Member Since: January 16, 2011
Answers: 7
Last Update: March 23, 2012
Visitors: 1103
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hi i am 13/f okay well here it goes...i get constant sexual urges, like for the last 3 years...i've never mastrubated before because i dont know how. i want to mastrubate so i dont end up doing something i'll regret, and my friend are like always talking about it and i feel so excluded, please help...i no i'm not ready to have sex but i'm getting desperate here
for good information i will rate 5's (link)
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"If anyone thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virginity, if that is past the bloom of youth, [...] Let them marry." - 1 Corinthians 7: 36
Ideally, the simplest solution is to marry someone who has the same intense and zealous faith in God you have. (God instructs us not to be unevenly 'yoked with an unbeliever' and to marry "only in the Lord". (2 Corinthians 7: 14-18) "[W]hat portion does a faithful person have with an unbeliever?", he asks. (1 Corinthians 7:39) It is clear. He does not look favorably upon disloyal ones who marry a person who does not have true faith in Him.)
But, seeing as how you're perhaps not yet "past the bloom of youth" this really isn't an option for you right now. :D So what do you do in the meantime?
First off, keep things in perspective. Having sexual feelings is completely normal. They are not an indication of a lack of faith or a weak relationship with God so there's no need to recriminate yourself for having them. You can no more control your sexual urges than you can feelings of hunger or thirst.
Your natural sexual impulses are nothing more than a gift from your Creator intended for you to enjoy exclusively with your spouse within the bounds of a loving marriage. What you can control, however, is how you behave. Because you were created with Free Will, you ALWAYS have complete control over what you decide to do at any time (assuming, of course, you're not contending with a mental illness).
With that said, here are some scriptural principles that can be helpful to you:
"Flee from fornication." (1 Corinthians 6:18) Fornication, if you recall, comes from the Greek 'porneia' and is defined as "illicit sexual intercourse". This includes adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals (bestiality), sexual intercourse with close relatives or sexual intercourse with an illicitly divorced man or woman. Because the counsel here is to "flee from fornication" it's obvious that you should avoid compromising situations, sexually stimulating materials of all kinds and even sexually charged conversations. "Let fornication and uncleanness of every sort [...] not even be mentioned among YOU" we're admonished in Ephesians 5: 3-4, "just as it befits holy people; neither shameful conduct nor foolish talking nor obscene jesting, things which are not becoming [...]." The warning is clear. Steer clear of anything, ANYTHING that can inflame your sexual passions.
This also means that you need to avoid masturbation and other forms of sexual gratification. While many will tell you that there's nothing wrong with gratifying yourself, what they fail to mention is that those who habitually view pornographic material and then masturbate end up suffering from an obsessive-compulsive disorder. Make no mistake, developing an obsessive-compulsive disorder will wreak havoc on your life for many, many years.
Don't misunderstand now. I'm not advising you to repress your sexual feelings. As I mentioned earlier, your sexual impulses are a natural biological function that were not designed to be "turned off". Trying to repress them is an exercise in futility and will only leave you feeling exhausted, frustrated and feeling very, very guilty. This is something you need to be wary of because persistent feelings of guilt can trigger clinical Depression and that's not what God wants for you.
In time, though, the intensity of your sexual impulses should subside. That too is a natural function of your design as you mature.
So, what can you do on those rare occasions when your sexual impulses surge to overwhelm you? It's simple. Distract yourself. It won't be easy at first but the more you practice, the easier it will become because your urges will be less intense each time.
Now, consider the following: "[B]ecome steadfast, unmovable, always having plenty to do in the work of the Lord []." (1 Corinthians 15:58) What work is this passage referring to? Well, shortly after his resurrection, Jesus met with his disciples and gave them the following task, "Go therefore and make disciples of people of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the holy spirit, teaching them to observe all the things I have commanded YOU." (Matthew 28: 19, 20) And that they did.
The responsibility these faithful ones received extends even to our day. But, you can't teach others what you don't know, right? So, before you can become a teacher, you first have to be a student. Have you read the Bible in its entirety, from beginning to end? If not, why not set aside 5 minutes each day to do so? Making a habit out of reading from the Bible daily will teach you amazing things about God you've never known before and you'll be much too busy to be bothered by intrusive thoughts.
