_______Your Life_______
[x] they call me: Chardonnay, Chardy, Char, Charcoal, Nae-nae, Akane
[x] sex: Female
[x] my first breath of air: June 5, 1989
[x] status: Single
[x] friends: Michiru, & lotz more! (too many to name! ^_^!)
_______Rewind_______
[x] most memorable memory: Christmas lighting in LeavenWorth…(Evil is Fun!)
[x] worst?: …getting caught…
[x] first word uttered?: papa
[x] first best friend ever?: Silvia
_______Love?_______
[x] love is: “the heart is more treacherous than anything else and is desperate. Who can know it?” (Jeremiah 17:9)
[x] first love: Kevin…4th grade
[x] love or lust?: Love
[x] is it possible to be in love w/ more than one person at the same time: …I dunno
[x] when love hurts, you: pretend like it doesn’t
[x] true or false: all you need is love: …uh, true!
[x] is there such thing as love @ first sight?: um..nah, I don’t think so
[x] how many times have you been in love?: Blah!
_______Opposite Sex_______
[x] turn ons: smile! Sweet talker! Not afraid to speak his mind, yet kind! (eyeliner sigh -.-‘)
[x] do your parent's opinion on your bf/gf matter to you?: yes
[x] what kinda hair style?: Jet Black, long bangs (-.-‘ hard to explain)
[x] the sweetest thing a member of the opposite sex can do for you?: Surprise me, talk to me! Understand me!
[x] where do you go to meet new people?: Get-togethers, dances!
[x] are you the type of person to HOLLER and ask for numbers?: nope
_______Picky Picky_______
[x] dog or cat: CAT
[x] short or long hair: … both
[x] sunshine or rain: Rain
[x] moon or sun: Moon
[x] 1 best friend or 10 acquaintances: 1 bestest! Bu lots n lots a friends ^__^
[x] summer or winter: uh, swimming and snowboarding!!!
[x] written letters or e-mails: e-mails
[x] play station or nintendo: PS2!!!
[x] car or motorcycle: Motorcycle
[x] house party or club: …depends…who’s house?
[x] sing or dance: Singing
_______Lately_______
[x] how are you today? …Weird…Sleepy!!!
[x] what pants are you wearing right now? Blue sweats
[x] what shirt are you wearing right now? Black cami
[x] what does your hair look like at the moment? Pony tail..long
[x] what song are u listening to right now? The Ghost of You, by Chemical Romance
[x] how is the weather right now? cold
[x] last person you talked to on the phone? Elihu(making fun of my Broncos! T-T )
[x] last dream you can remember? It was weird!
[x] who are you talking to right now? No one
[x] what time is it? 10:06 PM
_______More About YOU!_______
[x] what are the last four digits of your phone number? Uh...7292
[x] if u were a crayon, what color would you be? Green or Orange
[x] have you ever almost died? Nah, I said I have b-4 though! (-.-‘ long story)
[x] have u ever won any special award? Uh, second place in all girls race
[x] what's the stupidest thing u have ever done? Hehe, I walked outside in jus a fondo! Ha, it was an accidect -.-‘
[x] how many kids do you want to have? 2 to 4
[x] son's name? Malichi or Merlot
[x] daughter's name? Micah
[x] what are you most scared of? Uh… LOVE!!! Sharks (I have a fish fobia, and talking to people fobia, I know lame -.-‘)
[x] how many TV's do you have in your house? 3
[x] do you have your own TV? yes
[x] have you ever broken/sprained/fractured a bone? nope
[x] who do you dream about? Friends & Love
[x] who do you tell your dreams to? Uh…blah
[x] is cheerleading a sport? Sorry bu no! Drill is… a weird sport…
[x] how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Heh, I haven’t figured it out yet! Darn!… (I’ve really tried… many, many times! -.-‘)
_______You And Love_______
[x] do you have a girlfriend or boyfriend? nope
[x] where would you like to go on your honeymoon? Uh… blah, I don’t want to choose a place to have sex! How lame!
[x] what do you like most of the opposite sex? Hair & interests!
[x] do you find yourself attractive? NOOO!!! … -.-‘ (I’m not conceded, prick!)
E-mail: senoritakittychar@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: I live in WA, bu originaly form Cali!
Age: 16
Member Since: October 27, 2005
Answers: 3
Last Update: October 27, 2005
Visitors: 1202
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I have this friend. She has been my friend all of my life literally but lately we've been drawing apart. :( what do i do to get this relationship back togeter? (link)
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Make a date and have her over! Stay up all night and just chat! about everything! Your whole life, memorys together when you were younger! trust me it helps! ^^! It'll help her to remember how good friends you are! Let her know that she can tust you! She'll may realize that she needs you!
