Member Since: January 17, 2018
Answers: 1
Last Update: January 17, 2018
Visitors: 146
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Okay this is a bit complicated! I have always told my wife that I am open to a threesome with another man if it would make her happy. When we first got together she mentioned the idea, sort of playfully, and I took it as a serious thought of hers. I let her know that if things were going to be completely open between us then I would consider such things. I guess I didn't think she was truly serious.
Anyway, the last discussion about this sort of sexual fantasy was a month ago and she said, "No! Absolutely not!" and that she is married and only wants to be with me. To be honest, I was quite relieved. I have no sexual desire for me and I would prefer my wife to only be with me.
Well, about 3 days ago, completely out of the blue, she tells me she found another guy she wants to engage in sex with. The catch is that she wants to have sex with this guy alone and without me present. She said she doesn't even want me to watch. Apparently, she used to know him but did not like him in any romantic or sexual way. I feel like she may be hiding some past secret desire to be with him, sexually, and is afraid I will "freak out" if she opens up and tells me the truth.
After two days of talking with me about this other man, she tells me she is just curious and that just kissing the guy and not even having sex with him would cure that curiosity. So, now she's taken it down a large notch and says that she no longer desires to have sex with this other man but wants to kiss him?
I have noticed her talking on the phone to "friends" more often these past few days. She ends the conversation when I come into the room. She has also come home two hours late from work yesterday, which is something that has never happened before. I feel like she is distancing herself from me.
What should I do? I am not really comfortable with this but I feel like the whole situation is my fault. I shouldn't have told her I would be open to other sexual things, I know, but I really wanted her to be happy and satisfied in our marriage. I don't know to "take that back" without seeming like a prick.
Yes, I want her to be happy. No, I don't want her to kiss, make-out, hook-up, or have sex with another man. I made a huge mistake. How do I fix this? If she kisses the other man, I'm going to feel crushed, but I want her to be happy and satisfied with me in this marriage. Please, help me! (link)
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It sounds like she has already had sex with the guy. Confront her.
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