Remember too that heartfelt prayer is a ready resource for all looking to please God and lead happy, fulfilled lives. "For all things I have the strength by virtue of him who imparts power to me" Paul was inspired to write. (Phillipians 4:13)
Ultimately, God "is not far off from each one of us". (Acts 17:27) If you make every effort to learn about and love him "with your whole heart and with your whole soul and with your whole mind", he will stay by your side, "[f]or, as regards Jehovah, his eyes are roving about through all the earth to show his strength in behalf of those whose heart is complete toward him." (Matthew 22: 36-38; 2 Chronicles 16:9)
Jo_Polanco@Hotmail.com
Additional Resources -- http://bit.ly/npB0v4 , http://bit.ly/znpAMP , http://bit.ly/Ay836f , http://bit.ly/Ah5Uz8
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Please answer me guys! Im a 14 year old girl and when ever i try and masturbate, i feel absoultley nothing sexual. I do get sexual urges but i have no feeling down there. THANK YOU FOR UR ANSWERS (link)
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"If anyone thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virginity, if that is past the bloom of youth, [...] Let them marry." - 1 Corinthians 7: 36
Ideally, the simplest solution is to marry someone who has the same intense and zealous faith in God you have. (God instructs us not to be unevenly 'yoked with an unbeliever' and to marry "only in the Lord". (2 Corinthians 7: 14-18) "[W]hat portion does a faithful person have with an unbeliever?", he asks. (1 Corinthians 7:39) It is clear. He does not look favorably upon disloyal ones who marry a person who does not have true faith in Him.)
But, seeing as how you're perhaps not yet "past the bloom of youth" this really isn't an option for you right now. :D So what do you do in the meantime?
First off, keep things in perspective. Having sexual feelings is completely normal. They are not an indication of a lack of faith or a weak relationship with God so there's no need to recriminate yourself for having them. You can no more control your sexual urges than you can feelings of hunger or thirst.
Your natural sexual impulses are nothing more than a gift from your Creator intended for you to enjoy exclusively with your spouse within the bounds of a loving marriage. What you can control, however, is how you behave. Because you were created with Free Will, you ALWAYS have complete control over what you decide to do at any time (assuming, of course, you're not contending with a mental illness).
With that said, here are some scriptural principles that can be helpful to you:
"Flee from fornication." (1 Corinthians 6:18) Fornication, if you recall, comes from the Greek 'porneia' and is defined as "illicit sexual intercourse". This includes adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals (bestiality), sexual intercourse with close relatives or sexual intercourse with an illicitly divorced man or woman. Because the counsel here is to "flee from fornication" it's obvious that you should avoid compromising situations, sexually stimulating materials of all kinds and even sexually charged conversations. "Let fornication and uncleanness of every sort [...] not even be mentioned among YOU" we're admonished in Ephesians 5: 3-4, "just as it befits holy people; neither shameful conduct nor foolish talking nor obscene jesting, things which are not becoming [...]." The warning is clear. Steer clear of anything, ANYTHING that can inflame your sexual passions.
This also means that you need to avoid masturbation and other forms of sexual gratification. While many will tell you that there's nothing wrong with gratifying yourself, what they fail to mention is that those who habitually view pornographic material and then masturbate end up suffering from an obsessive-compulsive disorder. Make no mistake, developing an obsessive-compulsive disorder will wreak havoc on your life for many, many years.
Don't misunderstand now. I'm not advising you to repress your sexual feelings. As I mentioned earlier, your sexual impulses are a natural biological function that were not designed to be "turned off". Trying to repress them is an exercise in futility and will only leave you feeling exhausted, frustrated and feeling very, very guilty. This is something you need to be wary of because persistent feelings of guilt can trigger clinical Depression and that's not what God wants for you.
In time, though, the intensity of your sexual impulses should subside. That too is a natural function of your design as you mature.
So, what can you do on those rare occasions when your sexual impulses surge to overwhelm you? It's simple. Distract yourself. It won't be easy at first but the more you practice, the easier it will become because your urges will be less intense each time.
Now, consider the following: "[B]ecome steadfast, unmovable, always having plenty to do in the work of the Lord []." (1 Corinthians 15:58) What work is this passage referring to? Well, shortly after his resurrection, Jesus met with his disciples and gave them the following task, "Go therefore and make disciples of people of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the holy spirit, teaching them to observe all the things I have commanded YOU." (Matthew 28: 19, 20) And that they did.
The responsibility these faithful ones received extends even to our day. But, you can't teach others what you don't know, right? So, before you can become a teacher, you first have to be a student. Have you read the Bible in its entirety, from beginning to end? If not, why not set aside 5 minutes each day to do so? Making a habit out of reading from the Bible daily will teach you amazing things about God you've never known before and you'll be much too busy to be bothered by intrusive thoughts.