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I'm glad I can let this out and no one will know who I am or bug me about it, but I really need someone to talk to. I've been broken for years upon years, my elementary school life was alright yet I always seemed to be the loner kid who did stupid things to get attention yet was never acknowledged. When I changed schools, it made me sad that the card I had received from my classmates was only made because we do that to everyone who goes away, that the words they said to me were false and untrue. In my new school, the very first day I was tormented and they hit me with carrots at lunch time and beat me up in recess. During lunch time wen i went to the washroom they emptied out my backpacks contents in the schoolyard and burried my pencils and stuff from my pencil case in the sand box. My closest girlfriend, the last one I had and my second was someone I really loved and was happy with yet that relationship ended and destroyed me even more. Though I finally made some friends in high school, the people from my previous school and others still continued to torment me for no reason it drove me insane and alone. this is a summary of my childhood torments and from those experiences i came to the following conclusion...
I envy those who have good friends, whenever I see friends with photos of each other, hanging out with each other and always wanting to be around each other... whenever I see people who have others that will support and protect them... I feel jealous. In all my years I have never had anyone but my loving family I can fully trust, that calls me instead of me bugging them, that wants to be around me and support me, that would stick with me to the end.. a true friend. I am destined to be alone, to have no friends, and to experience no love. There have been other experiences in my life besides what I described that have affected me so.
I have trouble in my studies, I can never fully concentrate until last minute though I seem to do pretty well. There have been many things I have wanted to achieve and changes i'e wanted to make to myself but I have failed to do so and I hate myself for being so careless, irresponsible, and stupid. I acknowledged that there is no personal reason for myself to exist in the world, besides become someone good so my parents can be proud that they did a good job raising me. I love my family they are the best parents to me and gave me more love than I could ever handle. I can never live up to my parents love, the only way I can repay them for loving such a useless thing as myself is through completing my school and becoming what they want me to be. I also live for children, I want to have children and have them live a good life strayed from any problems that I have already faced myself.
THe problem, I recently got into my second car accident, things are going so horrible and expenses are rising. My parents are already paying so much and are struggling, I am forgetting to do chores and because of that I am just being a freeloader. As for my studies, it seems i've been slacking off, yet I find it so hard to concentrate until it's last minute. Though I try to do things it seems I am just a lazy failure. I failed my parents, I failed myself, I am nothing but a burden withot motivation to succeed. the best solution is my own destruction, but I am too weak, so instead I will leave the house and fend for myself, removing the burden from my family of having such a useless son around. I don't deserve them and surely i've been shown that since the life I lived is proof enough my existence is pointless. Why shold I continue this unhappy life where everyday all I do is become hurt. People think I am a happy stupid kid because i'm always so hyper, yet I put on that mask to hide my sorrows. No matter how good I am to people, no matter how sociable, I can never get what I want or be truly happy. I either am disappointed, left alone, or betrayed and used.... why does life suck (link)
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It doesn't have to suck! I read you're story and these are my thoughts...
First of all you don't have to leave you're parents, they wouldn't let you live there if they thought you were a burden. (but helping out is always nice) N e ways, I'm sure that life is not as bad as you make it out to be. Maybe what you need is ambitions (that's an option) or maybe there's something that you're secretly good at! like drawing or writing, dancing, riding a harley Davidson! Whatever it is do it, make something out of it. I can't say I haven't had thoughts quite similar to yours, bu I always find something to be happy for! I'm a hyper person too and have a weird way of doing things bu' w/out having my goal of making everybody happy, even if it doesn't work the same 4 me. It makes me feel better! When i see someone smile and happy on my account I can't help bu have some sort of boast of confidence! ^^!
B-sides you never know when somebody may envy you! you'd b suprised, even though it seems untrue, there's always atleast one person around you that thinks your amazing, you never know when the way you do things makes someone wish they could do as well!
And your stories of when you were small, you might have helped someone else have courage to face school, when you picked up and kept living w/it and went thruogh w/ life! 4 being able to go through all that and still try and find hope! Even I should envy you! N e ways, I'm glad i took the time to read you're story! You'd b suprised the effect it had on me!
Good Luck w/ life! *Smile* ^.^
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ok me and my ex b/f were dating for 17months when he started acting different so i asked him about it. He said that for the last few months he hasnt loved me the way i love him. he said that he only loves me as a friend so we both decided to be friends. the strange thing is that the next day he told me that he feels strange not haven me in his life like that. he asked me if he could still call me at nite and talk to me like we did when we 1st started dating. well he called me that nite and he wants to hang out like we were but not have the tittle as b/g friend. and i asked him what that meant and he wants to still lay together and just hang out with just us two and get to know eachother more then we already know eachother. and i asked him what if one of us starts to kiss the other or sumthing when we lay together and he said that if it happends it happends. he wants was to be close friends but i dont know what he means by that. please help me understand what he wants!!!! Thank you! (link)
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Hey there! It sounds to me like this guy has major needs! he says he doesn't love you bu' he can't cope w/ being alone. He's probably having a hard time trying to understand his own feelings. Jus cross ur fingers, bu' don't get too close, guys usually do know what they want, so hope he's not toying w/ you!
well good luck and hope everything comes clearer soon!
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