225
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My parents put a lot of pressure on me because they are almost 70 and my siblings are older, married, and well-established career-wise.
As the youngest, my life is in shambles. I'm pathetic. I was kicked out of my Ivy grad program after getting a C+ in a difficult class. I now don't know what do. My parents are strongly suggesting that I follow in the footsteps of my older sister who is a successful attorney. Everyday I speak to them, they (including my sister) suggest that I either go to law school, business school, or work for the U.N.
As a career, science is basically not an option anymore for me since I got a C+ in a very important class.
Anyway, I am stressed out and have clinical anxiety now. My career is in shambles. As a twenty-six year old, I feel like a failure, that I have disappointed my parents, and that my life is now without purpose or direction.
I have insomnia, I can't fall asleep at night, my hands shake when i am studying for the Business school, law school, and U.N. competitive exams (all of which I am studying for simultaneously since I promised my dad i would take the law exam, promised my mother I would take the business school exam, and promised my sister that I would take the U.N. exam--I guess each of them has a different agenda for me and all of them yell at me advice whenever I talk to them on the phone--they don't listen, they just yell at me), I am accustomed to weekly one-nighters, and I'm a frequent nailbiter and pen-chewer. I now have breakouts which i previously haven't had before, and i can't fall asleep at night, which is a contributor to my current skin problem.
I now have clinical anxiety, but I don't have the money for a therapist, and won't, since I'm currently unemployed and living in an expensive part of the country. I'm looking for jobs, but thusfar, have had no firm offers for non-temp positions.
Anyhow, i just wanted to see if anyone else here has academic anxiety and what they're doing about it. A lot of my friends themselves are going through problems of their own (i.e., relationship problems w/their bf's), and i don't want to burden them. Also, a lot of my friends living locally in the same city aren't as goal-oriented or academically driven as i am, so they can't relate to the same level as me when it comes to anxiety. I have made academics my life for the past four years. I have skipped parties, avoided dates, and basically made getting good grades my main priority. But now, I've been kicked out due to poor academic performance in a very important class.
I wasn't like this two years ago. Two years ago, i was a laid-back and happier person and more confident/secure with my academic abilities. Now, i find that i'm stressed out the majority of the time, can't relax when i go out with friends, and constantly in a state of anxiety about my career situation, which obviously is in a state of disaster. Coffee helps give me the energy to study, but it also makes me more nervous and keeps me awake and i can't relax or sleep after i come home from studying. I find that i have this restless nervous energy and i can't fall asleep. Anyone else strugggling with anxiety and just wondering if anyone else can provide me a constructive suggestion to solving my problem of anxiety other than self-medication?
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First off I have one word for you RELAX!!!!!. When I first started reading your question I thought you were 50 years old or something. How can you career be in shambles if you didn't even begin it yet. Have you ever sat down and tried to figure out what you want to do in life? We see what your family wants you to do, but what about what you want? I did not here you mention once that you were disappointed in yourself because this is what you've always wanted. Everything revoloves around my family said this or my family said that. Your family does not have to live your life, when you wake up in the morning your the one who has to look yourself in the mirror. Do you want to wake up at 40 and wonder what is the purpose in your life, because if you define yourself by what others think of you and what others want you to do then you lose any sense of self. One day you will look in that mirror and not even recognize yourself. Answer this one question: If you were told you had one day to live what would you do? If your answer is Study for an upcoming exam this afternoon, or listen to my family bash me for getting a C, then maybe your problems are bigger than you think. But if your answer is to enjoy your last day doing the things you love, then you need to remember that no day is promised. So enjoy life and stop calling yourself pathetic, because if you believe you are pathetic that is exactly what you will be. Tell your family what is going on they need to know that the pressure they put on you is causing you physical,emotional, and psychological damage. Find yourself, for the sake of your sanity, your future spouse, your future children and your future life, find yourself and make that person happy!
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okay i really need something because i sweat really bad on my underarms and its really embarrasing to wear sleeved shirts because theres big sweat stains. i have no idea why this happens. i mean im completly comfortable with myself. and and i dont get like overly heated but anyone know any like medicine or something taht will help me not sweat on my underarms any more?? i need answers. asap. thank you :D (link)
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There is this antipersperant called Certain-Dri. I also sweat very, very bad under my arms. SOmeone suggested that I try it and I did. It works really well, better than anything else I have tried, it is not a 100% cure but it cuts down on the wetness a whole lot. I bought mine at CVS, its a roll on in a white bottle.
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my gf broke up with me acouple days ago and i cant seem to get over it. we were going out for a really long while and i really loved her and she just did it all of a sudden. can someone give me some advice to get over her. (link)
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It has only been a couple of days, you are allowed to feel sad and hurt for awhile. Allow yourself to mourn a liitle bit because it is a loss. Just make sure while you are going through this process you realize that although it hurts right now it will not hurt forever. Remember, you can't hold onto something that does not want to be held, so let her go so you can love again.
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A really nice guy is hitting on me right now. He's very complimentary. The only thing that worries me is that he says he has Asperger's Syndrome. Does anyone know anything about this syndrome? Is it dangerous to be around/date people who have it? I don't have any type of mental problem. I want to go out with him but I'm a little scared of what he might do... (not sexually) He also says that he has a photographic memory and he cannot think in words. Is this going to be a problem in our relationship?
please give me advice. (link)
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I think it perfectly fine to date a guy with Aspergers. Aspergers is a kind of autism. Some people with aspergers can have little to no signs of the syndrome, and some with the syndrome you will notice are a little different. I work in the school system and have had experience with a few students living with this syndrome, in no way were these students dangerous. One of the biggest issues people with aspergers face are in social situations. Sometimes they may lack the social skills that a person without this syndrome would have. Yes people with aspergers may process thoughts differently, but they feel just the same as us. SO give him a chance and get to know him just like you would any other guy you meet. Judge him on his personality and the way he treats you, and the type of person he is, rather than judging him by a label that was given to him.
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