Remember too that heartfelt prayer is a ready resource for all looking to please God and lead happy, fulfilled lives. "For all things I have the strength by virtue of him who imparts power to me" Paul was inspired to write. (Phillipians 4:13)
Ultimately, God "is not far off from each one of us". (Acts 17:27) If you make every effort to learn about and love him "with your whole heart and with your whole soul and with your whole mind", he will stay by your side, "[f]or, as regards Jehovah, his eyes are roving about through all the earth to show his strength in behalf of those whose heart is complete toward him." (Matthew 22: 36-38; 2 Chronicles 16:9)
Jo_Polanco@Hotmail.com
Additional Resources -- http://bit.ly/npB0v4 , http://bit.ly/znpAMP , http://bit.ly/Ay836f , http://bit.ly/Ah5Uz8
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14/f
This is a lame question. Buuut.
Okay for a long time my boyfriend and I have done stuff like fingering and that but he's gone away to Europe for 2 months. I keep getting sexual urges.
Okay. sooo. what are the best ways of masturbating. like if you dont have a vibrator. just wondering.
thankies. (link)
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"If anyone thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virginity, if that is past the bloom of youth, [...] Let them marry." - 1 Corinthians 7: 36
Ideally, the simplest solution is to marry someone who has the same intense and zealous faith in God you have. (God instructs us not to be unevenly 'yoked with an unbeliever' and to marry "only in the Lord". (2 Corinthians 7: 14-18) "[W]hat portion does a faithful person have with an unbeliever?", he asks. (1 Corinthians 7:39) It is clear. He does not look favorably upon disloyal ones who marry a person who does not have true faith in Him.)
But, seeing as how you're perhaps not yet "past the bloom of youth" this really isn't an option for you right now. :D So what do you do in the meantime?
First off, keep things in perspective. Having sexual feelings is completely normal. They are not an indication of a lack of faith or a weak relationship with God so there's no need to recriminate yourself for having them. You can no more control your sexual urges than you can feelings of hunger or thirst.
Your natural sexual impulses are nothing more than a gift from your Creator intended for you to enjoy exclusively with your spouse within the bounds of a loving marriage. What you can control, however, is how you behave. Because you were created with Free Will, you ALWAYS have complete control over what you decide to do at any time (assuming, of course, you're not contending with a mental illness).
With that said, here are some scriptural principles that can be helpful to you:
"Flee from fornication." (1 Corinthians 6:18) Fornication, if you recall, comes from the Greek 'porneia' and is defined as "illicit sexual intercourse". This includes adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals (bestiality), sexual intercourse with close relatives or sexual intercourse with an illicitly divorced man or woman. Because the counsel here is to "flee from fornication" it's obvious that you should avoid compromising situations, sexually stimulating materials of all kinds and even sexually charged conversations. "Let fornication and uncleanness of every sort [...] not even be mentioned among YOU" we're admonished in Ephesians 5: 3-4, "just as it befits holy people; neither shameful conduct nor foolish talking nor obscene jesting, things which are not becoming [...]." The warning is clear. Steer clear of anything, ANYTHING that can inflame your sexual passions.
This also means that you need to avoid masturbation and other forms of sexual gratification. While many will tell you that there's nothing wrong with gratifying yourself, what they fail to mention is that those who habitually view pornographic material and then masturbate end up suffering from an obsessive-compulsive disorder. Make no mistake, developing an obsessive-compulsive disorder will wreak havoc on your life for many, many years.
Don't misunderstand now. I'm not advising you to repress your sexual feelings. As I mentioned earlier, your sexual impulses are a natural biological function that were not designed to be "turned off". Trying to repress them is an exercise in futility and will only leave you feeling exhausted, frustrated and feeling very, very guilty. This is something you need to be wary of because persistent feelings of guilt can trigger clinical Depression and that's not what God wants for you.
In time, though, the intensity of your sexual impulses should subside. That too is a natural function of your design as you mature.
So, what can you do on those rare occasions when your sexual impulses surge to overwhelm you? It's simple. Distract yourself. It won't be easy at first but the more you practice, the easier it will become because your urges will be less intense each time.
Now, consider the following: "[B]ecome steadfast, unmovable, always having plenty to do in the work of the Lord []." (1 Corinthians 15:58) What work is this passage referring to? Well, shortly after his resurrection, Jesus met with his disciples and gave them the following task, "Go therefore and make disciples of people of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the holy spirit, teaching them to observe all the things I have commanded YOU." (Matthew 28: 19, 20) And that they did.
The responsibility these faithful ones received extends even to our day. But, you can't teach others what you don't know, right? So, before you can become a teacher, you first have to be a student. Have you read the Bible in its entirety, from beginning to end? If not, why not set aside 5 minutes each day to do so? Making a habit out of reading from the Bible daily will teach you amazing things about God you've never known before and you'll be much too busy to be bothered by intrusive thoughts.
Remember too that heartfelt prayer is a ready resource for all looking to please God and lead happy, fulfilled lives. "For all things I have the strength by virtue of him who imparts power to me" Paul was inspired to write. (Phillipians 4:13)
Ultimately, God "is not far off from each one of us". (Acts 17:27) If you make every effort to learn about and love him "with your whole heart and with your whole soul and with your whole mind", he will stay by your side, "[f]or, as regards Jehovah, his eyes are roving about through all the earth to show his strength in behalf of those whose heart is complete toward him." (Matthew 22: 36-38; 2 Chronicles 16:9)
Jo_Polanco@Hotmail.com
Additional Resources -- http://bit.ly/npB0v4 , http://bit.ly/znpAMP , http://bit.ly/Ay836f , http://bit.ly/Ah5Uz8
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15.f
i know it's normal to experience sexual urges, especially at my age. i recently have been fantasizing myself with two of my best guyfriends (NOT AT THE SAME TIME.) although i don't have crushes on either of them, and both have had crushes on me. i'm not at all attracted to them but i just keep thinking about it. it's really weird for me and i'm really confused. i'd never date either of them but what should i do?! why is this happening, and why with THEM? is it just because i talk to them often and i'm really close with them? has this ever happened to anyone else, and what happened? (link)
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"If anyone thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virginity, if that is past the bloom of youth, [...] Let them marry." - 1 Corinthians 7: 36
Ideally, the simplest solution is to marry someone who has the same intense and zealous faith in God you have. (God instructs us not to be unevenly 'yoked with an unbeliever' and to marry "only in the Lord". (2 Corinthians 7: 14-18) "[W]hat portion does a faithful person have with an unbeliever?", he asks. (1 Corinthians 7:39) It is clear. He does not look favorably upon disloyal ones who marry a person who does not have true faith in Him.)
But, seeing as how you're perhaps not yet "past the bloom of youth" this really isn't an option for you right now. :D So what do you do in the meantime?
First off, keep things in perspective. Having sexual feelings is completely normal. They are not an indication of a lack of faith or a weak relationship with God so there's no need to recriminate yourself for having them. You can no more control your sexual urges than you can feelings of hunger or thirst.
Your natural sexual impulses are nothing more than a gift from your Creator intended for you to enjoy exclusively with your spouse within the bounds of a loving marriage. What you can control, however, is how you behave. Because you were created with Free Will, you ALWAYS have complete control over what you decide to do at any time (assuming, of course, you're not contending with a mental illness).
With that said, here are some scriptural principles that can be helpful to you:
"Flee from fornication." (1 Corinthians 6:18) Fornication, if you recall, comes from the Greek 'porneia' and is defined as "illicit sexual intercourse". This includes adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals (bestiality), sexual intercourse with close relatives or sexual intercourse with an illicitly divorced man or woman. Because the counsel here is to "flee from fornication" it's obvious that you should avoid compromising situations, sexually stimulating materials of all kinds and even sexually charged conversations. "Let fornication and uncleanness of every sort [...] not even be mentioned among YOU" we're admonished in Ephesians 5: 3-4, "just as it befits holy people; neither shameful conduct nor foolish talking nor obscene jesting, things which are not becoming [...]." The warning is clear. Steer clear of anything, ANYTHING that can inflame your sexual passions.
This also means that you need to avoid masturbation and other forms of sexual gratification. While many will tell you that there's nothing wrong with gratifying yourself, what they fail to mention is that those who habitually view pornographic material and then masturbate end up suffering from an obsessive-compulsive disorder. Make no mistake, developing an obsessive-compulsive disorder will wreak havoc on your life for many, many years.
Don't misunderstand now. I'm not advising you to repress your sexual feelings. As I mentioned earlier, your sexual impulses are a natural biological function that were not designed to be "turned off". Trying to repress them is an exercise in futility and will only leave you feeling exhausted, frustrated and feeling very, very guilty. This is something you need to be wary of because persistent feelings of guilt can trigger clinical Depression and that's not what God wants for you.
In time, though, the intensity of your sexual impulses should subside. That too is a natural function of your design as you mature.
So, what can you do on those rare occasions when your sexual impulses surge to overwhelm you? It's simple. Distract yourself. It won't be easy at first but the more you practice, the easier it will become because your urges will be less intense each time.
Now, consider the following: "[B]ecome steadfast, unmovable, always having plenty to do in the work of the Lord []." (1 Corinthians 15:58) What work is this passage referring to? Well, shortly after his resurrection, Jesus met with his disciples and gave them the following task, "Go therefore and make disciples of people of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the holy spirit, teaching them to observe all the things I have commanded YOU." (Matthew 28: 19, 20) And that they did.
The responsibility these faithful ones received extends even to our day. But, you can't teach others what you don't know, right? So, before you can become a teacher, you first have to be a student. Have you read the Bible in its entirety, from beginning to end? If not, why not set aside 5 minutes each day to do so? Making a habit out of reading from the Bible daily will teach you amazing things about God you've never known before and you'll be much too busy to be bothered by intrusive thoughts.
Remember too that heartfelt prayer is a ready resource for all looking to please God and lead happy, fulfilled lives. "For all things I have the strength by virtue of him who imparts power to me" Paul was inspired to write. (Phillipians 4:13)
Ultimately, God "is not far off from each one of us". (Acts 17:27) If you make every effort to learn about and love him "with your whole heart and with your whole soul and with your whole mind", he will stay by your side, "[f]or, as regards Jehovah, his eyes are roving about through all the earth to show his strength in behalf of those whose heart is complete toward him." (Matthew 22: 36-38; 2 Chronicles 16:9)
Jo_Polanco@Hotmail.com
Additional Resources -- http://bit.ly/npB0v4 , http://bit.ly/znpAMP , http://bit.ly/Ay836f , http://bit.ly/Ah5Uz8
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how do you stop watching pornography,sexual urges etc.
if christian, feel free to add any usable bible quotes to memorise to abstain from these things
AGE: 13
GENDER: MALE (link)
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"If anyone thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virginity, if that is past the bloom of youth, [...] Let them marry." - 1 Corinthians 7: 36
Ideally, the simplest solution is to marry someone who has the same intense and zealous faith in God you have. (God instructs us not to be unevenly 'yoked with an unbeliever' and to marry "only in the Lord". (2 Corinthians 7: 14-18) "[W]hat portion does a faithful person have with an unbeliever?", he asks. (1 Corinthians 7:39) It is clear. He does not look favorably upon disloyal ones who marry a person who does not have true faith in Him.)
But, seeing as how you're perhaps not yet "past the bloom of youth" this really isn't an option for you right now. :D So what do you do in the meantime?
First off, keep things in perspective. Having sexual feelings is completely normal. They are not an indication of a lack of faith or a weak relationship with God so there's no need to recriminate yourself for having them. You can no more control your sexual urges than you can feelings of hunger or thirst.
Your natural sexual impulses are nothing more than a gift from your Creator intended for you to enjoy exclusively with your spouse within the bounds of a loving marriage. What you can control, however, is how you behave. Because you were created with Free Will, you ALWAYS have complete control over what you decide to do at any time (assuming, of course, you're not contending with a mental illness).
With that said, here are some scriptural principles that can be helpful to you:
"Flee from fornication." (1 Corinthians 6:18) Fornication, if you recall, comes from the Greek 'porneia' and is defined as "illicit sexual intercourse". This includes adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals (bestiality), sexual intercourse with close relatives or sexual intercourse with an illicitly divorced man or woman. Because the counsel here is to "flee from fornication" it's obvious that you should avoid compromising situations, sexually stimulating materials of all kinds and even sexually charged conversations. "Let fornication and uncleanness of every sort [...] not even be mentioned among YOU" we're admonished in Ephesians 5: 3-4, "just as it befits holy people; neither shameful conduct nor foolish talking nor obscene jesting, things which are not becoming [...]." The warning is clear. Steer clear of anything, ANYTHING that can inflame your sexual passions.
This also means that you need to avoid masturbation and other forms of sexual gratification. While many will tell you that there's nothing wrong with gratifying yourself, what they fail to mention is that those who habitually view pornographic material and then masturbate end up suffering from an obsessive-compulsive disorder. Make no mistake, developing an obsessive-compulsive disorder will wreak havoc on your life for many, many years.
Don't misunderstand now. I'm not advising you to repress your sexual feelings. As I mentioned earlier, your sexual impulses are a natural biological function that were not designed to be "turned off". Trying to repress them is an exercise in futility and will only leave you feeling exhausted, frustrated and feeling very, very guilty. This is something you need to be wary of because persistent feelings of guilt can trigger clinical Depression and that's not what God wants for you.
In time, though, the intensity of your sexual impulses should subside. That too is a natural function of your design as you mature.
So, what can you do on those rare occasions when your sexual impulses surge to overwhelm you? It's simple. Distract yourself. It won't be easy at first but the more you practice, the easier it will become because your urges will be less intense each time.
Now, consider the following: "[B]ecome steadfast, unmovable, always having plenty to do in the work of the Lord []." (1 Corinthians 15:58) What work is this passage referring to? Well, shortly after his resurrection, Jesus met with his disciples and gave them the following task, "Go therefore and make disciples of people of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the holy spirit, teaching them to observe all the things I have commanded YOU." (Matthew 28: 19, 20) And that they did.
The responsibility these faithful ones received extends even to our day. But, you can't teach others what you don't know, right? So, before you can become a teacher, you first have to be a student. Have you read the Bible in its entirety, from beginning to end? If not, why not set aside 5 minutes each day to do so? Making a habit out of reading from the Bible daily will teach you amazing things about God you've never known before and you'll be much too busy to be bothered by intrusive thoughts.
Remember too that heartfelt prayer is a ready resource for all looking to please God and lead happy, fulfilled lives. "For all things I have the strength by virtue of him who imparts power to me" Paul was inspired to write. (Phillipians 4:13)
Ultimately, God "is not far off from each one of us". (Acts 17:27) If you make every effort to learn about and love him "with your whole heart and with your whole soul and with your whole mind", he will stay by your side, "[f]or, as regards Jehovah, his eyes are roving about through all the earth to show his strength in behalf of those whose heart is complete toward him." (Matthew 22: 36-38; 2 Chronicles 16:9)
Jo_Polanco@Hotmail.com
Additional Resources -- http://bit.ly/npB0v4 , http://bit.ly/znpAMP , http://bit.ly/Ay836f , http://bit.ly/Ah5Uz8
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im a 15 year old boy and im having relationship issues with my 17 year old girlfriend of three months. we love each other and we have a really strong connection, but i can barely control myself around her. we are Christians and we know that sex before marriage is wrong and we've been trying to control our urges, but she has alot more self control than i do. once we start making out, i'm always ready to take it to the next level and try to get in her pants, but i promised her i wouldn't do anything and i just cant help it. i love her and since she's a senior and this will be our only year together, i don't want our relationship to end before it has to. we are on the brink of breaking up because of me and i cant loose her. how can i control my sexual urges better?!?!?!?!?!??!?!!?!?!?? (link)
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"If anyone thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virginity, if that is past the bloom of youth, [...] Let them marry." - 1 Corinthians 7: 36
Ideally, the simplest solution is to marry someone who has the same intense and zealous faith in God you have. (God instructs us not to be unevenly 'yoked with an unbeliever' and to marry "only in the Lord". (2 Corinthians 7: 14-18) "[W]hat portion does a faithful person have with an unbeliever?", he asks. (1 Corinthians 7:39) It is clear. He does not look favorably upon disloyal ones who marry a person who does not have true faith in Him.)
But, seeing as how you're perhaps not yet "past the bloom of youth" this really isn't an option for you right now. :D So what do you do in the meantime?
First off, keep things in perspective. Having sexual feelings is completely normal. They are not an indication of a lack of faith or a weak relationship with God so there's no need to recriminate yourself for having them. You can no more control your sexual urges than you can feelings of hunger or thirst.
Your natural sexual impulses are nothing more than a gift from your Creator intended for you to enjoy exclusively with your spouse within the bounds of a loving marriage. What you can control, however, is how you behave. Because you were created with Free Will, you ALWAYS have complete control over what you decide to do at any time (assuming, of course, you're not contending with a mental illness).
With that said, here are some scriptural principles that can be helpful to you:
"Flee from fornication." (1 Corinthians 6:18) Fornication, if you recall, comes from the Greek 'porneia' and is defined as "illicit sexual intercourse". This includes adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals (bestiality), sexual intercourse with close relatives or sexual intercourse with an illicitly divorced man or woman. Because the counsel here is to "flee from fornication" it's obvious that you should avoid compromising situations, sexually stimulating materials of all kinds and even sexually charged conversations. "Let fornication and uncleanness of every sort [...] not even be mentioned among YOU" we're admonished in Ephesians 5: 3-4, "just as it befits holy people; neither shameful conduct nor foolish talking nor obscene jesting, things which are not becoming [...]." The warning is clear. Steer clear of anything, ANYTHING that can inflame your sexual passions.
This also means that you need to avoid masturbation and other forms of sexual gratification. While many will tell you that there's nothing wrong with gratifying yourself, what they fail to mention is that those who habitually view pornographic material and then masturbate end up suffering from an obsessive-compulsive disorder. Make no mistake, developing an obsessive-compulsive disorder will wreak havoc on your life for many, many years.
Don't misunderstand now. I'm not advising you to repress your sexual feelings. As I mentioned earlier, your sexual impulses are a natural biological function that were not designed to be "turned off". Trying to repress them is an exercise in futility and will only leave you feeling exhausted, frustrated and feeling very, very guilty. This is something you need to be wary of because persistent feelings of guilt can trigger clinical Depression and that's not what God wants for you.
In time, though, the intensity of your sexual impulses should subside. That too is a natural function of your design as you mature.
So, what can you do on those rare occasions when your sexual impulses surge to overwhelm you? It's simple. Distract yourself. It won't be easy at first but the more you practice, the easier it will become because your urges will be less intense each time.
Now, consider the following: "[B]ecome steadfast, unmovable, always having plenty to do in the work of the Lord []." (1 Corinthians 15:58) What work is this passage referring to? Well, shortly after his resurrection, Jesus met with his disciples and gave them the following task, "Go therefore and make disciples of people of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the holy spirit, teaching them to observe all the things I have commanded YOU." (Matthew 28: 19, 20) And that they did.
The responsibility these faithful ones received extends even to our day. But, you can't teach others what you don't know, right? So, before you can become a teacher, you first have to be a student. Have you read the Bible in its entirety, from beginning to end? If not, why not set aside 5 minutes each day to do so? Making a habit out of reading from the Bible daily will teach you amazing things about God you've never known before and you'll be much too busy to be bothered by intrusive thoughts.
Remember too that heartfelt prayer is a ready resource for all looking to please God and lead happy, fulfilled lives. "For all things I have the strength by virtue of him who imparts power to me" Paul was inspired to write. (Phillipians 4:13)
Ultimately, God "is not far off from each one of us". (Acts 17:27) If you make every effort to learn about and love him "with your whole heart and with your whole soul and with your whole mind", he will stay by your side, "[f]or, as regards Jehovah, his eyes are roving about through all the earth to show his strength in behalf of those whose heart is complete toward him." (Matthew 22: 36-38; 2 Chronicles 16:9)
Jo_Polanco@Hotmail.com
Additional Resources -- http://bit.ly/npB0v4 , http://bit.ly/znpAMP , http://bit.ly/Ay836f , http://bit.ly/Ah5Uz8
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How do Christians deal with what they consider inappropriate sexual urges? I am a teenage girl and I have desires that I know are wrong to fulfill until I am married, and because I am Christian and believe the word of God.
For example:
Desires for a person that a Christian is not married to.
Desires for a person who is not Christian.
Desires for a person who is of the same gender.
I understand that I cannot make the sexual urges suddenly go away since they have to do with hormones and maturing, but how can I keep them under control as a Christian? I love God and I do not want to disrespect Him or my body by giving into sexual desires in this inappropriate time.
I want to be the best Christian I can be and I know that means controlling myself when it comes to sexual activity. Are there ways to limit these desires to very infrequent times or are they something I cannot lessen no matter what?
I am also considering speaking to my pastor about this problem but I would like to know if that is appropriate to do in the first place.
Any advice is appreciated! (link)
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“If anyone thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virginity, if that is past the bloom of youth, [...] Let them marry.” - 1 Corinthians 7: 36
Ideally, the simplest way for you to handle your situation is to marry someone who has the same intense and zealous faith in God you have. (God instructs us to avoid being unevenly 'yoked with an unbeliever' by marrying “only in the Lord”, in other words, by only marrying one who shares our same faith in God. “[W]hat portion does a faithful person have with an unbeliever? ”, he asks. (2 Corinthians 7: 14-18; 1 Corinthians 7:39) His point of view is clear. He does not look favourably upon those who are disloyal to him and marry someone who does not have true faith in Him.)
But, seeing as how you're not yet “past the bloom of youth” this really isn't an option for you right now. :D So what do you do in the meantime?
First off, keep things in perspective. Having sexual feelings is completely normal. You should not be beating yourself up at all for having them. They are not an indication of a lack of faith or a weak relationship with God. In fact, you can no more control your sexual urges than you can your feelings of hunger or thirst. These natural, biological feelings you were created with weren't designed to be “turned off” at will.
Your natural sexual impulses are nothing more than a gift from your Creator intended for you to enjoy exclusively with your husband within the bounds of a loving marriage. What you can control, however, is how you behave. Because you were created with Free Will, you ALWAYS have complete control over what you decide to do at any time.
With that said, here are some scriptural principles you can use to help you continue to be pleasing in the eyes of God:
“Flee from fornication.” (1 Corinthians 6:18)
Fornication, if you remember, comes from the Greek 'porneia' and is defined as “illicit sexual intercourse”. This includes adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals (bestiality), sexual intercourse with close relatives or sexual intercourse with a divorced man or woman.
Because the counsel here is to “flee from fornication” it's obvious that you should do everything possible to avoid compromising situations, sexually stimulating materials of all kinds and even sexually charged conversations. “Let fornication and uncleanness of every sort [...] not even be mentioned among YOU” we're admonished in Ephesians 5: 3-4, “just as it befits holy people; neither shameful conduct nor foolish talking nor obscene jesting, things which are not becoming [...].” The warning is clear. Steer clear of anything, ANYTHING that can inflame your sexual passions.
Here's another helpful scriptural principle you can use:
“Deaden, therefore, YOUR body members that are upon the earth as respects fornication, uncleanness, sexual appetite, hurtful desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. […] Strip off the old personality with its practices, and clothe yourselves with the new [personality], which through accurate knowledge is being made new according to the image of the One who created it,” - Colossians 3: 5, 9 &10
This means that you should, to the best of your ability, avoid all sexually stimulating material. This includes movies, photos, music, books, etc., etc. Basically, if it turns you on, you need to avoid consuming it.
This also means that you need to avoid any and all types of masturbation and other forms of sexual gratification. While many will tell you that there's nothing wrong with gratifying yourself, what they fail to mention is that those who habitually view pornographic material and then masturbate end up developing and suffering from an obsessive-compulsive disorder. Make no mistake, developing an obsessive-compulsive disorder will wreak havoc on your life and may very well take years of intense psychotherapy so that you can finally break free of it.
Don't misunderstand now. I'm not advising you to repress your sexual feelings. As I mentioned earlier, your sexual impulses are a natural biological function that were not designed to be “turned off”. Trying to repress them is an exercise in futility and will only leave you feeling exhausted, frustrated and very, very guilty. This is something you need to be very wary of because persistent feelings of excessive guilt can cause clinical Depression and that's not what God wants for you.
Everything I've shared with you so far is intended to help you minimize the intensity of your sexual impulses but this doesn't mean you'll never feel them especially now that your body is undergoing its transformation to its adult form. In time, the intensity of your sexual impulses should subside. That too is a natural function of your design.
So, what can you do on those rare occasions when your sexual impulses surge to overwhelm you?
It's simple. Distract yourself. Focus your mind's attention on something else.
It won't be easy at first but the more you practice, the easier it will become because your urges will be less intense each time and, more importantly, you'll have the self-control and self-discipline needed to behave correctly in the eyes of your Creator.
The fact is, as Christians, we've already been charged with THE most important responsibility we could possibly have. This is why 1 Corinthians 15:58 reminds us to “[...] [B]ecome steadfast, unmovable, always having plenty to do in the work of the Lord, knowing that YOUR labor is not in vain in connection with [the] Lord.
What responsibility am I referring to, you ask? Shortly after his resurrection, Jesus met with his disciples in Galilee and gave them the following task, “Go therefore and make disciples of people of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the holy spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all the things I have commanded YOU.” (Matthew 28: 19, 20) And that they did. The Bible book of Acts details how they zealously sought willing ones to teach them all the things Jesus had taught them and how Jehovah God blessed them for their efforts. It wasn't easy but it was met with God's glowing approval.
But, you can't teach others what you don't know, right? So, before you can become a masterful teacher, you first have to be a diligent student. Have you read the Bible in its entirety, from beginning to end? If not, why not set aside 5 minutes each day to do so? By making a habit out of reading from the Bible every day, not only will you learn amazing things about God you've never known before but you'll be waayy too busy to be bothered by any kind of intrusive thoughts.
In fact, why not pray about this? This has always been a ready resource for all those looking to please God and lead happy, fulfilled lives. “For all things I have the strength by virtue of him who imparts power to me.” Paul was inspired to write once. (Phillipians 4:13)
Remember, God “is not far off from each one of us”. (Acts 17:27) If you make every effort to learn about and love him “with your whole heart and with your whole soul and with your whole mind”, he will stay by your side, “[f]or, as regards Jehovah, his eyes are roving about through all the earth to show his strength in behalf of those whose heart is complete toward him.” (Matthew 22: 36-38; 2 Chronicles 16:9)
Regards,
Jo_Polanco@Hotmail.com
Additional Resources:
http://tinyurl.com/ydo8zwr
http://tinyurl.com/yorfcu
http://tinyurl.com/63rk9p6
http://tinyurl.com/653cvrc
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